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Posted 4/17/2009 1:36 AM (GMT 0)
What can anybody tell me about depression about 9 months after surgery? I know it can bother you if you have ADT treatment but I only had robotic surgery, nothing else.

Everything is great now. The cancer was gone. I was happy because I could get erections. I was happy because things turned out well. I belong to the less than .01 club!

Even though I had an infection and was hospitalized again, it was OK! Then my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer. All was OK as she got a good report after surgery.

We took a nice cruise a while back. And enjoyed both of us being in good health. Now all of a sudden I am so depressed that I burst out in tears for no reason. Something as simple as thinking of a place we visited that was so neat, and wham!, I am in tears.

I could have understood if it was after diagnosis or even after my wifes, but now that we have a good record, good jobs, nice trip, etc. it hits with a vengence.

I am on nerve meds and it is helping a little.

Just thought maybe someone could share some thoughts about what happened to them and what they did.

Posted 4/17/2009 1:48 AM (GMT 0)
My old college roommate is a counselor. He told me a while back that some people have a delayed reaction in dealing with stressful situations, and depression can set in even after the situation is over. Maybe that's what you're experiencing.

Posted 4/17/2009 1:51 AM (GMT 0)
Califguy,
I think it is normal to get a little down after such a roller coaster of events and having come thru it all with flying colors. Like they say what goes up must come down. You were happy with both of your outcome, you took a cruise in celebration and now you are back to earth and a normal every day life. In a short time you will feel fine going back to your normal routine. Remember, yesterday is only a dream and tomorrow is only a vision, but today, well lived, makes every yesterday a dream of happiness and every tomorrow a vision of hope.
Posted 4/17/2009 1:55 AM (GMT 0)
CalifGuy,

Welcome back and nice to see you. From your stats you are doing well with the PC, and it sounds like your wife is doing good too considering.

No shame in depression. There is a thin line between normal depression and clinical depression, which in turn can turn to Major Depressive Disorder. I have been there, done that. If you are not seeing a dr. for the depression, you need to, you could start with your GP if you have a good one. Sometimes, depression comes on at the weirdest times, like you said, when everything is going well. It is still basically a chemical in-balance, triggered by lots of things like stress, and post-stress.

You said you are on meds, are they helping? If you don't mind, what do they have you on so far. What has worked well for me in the past, and my wife currently using it, is Lexapro or you can save a lot of money by using the older version Celexa. They work well with mild depression and/or panic disorder. The only side affect, is it will make you almost forget about sex. Doesnt suppress the ability, just the desire. But there are any number of good meds.

If you are beyond just meds, then meeting with a good counseler along with the meds might make more sense, in case the depression is rooted to something else going on.

The worse thing, and men are the worse at this, is to try to macho your way out of depression, or to tough it out, that was my big mistake several years ago, and all it did was deepen the problem. I have been all all meds for that for over 1 1/2 years now, and feel much better about life.

I hope you only the best, and if you need the help, get the help. I know where you are coming from, and depression is the silent killer sometime. A tormented mind is no fun. Let me know how you are doing.

David in sC
Posted 4/17/2009 2:28 AM (GMT 0)

My primary care gave me a generic xanax to give me a boost and then zoloft. I had tried celexa once for anxeity and he thought maybe zoloft this time. Also UCSF wants me to come see a social worker who deals with this problem after prostatectomy. I am waiting for that to be scheduled. I know it will all be OK just is a shock it hit so hard way past everything.

2008 was such a roller coaster...
Diagnosis Feb 2008
Father in Law had Gullian Barre Symdrome - Temporairly paralayzed Feb 2008
My Mother passed away unexpectedly Mar 2008
Prostate surgery cancelled April of 2008 due to hernia mesh problem
Father in Law had recovered but got blood clot and had leg amputated Jun 2008
Robotic Surgery delayed until July 2008 due to work stoppage at UCSF
Infection in lymph gland removal area October 2008
Back in hospital at UCSF November 2008
Wife Diagnosed Breast Cancer -Masectomy Dec 2008

Thanks!

Posted 4/17/2009 2:39 AM (GMT 0)
That's ok, califguy. It can happen to anyone at anytime for any reason. Sounds like you got a plan going there, hope it works well for you
Posted 4/17/2009 3:31 PM (GMT 0)
Hey Calif,

I had severe depression about 3 months after surgery and found it was due to low testosterone. You might get your level tested just to rule that out as a possible cause...

Jim
Posted 4/17/2009 3:55 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Califguy,
Prostate cancer is depressing. It doesn't matter the treatment modality, we are all vulnerable to depression. Not everyone gets it, but as I head into my third year I have seen it, experienced it, and even predicted it. I thought I was immune, but the first time ever in my life I had it last year. I at first thought the passing of a loved one was the trigger, but it was already triggered. I just didn't pay any respect to it and let it take over. By far the worst side effect (or should I say sympton) of prostate cancer is depression.

