surgery on Monday

Our hearts and prayers go out to your daughter for a speed recovery. Facing surgery was difficult, but I remember after getting home from the hospital so unbelievably happy to be free from pain, and no more tons of medicine to take every day. I felt better than I had in years, was finally gaining weight. My only regrets was getting a j-pouch, which hasn't worked out for me and now I face more surgery to remove it. I got along great with my ileostomy.

Best of luck to her. The surgeries are tough but it's for a better way of living without pain and disease. I'm 16 had my first surgery about a year ago "about" and my only regret was giving up my ostomy. But I think it varies by people And their opinions. The j-pouch takes alot of time
To I guess fully expand and work but it just takes time.
I'm still learning how go use the bathroom and hold it In and stuff. I'm concerding having a surgery to go back to having an ostomy "after I grad next year."

Is it a 2 step or 3 step surgery?

-David Martin

davidm and collicat.

Yes it is going to be a two step surgery. She seems to be doing great at home. Other then not feeling very well.
Of course I would never let her know that maybe I have some doubts about the surgery. But what are the other options do we have?

80schick

Thank you so much. Every encouraging word helps. It is hard right now not knowing if I am doing the right thing for her or not. I am sure it is just a mom wanting the best for her daughter. Can I ask is why you have a permanent ileostomy and not the j-pouch? She wants the surgery, it is just hard putting something like this on a 15 year old to make a life changing decision. I don't want her months down the road regretting and being mad at me for letting her do this. I know that a lot of people say they never regret it. My daughter is pretty smart, I know she has looked on the internet for guidance. Every once in awhile she'll will tell me stories about what someone has said. Thank you so much for taking the time and writing to me.

suebear,

I didn't mean to make it sound like I was not supportive of her decision. We talked together about this while in the hospital. We could try humira, but we both decided not to try it and it not work and she will miss another summer of not doing anything. I just didn't want to put this all on a 15 year old to make a decision like this. She has no idea what I am writing on here. These are my own personal thoughts that I would never share with her. No you are wrong I know how she struggles with this. I might not know the pain she feels. But I know that this disease took my daughter away from me for the last 15months. I can't wait to see the sparkle come back in her eyes. Didn't mean to sound so harsh, but I just wanted to know for myself if this is the right decision. I am just afraid for her. I know after being up all night while she goes to the bathroom and her getting sick two to three times a week, I know deep down 'we have made the right decision.

I am a lurker who just registered... 36 year old female with UC for 12 years, in remission until 1 year ago and flaring since then, despite all the meds. I am going for surgery on Monday too! I wish your daughter luck!

summerstorm

Yes I know this is the right thing to do. Yes we tried all the meds, her choice also. But I have seen her over the past couple of days sick and puking and running to the bathroom, I can't wait till Monday so all this will be over. If she makes it till Monday. She is looking forward to the pain meds lol. Thank you everyone for the encouraging words. Will let you know how things are going.

polishdan

Mybe I am explaining things wrong. It might just be me scared to put my daughter through a surgery like this at such a young age. She has been doing her research on her own. She has been on here before, She is happy about her decision. Acually she can't wait till Monday. I support her all the way, maybe I am the one who needed some confidence in her decision. Talking with everyone on here has helped me alot I know now this is the right decision for her . Thank you everyone

shaz032

Thank you so much. Maybe that is what I needed to hear. It is just hard my friends are telling me not to do this. I think that is what is making this so hard. I know this is the best thing for her. She hasn't felt good since we have been home from the hospital. I am just getting a little nervous as the day is getting closer. Thanks again for everything.

summerstorm

Thank you, I know deep down this is the best for her. You are right they don't understand how she suffers. They think she just goes to the bathroom a lot. Their is a lot more to it then they realize. You don't realize how much everyone comments are helping.

worried mom,
I'm sorry I haven't replied sooner...things have been BUSY! (That's good news; with my Crohn's I had a LOT of downtime because I wasn't well enough to be busy)

I did not want a j-pouch because I have crohn's, and it could come back in my pouch. Not to mention that my rectum was spasming awfully, and also, I had lived ten straight years of diarrhea, and I was DONE. I feared that I'd still have diarrhea even with the J-pouch. I just wanted one surgery and I wanted it all to be over.

I agree with the above posters...your friends may mean well but seriously, they don't live the life your daughter does. If I was healthy I'd think this sounded sucky too, but honestly, this is the BEST thing I could have done.

Keep us posted on how your daughter is doing. I agree with whoever said you should let her read these...being educated about ostomies is incredibly powerful for someone with one, plus she won't feel alone.

Hi worried mom,
I am an 18 year old girl and I just had my colon removed on January 19th. I can relate to your daughter's situation very much, and I feel certain that the two of you are doing the right thing.
She may have regrets at first, but I don't think that should discourage you. At her and my age, having the ileostomy is difficult primarily due to body image issues. I am working through feelings of revulsion towards it, but the good news is that that part is temporary. I can't speak for the j-pouch yet as I won't be getting mine until July (I'm having a three step surgery) but what I can tell you is this: two days after my surgery, I already had less pain than I had during an average UC flare. I was off of morphine after two days, and off of Vicodin after six. Now all I take is Tylenol. People as young as your daughter heal phenomenally. :)
Your daughter will be glad to get this behind her. I chose to suffer with UC for my entire high school career and I regret all the time I lost being sick. It will be good for her to go to college not having to worry about UC flare-ups. I decided to get my surgery after attempting to start college and having a miserably sick first term. She needs this in order to get on with her life.
I bet her only regret will be not having done it sooner!
If she wants to talk to a girl close to her age, I could give you my email address to pass onto her. It helps having people who have been through the same thing as a support. Obviously I'm no expert, only being just over two weeks out of surgery myself, but I'd be more than willing to be a shoulder to lean on.
Best,
Rachel