Missyj - This is my first post to this forum. I have been a lurker for quite a while and have been meaning to register and tell our story, (I'm the wife). Your post compelled me to register and reply.
I don't know all of the details of your husband's treatment so far but I can see from your signature that he was diagnosed with advanced pca. I would think the most important thing would be to ensure your husband is seeing an Oncologist who specializes in Prostate Cancer. There are a handlful of top-knotch pca oncologists here in the USA, not sure about UK. My husband had a recurrence after his RRP in October '07 and we were referred by his surgeon to an oncologist in our city. Although we were told that this Dr is very highly regarded, (and I have no doubt that he is good), he does NOT specialize in pca and his approach seemed to be pretty cookie-cutter: hormone treatments, then chemo, then you die. That was pretty much his message. We decided to take a more proactive approach to treatment and my husband is now seeing one of the top pca oncologists in the country. It is my understanding that some of these doctors have had some success with treating patients with advanced pca. I know the list of doctors has been posted here before with contact information, but not sure by who. Perhaps someone who knows will chime in. But I do know that the following are some of the most highly regarded pca oncologists in the USA:
Dr. Stephen Strum
Dr. Charles "Snuffy" Myers
Dr. Robert Leibowitz
Dr. Mark Scholz
Perhaps there are some in the UK that you can consult with to determine additional treatment options.
Best of luck to you and your husband ... don't give up!!
Amy