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looking for a lift. Feeling a bit anxious for no reason

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Posted 1/12/2009 6:42 PM (GMT 0)
To all the great people on this board, I need a liitle bit of a pep talk today. It has been a year since my diagnosis. I have educated my self and responded very well to hormone therapy. My initial dianosis was a PSA of 344 and today it is a .3. My urologist and Dr. at MD Anderson are very happy and tell me that the decrease in my PSA "means everything." I am assuming that being a little anxious might be a reult of not knowing how long the therapy will continue to work and what the future of Advanced Prostate Cancer holds for us men. I've commented on this board in previous posts that the future is bright and getting brighter all the time. Still I worry like many others. I stay connected to this board because the information and people here do care about people.

Looking for a small lift.

Thanks

Aspen4

Posted 1/12/2009 7:11 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Aspen4,

Perfectly natural to have a down day now and then. Your numbers look pretty good. For contrast my most recent PSA was .682 four months after IMRT and nine months after starting on Lupron. I think it easy to dwell on this if we let ourselves do so. The down feeling is also a side effct of the hormone as though having the disease is not bad enough. Sort of insult to the injury. I usually try to look at the good things that are happening rather than the bad. I have even written them down on occassion. Seems to help when I get preoccupied with the negatives.

I can empathize with you on the concern with knowing how long it will work. It is working now and the longer it does the more there is a chance of some new treatment option. I also look at the results some of the other folks on this site have had. Some are quite remarkable.

One more thing. A friend sent me an article recently that indicated that patients who maintained a positve outlook did better and/or recovered faster from chronic or major illnesses. Just another reason to keep on keeping on.

Hope the day gets better for you.

Take care,
Don
Posted 1/12/2009 7:15 PM (GMT 0)
Simple words that have a huge impact. Thanks for responing.

Posted 1/12/2009 7:15 PM (GMT 0)
Aspen,
You have reasons to feel concerned, but you also have reaons to feel good, too. I know it's hard being in that "twilight zone" with your treatments. But it is a waste of time to let it take a good day away from you. I have seen many guys do so well in your stage, that I couldn't possibly predict when HT fails. The fact is, you have many options still ahead. But first try to keep the cart behind the horse and be thankful for today first, and then tomorrow, and so on. You have your family, and great friends, I'm sure (like here for example).

With my testing this week, my thought going into it is simple ~ it will be what it will be, and after I come home, I will deal with anything in the road ahead the way I always do. I do what I love to do when I hear bad news, I love those around me even more, and play my music, I head out and add new things to do, and I survive...Do I cry.? Yes, but not as much, and I don't let sadness stick around for long. I have better things to do.

Be thankful it is still working, and know what you may do next but don't jump ahead. The future is today! Enjoy the day!

Peace brother!

Tony
Posted 1/12/2009 7:20 PM (GMT 0)

Thanks Tony. Hope things go really well for you. I relate to your situation and how you handle it. I stay mostly up but on occasion it does rear its ugly head.

thanks

Posted 1/12/2009 8:07 PM (GMT 0)

This is what the results of testing revealed...and since then.

Thanks for the great words of encouragement.

Biopsy of 12 cores revealed:

3 3+4 80-100%

8 3+3 50-90%

2 cores revealed Benign Prostatic Tissue....no score

Initial PSA 344

12/03/08   .3

Some lymph node involvement but nodes have shrunk by 2/3 since Feb. 08

No Mets.

Currently on Lupron and Casodex.

Drs. at MD Anderson read the slides and all the reports from my Urologist and here is what he told my wife and me:

8-12 years  Maybe radiation, possibly Proton.

After dramatic drop in PSA was very happy.....so was I.

Going back every 6 months for CT Scan and Bone scan...... just to keep my foot in the door

Seeing my Urologist every 3 months for "The Shot"

Posted 1/12/2009 8:49 PM (GMT 0)
Hello Aspen,
We all have those kind of days from time to time, and sometimes when I do, it's at a time when nothing extra wrong is going on, or perhaps, everything is fine. Might just be my brain catching up to my body, not sure. Looks like you still have made a lot of progress in that one year, that is a massive improvement in your PSA. You know by now, this is a good place to come for comfort, or to vent or to pontificate in general like I am doing. lol. Stay in close touch, we are each fighting a seperate battle, but all in the same war against PC, there is strength in numbers. I hope you feel better about things soon, and get on the upswing again, you are still well in the fight, and doing well.

