Posted 6/27/2010 8:42 AM (GMT 0)
50 today!
Not a PSA of 50, or 50 sessions of RT, or 50 questions for your uro, or 50 tips about how to cope with PCa, nor my 50th post, but my 50th Birthday.
Okay so a lot has happened since my 49th birthday, and I’m not the way I thought I’d be at 50, but I’m having a great weekend. No party planned or visitors, not even family, as with RT only finished two weeks ago we realized that we had no idea how I’d feel by today, especially as I am “head of catering” in the family and had no energy to do all the extra grocery shopping, food preparation, cooking clearing up etc. Visitors and some sort of celebration will thus occur later in the summer: my wife was 50 earlier in the year so we can have some kind of joint party.
As for how I am today:
I’m not depressed, but there is quite a bit of frustration in my head regarding what has happened to my body, my quality of life etc. However, given the bereavements, and other major problems which others in my life, and elsewhere, have suffered since my diagnosis, I know I have not had it as bad as it can be.
ED is not a problem for me at present and the fact that “fun and games” now takes more than 30 minutes rather than less than 20 does have an up side. Orgasm rather than Erectile Dysfunction is my area of difficulty, but hey, it’s a problem that’s no bother to keep working at.
My bladder is in two minds regarding continence. Last night I just about went a whole night without needing to get up, yet yesterday afternoon I was leaking like a dripping tap, and of course that happened when I was out at the shops so I had to grab some paper towels from the men’s room in a department store whack them in the way of the dribbler and hope for the best. Luckily it has been really hot weather here and I was wearing patterned shorts.
As for the future, well I don’t feel like I have a lot of control about what is going to happen but I have the following in the corner of the screen of my laptop:
“If I have less time then I must do more of everything I enjoy.”
So on my birthday I have just baked some scones to be able to have scones and cream and home-made strawberry jam for tea.
Alfred