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Posted 5/19/2011 11:07 AM (GMT 0)
Guys,
I know we all like good news in the morning. Well I have a day brightener for you!

For those of you who don't know me, I am post RP and come fully equipped with a sling. It works great for incontinence but does take me a while to pee. That gives me plenty of time to think and play with the bubbles. (Ladies, that is one benefit of having a Y chromosome.)

During this morning's pee I decided to see if I could use my stream to write my name in the water - in script, of course. Well, I managed to write my full name (first and last), my social security number and my phone number - with area code!

Too bad Spring is here. I can't wait for the next snowfall! Youtube here I come!

Jeff (The 500 ml barrier has been broken!)

(I'm not kidding.)
Posted 5/19/2011 11:43 AM (GMT 0)
Post when you do Gettysburg Address.
Posted 5/19/2011 1:08 PM (GMT 0)
you would go viral
Posted 5/19/2011 1:21 PM (GMT 0)
Jeff don't worry be happy.....(LOL)...great sense of humor....you know I love that stuff.

You could do a youtube writting in the snow...as long as you don't video the 'pen' in hand during the writtings (lol). The 'pen' is mightier than the 'sword'. Don't eat yellow snow goes without saying, even dogs know that.
Posted 5/19/2011 1:26 PM (GMT 0)
I will see how far I get tomorrow. Must I spell out the numbers or may I use numeric digits?
"4 score and....

I will be very careful about filming any portion the "pen". It might be misconstrued as a s*x offense in several states.
Posted 5/19/2011 1:28 PM (GMT 0)
OK now that you have developed the abilty to write, we need to think colors. Even do some type of folk art maybe. The art people define some drawings as primative, that type of art work should fit into that nicely, maybe one day some of the work will end up on antiques road show?
Ron

ps, 500+ml that's impressive!

Posted 5/19/2011 2:04 PM (GMT 0)
I'm glad you noticed the 500ml. Speaking in technical terms that's "a whole mess 'o pee!" Combine that with a minuscule flow rate and you can imagine why my mind has a chance to wander.
Jeff
Posted 5/19/2011 2:58 PM (GMT 0)
Jeff, you have far too much (and maybe something else) time on your hands.

Next thing we know you will be writing out your posts in snow or white sand, taking pictures of the post and emailing them in.

Sonny
Posted 5/19/2011 3:08 PM (GMT 0)
Congrats on the 500ml. Of course you have now admitted that you are still sneaking data collection in there. We won't tell your wife. haha.
Posted 5/19/2011 3:22 PM (GMT 0)
You are a funny guy.  I always love your posts.  Even when you were in misery, you found humor in suffering.  I am happy you were able to write you name. 
Posted 5/19/2011 3:26 PM (GMT 0)
Sonny,
Hey, I spend 18 minutes a day peeing! What do you want me to do? Read a book? As they say: "A mind is a terrible thing to waste."

Lowandslow, I'd be lying if i said my Mettler hasn't weighted a few cupfuls of warm liquid over the past month or two.

Jeff
Posted 5/20/2011 9:43 AM (GMT 0)
Guys,
I just took the Goodlife Gettysburg Address challenge.
Here's how far I got:

"4 score and 7 years ago our fathers brought forth on this... con... t... i..."

Fittingly, "Continent" is now my stretch goal.

I think I'll have a another cup of green tea and try again later. (When I have more ammo - and the wife is not home.)

Jeff (Every man should have a goal.)
Posted 5/20/2011 10:17 AM (GMT 0)
Jeff -
- am concerned about the amount you are peeing - is 500ml the max the typical bladder can hold - but then, engineers are not always typical.
:-)
- am concerned about possible competition in the artworld - art agents are always on the lookout for a breakout trend and a hot item to sell in the outsider/ tramp/ folk art area
- SUGGESTION: take a blank stretched canvas - 24" x 30" and place on ground outside - squirt a variety of acrylic paints on the canvas - let some of the local critters run across it ( before they meet their maker - courtesy of the NRA or maybe lighting system in the barn) - and then blend the colours with a peeing session (while listening to music) - and call it "Meditations on a Chipmunk - the Debussy Series"
-hugs,
BRONSON
Posted 5/20/2011 11:57 AM (GMT 0)
Bronson,

Thanks for the tip. The production of artwork might become a welcome addtion to my retirement income stream.