My best to you,

David in SC
Posted 1/12/2009 8:55 PM (GMT 0)

Thanks David

Each one of you who post on this board or rally to the side of those who need some sort of lift............God Bless

Posted 1/12/2009 8:59 PM (GMT 0)
Lyodd Ney founder of www.Paactusa.org did way better than the prognositicators were telling him (LHRH drugs weren't even here then, treatments were limited, radiation was pathetic back then) and this was a way different era, he had to goto Canada to get the drug (flutamide or casodex), it was a while back and he fought it for I think 14 yrs. and astounded many people. His fight brought us their Newsletter and assistance for other patients with serious prostate cancer. There are more drugs and protocols and treatments and best yet...our technology is actually progressing at a pace that makes the prior 100 hundred years...the stone age.
It seems the answers might lie in manipulation of cell receptors and they have identified a number of them, it is like planning to go to the moon, we did it because we believed we can. Some folks are working on this globally and think they can. Hey, we don't care what country is first in this, just get it here. Historically that has hope for us.
Posted 1/12/2009 10:44 PM (GMT 0)
Aspen-
I have the same concerns for my father. I know what the statistics say, but for now, I believe that you can't look too hard at the statistics for stage 3 & 4 guys. Treatments have changed so much, even in the past year. When it was time for my father's decision regarding adjuvant therapy, the jury was still out adjuvant radiation and there were no well controlled studies that showed a survival benefit for adjuvant radiation when a lymph node was involved. We went ahead and moved forward with the radiation, and a few months later, a study came out and showed there is a benefit for adjuvant radiation. Thank God my dad did it! I guess my point is, there are studies being done now, which some of our members are involved in that are very promising. We just have to continue to hope and be confident that tomorrow will continue to bring forth new treatment options.
My dad had another Lupron shot this morning and I too always get a little anxious around this time, but I am hopeful for both you and my dad. Hang in there!
Posted 1/12/2009 11:15 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Aspen4,

I'm really new here. I need much more reassurance than I can give but I'm one more member of the "family" for you. Hang in there.

Best wishes.

Mike
Posted 1/13/2009 12:16 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks to all of you.

Posted 1/13/2009 12:23 AM (GMT 0)
I can only hope and try to stay on the positive side of the road with this cancer.

Posted 1/13/2009 12:30 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Aspen4,

I'm just weeks into this and I'm already on a roller-coaster, going from the depths of depression, crying and screaming to God for help and then calming myself and hoping for years of sharing my life with the ones I love and all of my new family here.

Please email me any time you want to talk.

Mike
Posted 1/13/2009 12:46 AM (GMT 0)
Dear Aspen, You have been given very good advice here. Working out, walking (especially) can give you energy and a new lease. Nature always is a refresher....

"Climb the mountains and get their good tidings
Nature's peace will flow into you
as sunshine flows into the trees.
The winds will blow their own freshness into you...
While cares will drop off like autumn leaves.
..... John Muir
This is your life. This is your journey. You are the hero...

(After saying all of that.....HT has a side effect of sometimes depression. You may want to see if your doctor recommends an antidepressant...You have situational depression, and it may help alleviate it a little. I know that Pete and I also took an antidepressant for a few months until we felt better.

Come back anytime. We all understand. You can say anything here.....Diane
Posted 1/13/2009 12:59 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Aspen4,

Just saw this article on the news site about some breaking research. I thought it might give you a lift. Of course it only works in mice so far. Don't you wish you were a mouse sometimes?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28470061/

Take care,
Don
Posted 1/13/2009 1:07 AM (GMT 0)

Thanks for all the good medicine being thrown my way. My Drs. have given me reason to be optimistic. New therapies are in the pipeline and managing this disease will get better for all of us in the very near future. I just let my guard down a little and drove off into the negative side of the street. We should all be optimistic that we will manage this thing rather than die from it.

Thanks again

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