What to do? For me it was confront it. I made my motto "STAY POSITIVE" and placed it in my signature, like so many of us here have done to remind others. But I think it's more for me than anyone else.

I hope you feel better, soon. Depression takes so much away that it has to be addressed. May peace be with you.

Tony
Posted 4/18/2009 12:05 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks for sharing this. It took me 20 months before depression set in but when it did it hit hard. Most of the men on this forum either have or will experience depression. Without knowing much about the dynamics of your life I will refrain from much advice, I will however say to slow down, relax and take a look around at the awesomeness of creation. You have a new lease on life and the next chapter in the book is waiting on you to write it. Stay with us and please email me if I can be of any help.

Love you my brother.

dale
Posted 4/18/2009 2:05 AM (GMT 0)
As others have said, this is more common than you obviously thought. Believe or not, there are also many people who do not even realize they are depressed. They just can't figure out why they can't sleep, are having trouble getting work done or feeling vaguely overwhelmed by everyday life.
Remember, it is, as Purgatory said, a chemical imbalance. Nothing to be ashamed of any more than being ashamed of being diabetic or having a cold.
I have often said that doctors should hand out cards of a good therapist when they announce a diagnosis of cancer. It is enormously stressful. Add to it, your wife's health issues and you have become a prime candidate. Wellbutrin is nice since it has the fewest sexual side effects of all the SUI's.
I fought depression after my 4 yr old was diagnosed with Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis, my father's death and my cancer all within months of each other. it's a normal reaction and I think very common. Glad to see you are in a doctor's care. If things don't improve very soon, please see a psychiatrist. MD's aren't always the best at matching meds with patients.
Paul
Posted 4/18/2009 2:25 AM (GMT 0)
Good advice about the psychiatrist if needed, no shame there. It amazes me how much stigma there is with depression, anxiety disorder, or any other type of imbalance problem of the mind. People look at you, and can't see anything wrong, and are clueless. Sounds like you had a full plate there Paul, that was a lot to digest and handle in a short time period. Hope you are doing better with it now.

A lot of well meaning GP's dispense out anti-depression drugs radomly, hoping to find a good fit, either that or its whatever their drug rep was dealing after supplying the dr's office staff with a free lunch and a box of coffee mugs. Can't believe I said that, lol.

David in SC
Posted 4/18/2009 11:52 AM (GMT 0)
Cal,
I agree w/ Biker. Have your Doc check your testosterone. Shortly after my surgery. I became depressed so I went to my Uro and then my reg. Dr. and they both suggested a shrink. So I found one and was put on several antidepression meds. Nothing helped! This went on for over three years until a new Doc I tried out suggested having my "T" checked. I was at castration levels and diognosed w/ hypogonadizm, ny testicles no longer produces "T" but back then no Doc would consider giving me "TRT" or testosterone replacement theropy. After much searching I finnally found a Uro who would treat me. I've been with him on T replacement for over 2 years now and probably will be for the rest of my life and my PSA is still zero! It;s worth having it checked out as I've found it's more common with PC guys after surgery than previously thought.
Good luck Cal>
Your friend,
Pete
Posted 4/18/2009 12:15 PM (GMT 0)

“Cure All” from Doc Don – aka my shrink….

 

Have you ever waxed your own car/truck? Odds are you get a nice feel good moment every time you get in it for the next few weeks.

 

Ever tripped out piles of dirty laundry for several days and then broke down and washed all?

 

Broke down and cleaned the garage after procrastinating about it for months?

 

Finished putting the final touches on that back patio you’ve been working on for a long while?

 

Taking care of the “small business” items I mentioned above is good for the soul. Look for and start doing something like the above everyday.…Once you get in the habit – start tackling the big items.

 

If you haven’t talked to a love one in year’s cause of an argument you had – call them. Even if you get their voice mail, you’ll feel better for just having made the call. If they call back and you work things out – You’ll have one less piece of baggage to carry around and the weight of the world will feel a lot lighter.

 

If all else fails – become an alcoholic. (JUST KIDDING)

Posted 4/18/2009 5:14 PM (GMT 0)
Califguy,

When I read your post it was like Deja vu. Three weeks after my surgery my mother passed away. Seven months later we had to place my oldest sister into an assisted living facility because of Alzheimer's. Two months later she falls a fractures a hip. Has surgery and 10 days later a clot breaks lose and kills her. Our dog gets sick at the same time and comes close to dying three or four times. She eventually survives and is doing well. After all that I founf myself very depressed. Dealing with the ED just added to the stress. I finally sought some counseling which heped and then my doctor placed me on Cymbalta which really helped. I stayed on Cymbalta about a year then felt I did not need it anymore and have been doing great since. My point is GET HELP! We men can be too stuuborn for our own good many times.

Tamu
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