Sue,
Thanks for your very honest, clear and helpful reply... I hope my situation after surgery (whatever option I choose) works out nearly as well as yours. The first piece of your advice I will follow is to try posting on www.j-pouch.org... I have been reading some of the postings there (including yours) and many of the individuals (members?) seem to be going through or have gone through the decision making process I'm currently faced with.
The description of your own experiences sounds so positive that I forced myself to take the "devil's advocate" position for the following comments:
You are significantly younger than I am and certainly in much better shape (based on your very active lifestyle) than I can ever hope to be... I don't doubt that this has been a significant factor in your lack of complications... all of the medical papers I've read on the j-pouch indicate most people have more difficulty than you did and this is increasingly true for older patients. Also, some of the long term studies indicate a number of these complications increase over time. My biggest concern at this point in my life is to not be dealing with ongoing j-pouch problems and possible surgery as I move towards my 70s and beyond.
Regardless of which procedure I end up having, my quality of life (in terms of frequency, diet, lifestyle) will almost certainly deteriorate because my UC has, for the most part, been quite manageable over the years. I have never been hospitalized or homebound, I have been been able to travel extensively with my wife and I have always eaten whatever foods I most enjoyed... during flares (which typically meant more difficult mornings, frequency of 3 - 6 daily with varying degrees of blood and mucous) I would medicate until I stabilized.
I am much less concerned about the vanity or cost aspects of a permanent ileo than I am about the overall management of my condition... if I could be sure that a j-pouch would be as good for me as it is for you, it would be a no-brainer... however, much of the literature still refers to the permanent ileo as being the "safest with the least number of risks and long-term complications" ... (see http://www.mtsinai.on.ca/IBD/patient/UlcerativeColitus/pelvic-pouch.htm and keep in mind that my long term is likely to be quite a bit shorter than your long term!)
Despite what I have written above, you have given me excellent food for thought and a desire to hear more from others. I have already seen a very experienced colorectal surgeon (at the prompting of my GI)... he strongly recommended that I have the surgery sooner than later and when I asked him what he would do iin my situation, he said he would opt for reconstructive (j-pouch) surgery... adding that a permanent ileo was a perfectly acceptable and possibly more desirable option given my age.
Thanks again for your feedback... I look forward to seeing more of it in these forums.