As an experienced artist, I have a question for you. To increase durability, and reduce the potential for unpleasant odors, I would like to cover the finished work with an appropriate clear coat. What would you recommend for such a piece? I am considering urethane, enamel, epoxy, or a triphenyltriazine based UV cured acrylate. I am leaning toward the latter since I already have ample sources of UV A, B and C in the barnlab.

Regarding the 500 ml. After being incontinent for 18 months my bladder was the size of a 'pee'nut. Since the sling installation I have been stretching it bit by bit by delaying my morning pee. Four months ago when I needed to be catheterized for a complete blockage, more than 600ml shot out when the foley went in so I know I can go that far without fear of exploding.

Who knows, by September GFMPH I might be up to ".....a new nation" !

Jeff
Posted 5/31/2011 2:04 PM (GMT 0)
Guys,

I'm still practicing almost every morning. I can now dot the I's and cross the T's!
It's a wonder to behold!
Everyone should have a talent.

Jeff (Easily entertained)
Posted 5/31/2011 3:10 PM (GMT 0)
Jeff- are you sure you're not on ADT drugs at this time??? I am worried you are being influenced by something, couldn't be zufus syndrome that shouldn't be contagious. Perhaps a recent alien abduction, have you been around area 51 or Roswell???? We have even some hollywood types claiming they had been abducted by aliens. devil


Good luck with the artistic expression aspects, I bet the yellow paint will run....but what do I know about art? Hope it gets framed and that you don't get framed (LOL). Put some paintings on ebay and we will even buy them. You will need a pen name as a new artist......? idea


Now with our group and E.D. the new Gettysburg address.....4 scored and the others didn't do as well...!!! blush

Post Edited (zufus) : 5/31/2011 9:13:12 AM (GMT-6)

Posted 5/31/2011 4:14 PM (GMT 0)
Zufus- I'm definitely not included in the "4 scored" but I can write it.

I have discovered another advantage to "needle flow" as it is called in the research literature. Since urea is considered 46-0-0 fertilizer, I can selectively and precisely add nitrogen around my wife's flowers without fear of overfeeding or burning.

I'll be sure to hide all the knives before I try this. I have no intention of owning a Bobbitt hobbit. ;-)

Jeff
Posted 5/31/2011 10:19 PM (GMT 0)
WORRIED GUY JEFF -
- just found your response to my art comment - would be concerned that any acidic reaction to the polymers or other media - would recommend just air-drying....

-today we set up the new art show in Lindsay, Ontario - had two "media interviews" - they did not respond to any of my statements regarding fundrasing or my prostate cancer or recovery (not able to use vibrating power tools while healing up) - they were more interested in why I chose certain colours for the sunsets or Newfoundland scenes...

... will be interesting to see how the four interviews (2 previous) and these two compare to each other - since they all wrote on the similar subject....
..but I digress... (that's what you get for working in the sun for 9 hours a day...)

sunscreened hugs,
BRONSON

p.s. Diuretart ( one name says it all - like Madonna..)

...
Posted 6/1/2011 1:00 AM (GMT 0)
jeff i never know whats coming next from you. i just wonder what percentage of your time in say four hours you are deciding what to write next with the yellow stuff. very humerous indeed. pigeonflyer neil your friend
Posted 6/1/2011 2:57 AM (GMT 0)
As a fellow engineer I must warn you that your fixation on historical texts suggests a serious turn for the worse. A sane engineer would be writing Lagrange resolvents for cubic equations or deriving the probability generation function for the normal (Gaussian) distribution (hint -- switch to polar coordinates.)

Please reconsider your life. Does your diet supply sufficient ethanol to sustain true intellectual creativity?
Posted 6/2/2011 12:56 AM (GMT 0)
Hey Geezer,

You're absolutely right. I should practice something useful. How's this?

Anthropocene, Holocene, Pleistocene, Pliocene, Miocene, Oligocene.
Watch out, Eocene. You're in my sights.

Jeff (Ole' needle spray)
Posted 6/3/2011 12:11 AM (GMT 0)
Wow, all of the eras in one standing? Amazing.
Posted 6/3/2011 12:27 AM (GMT 0)
Sad, but true. Very sad, but true. 2 minutes 15 seconds. 500 ml.

I still can't get to Eocene. I'll drink more tonight. If I can get to 550 ml, I can reach it. (Or pee my pants.)

This thread might not teach you anything about PCa but you will learn about the Geological Epochs.

Jeff (I think I'll go water the flowers)
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