Sad case

When doc came into my exam room this afternoon, I could tell he wasn't his usually chipper self. I asked him what had him down, and he had just met with a patient (no names of course) and his psa was over 5000, and he had metastasis from head to toe. I commented that with that psa level he was in trouble and already had epe, and probably only had a few years. Doc said he would be gone in a month.

Patient was only 60. It broke my heart. Hearing this affected me much more than I thought it would. I'm really down as a result. I suppose that my fear is that this could be me in a few years. Plus I genuinely identify with the feelings this fellow is going through....whoever he is.

k

That's heartbreaking.  I recently experienced something similar when I was at the office of the doctor who has been treating my lymphoma.  I have a very treatable but rare form of T-Cell lymphoma.  It's a very slow growing cancer and the survival rate is excellent provided that it's treated early.  This lymphoma actually manifests itself in the early stages as a rash on the skin and looks just like eczema.

My doc came into the examining room and he, too, was not his usual happy-go-lucky self.  He shared with me that he'd just seen a 33 yr old man with the same lymphoma as mine and his prognosis was very bad.  The disease had spread through the lymph system to his bones.  When my doctor queried him about why he'd not sought medical assistance sooner, the man responded that he did not have medical insurance and could only afford to have his children be seen by doctors for routine well care and childhood diseases.   

That is a shame.  Teaches us all the importance of regular check-ups.

Interesting info Bill. Why my doc assumed this guy wouldn't last much longer........ Apparently they had just gotten the results of bone scan and/or cat scan. Doc did know that he had metastasis in his skull, kidneys, liver, bladder, ribs, and, pelvis. The only reason this patient came to see a doctor was because his kidneys became blocked and he was suffering as a result. Can you imagine the symptoms he's most likely been dealing with for the last few months/years?

I have a friend who is a school teacher; 59 years old who cannot pee at night even when he really needs to go. He and I sat down the other day, and I told him what I would do with those symptoms. He probably just has BPH, but,...you never know.
He's never had his psa checked, never had a DRE, and never even discussed it with family doc who he hasn't seen in years.

He hates doctors. Go figure

k

When I was hanging out in the hallways of the hospital waiting for my bone scan, my CT scan, my nuclear stress test, and various other tests, I would see patients who were obviously in extremely bad shape, sitting idly in wheelchairs, heads hanging down, grey complexions, often with a distressed wife nearby trying to be helpful, and I remember thinking, "These poor souls are invisible to the outside world.  They're hustled in an out of the hospital, and other than the staff here and some close relatives, no one knows of their suffering, and certainly not enough people care."  It saddened me a great deal.

GOTTA STAY STROG & POSITIVE. I have to many other problems to worry about PCa.


Rich

NEIrish said...
kbota: The doc was feeling badly and communicated the news of one patient to another patient. He's human, and it's good that he has empathy for those in his care, BUT perhaps he should have kept the news to himself and used a more appropriate outlet to vent his own emotions, other than to another patient with the same cancer in his practice. You've said it saddened you (I'd expect nothing less from most on this site) but do you feel it was something you benefited from knowing since you're relieved to be not walking in that poor mans shoes, or was it something that brought you more distress? "First do no harm" is their oath. What do you think the knowledge ultimately did to you?

Mr Irish; You are absolutely correct and I have certainly considered your exact points. I was discussing with my wife that I could have gone a long time without hearing about that. I felt tremendous grief for this gentleman. The other thing I've thought is that it suggests how I should prepare my own life. Now, I'm not nearly in this fellows situation, and I plan to live several more years, but,.......I am a gleason 9. I have found nothing good or encouraging about a G 9. There are a few success stories out there, and I am very proud of those guys, and thankful for them. They give me hope, especially since mine was organ confined,...but....statistically, I will deal with a recurrence at some point in the future. The only question seems to be when.

As for my doc being human. In a perfect world, he would have considered the impact it would have on me, and kept it to himself, as there was nothing I could do except empathize with both of them, and pray for the fellow in trouble....hmmm....Maybe that is my purpose?

However, I cannot fault the doc. Maybe he felt that he and I have a solid enough relationship that he could unload a little, at a time when he obviously needed to. It's a huge burden to carry don't you think?

The bottom line is that what's done is done, what's said is said. We cannot take back the spoken word....no matter how hurtful it might be, which is why I have tried to be much more careful in my "mature" years.

