poem

Poem

My arms and hands begin to shake
So much so that I begin to ache
My legs and feet grow stiff
My toes curl
I grow tired easily
I am still going even though it’s hard to tolerate
It interrupts my day when I try to enjoy it
It interrupts my sleep that I try to keep

I feel as though I slow others down when I am around them
Can barely put my hair up in a ponytail
I take the medications but it only does so much
Daily doctor’s appointments take over my life

I am careful with every step I take
I don’t want to fall and break
Some days are better than others
I try to stay positive
Cold weather seems to make my stiffness worse
Freezing in my legs interferes with my day

I don’t feel very independent
And yet I am only thirty-two
And I miss the energy I used to have
I am thankful to those who care
But I am tired of being dependent on others

The pills only help so much sometimes I wonder if they help at all
When I try to walk the cramping and stiffness stops me
I miss the life I had before the disease

I miss working
I miss being productive
Tired of the loneliness
Tired of the medication
Sick of it all