some funny bathroom stories

The first 3 are my son, who if you read fb know he is a weird little fellow, with quite the way for words.
We went to the bowling alley, he went to the bathroom. Came running out, "mommy I'm scared! I think there's a ghost in the bathroom!"I said why he said "well on the wall it says I was here but mommy I didn't see anybody and I don't know where they went! " then he says "h--e-a-r that does spell here right?" I said yes, but that's hear like you hear something. So he says so its a dumb ghost! I had to try to explain to him how some people write things on the wall but I was laughing so hard!
The next day we went to play pool at a friends arcade. He had to go to the bathroom, he goes in and says "I can't use this one the water is blue." I said oh its ok, its just there to keep the toilet clean. So he goes in, and he always talks to himself while he poops and for some reason takes off all his clothes! Anyway I hear him say. "I wonder what's gonna happen when brown meets blue?" Then a minute later, "oh that's what happens!"
Then one morning he gets up runs in the bathroom picks the lid up to start peeing and yells "fire ahold!" He thinks it fire ahold, not fire in the hole! I still can't get hiim to believe me its not fire ahold!
The last one is mine. I went to the bathroom at walmart the other day, and of course was in a hurry. Well I emptied my bag, and went to put my little packet of asapt gel in there, I always use those in public. Anyway, the gel flew out everyhwere! All over my pants, the floor my hands, I think some even got the door! If you've ever used it you know how slimy it is and how hard it is to clean up. So I put what's left in my bag and of course I get it all over the tail, so I'm trying not to laugh, trying to hurry to clean this slimy mess up! It was disgusting but hilarious.