Certainly I will get over this much better than the gentlemen with advanced disease, and he has yet another person praying for him that he doesn't even know of. Personally, I can accept that.

k

those were terrible sad stories. hard to find a positive in it.

david in sc

goes to show we need to live everyday as positive as we can. These stories could be any of us in the future. THanks for the post

peace to all
Dale

That is such a sad story and makes me believe that PSA testing and DRE can extend or save a life.  When it was time for my mammogram, it was time for his testing.  All we can do is pray for years of good health.

Thank you, kbota.

Aimzee

There are many sad cases with cancer. When I was doing my IMRT there was a young girl at the center being treated with chemotherapy. She had red hair, bangs, and was perhaps 10 or 11 years of age. I don't know how her treatment came out but seeing someone that young have to go through cancer treatment saddened me tremendously.

And last year, one day after my seed implant surgery in November, my wife's best friend died of lung caner, at age 62 and within less than two years of diagnosis. She never smoked in her life, drank wine in moderation, was in great shape physically, and was very careful about what she ate, growing most of her own vegetables in her back yard garden.

Thinking about what others go through with other types of cancer, like the young red haired girl, and my wife;s friend, helps me a lot in putting my own situation with prostate cancer in perspective.

Sancarlos

 

But - the attitude of some doctors leaves much to be desired.  My "Family Doctor" considered that unless you show signs of urinary difficulties, he would not even suggest a PSA when other tests were being done.
 
I am a classic case in point..  Had I not changed doctors, it may have been years before I had a PSA, and the change of doctor and a full blood test, led to a speedy RRP..    I NEVER asked what blood tests he was doing -- I trusted when he said  "All's Fine - See Ya !"

<He's never had his psa checked, never had a DRE, and never even discussed it with family doc who he hasn't seen in years.>

I would like to think that each of us, NOW, sees his life-mission to be to spread the word, and ensure that all those others, know "Get the finger", or in the least, a PSA test.

Like with Ovarian Cancer, once it 'escapes' your life-chances are severely impacted.

How many of these threads are tagged with tales of growing PSA, then BPH, and finally CANCER. 

The individual's luck, lies in the stage at which the cancer is detected. 

AND - how many other threads suggest that the Bx was normal, when in fact the cancer was at the back of the prostate and was never detected by various Bx's , until the cancer finally grew into view.

How badly, we men are discriminated against, here in Oz. 

First I and then my Brother were found to have PC.....   At the same time, his wife was found to have Breast-Cancer.  All three within 6mths.

The Out-Of-Pocket cost of surgery for the three of us were  --  ME - $5000,   Bro - $8000,  Wife - $250

I speak to people having the same LRP operation and paying   $13,000 to $40,000 for the same thing..

There is a clear attitude that Breast-Cancer is far more important to treat than PC, as reflected in the Govt. (MediCare) rebates etc.etc.  Even the Health-Insurance Industry, seems to see  BC  as  more important than  PC..

.

.

This is a topic I was discussing with my husband only yesterday.

I cannot count how many times in the last 20 years I have heard "if men got breast/ovarian/cervical cancer/PMS/post natal depression then the disease would be taken seriously both in hospitals and in research". Now that my husband has got diagnosed with PC I realise how wrong that is. Men have got it so much worse.

Breast cancer has been so successful in getting the limelight because women have been able to talk about it, to make it a sociatal problem rather than a woman's problem. My best friends mother was drowning in support, without even looking for it, from the hospital, counselling services, the breast cancer foundation when she recently was diagnosed with breast cancer. My husband was discussing lumpetomies/masectomies/chemo with her and she was happy to discuss options, her situation with him.

I think that this website is special because it allows us all to talk about prostate cancer in an open way. But I imagine the vast majority of men who have been diagnosed with PC would even find this anonomous discussion too confronting. Even here I have come across people saying that I would not be able to understand treatment choices, options because I am a woman. That is the wrong way to think, this disease needs to be out in the open and discussed widely by females, males, families, around the water cooler at work. Most people don't even know where the prostate is, many people I know believe its part of the digestive tract and up the rectum somewhere.

And what got me really angry was that in Walsh's book it said that if you had a 50 year old woman present with a positive mamogram and a 50 year old man present with a PSA level of greater than 4.0, who would be more likely to have cancer (p156)? It's the man! And there is so much controversy about biopsies and PSA tests for men whereas there is so much support for mamograms and biopsies for women. It just seems downright wrong.

An