John T said...
Why would anyone expect someone who didn't have PC to know anything about it. Just because our lives revolve around it it doesn't mean that others lives should. I doubt that few of us know what blindness or being a parapaligic feels like.
"When I told my mother, who has been in the medical field all her life, I had PC she just said, " I hope you take care of it." and never asked another question except the common "how are you doing" every once in a while.
Unless it concerns them personally, most people don't care much about the side effects you may have; they think more about what they are going to have for lunch."
I stayed out of this thread until I read John T's response cited above. John, I think you hit it on the nail the best (nothing against any of the other posts).
This is pretty much true about most things in life, in particular, medical matters and maladies. Unless one has experienced something, like cancer in our case, why would they know, let alone understand the nuances associated with it?
I started getting my PSA done at age 50, like a good boy should. But until I had my first biopsy at age 55, I honestly didn't know where my prostate was located, what it's function was, and my only concept of PC was that it was something that only very old men got. And I consider myself a fairly educated and well read person.
I met with a realtor this week, and she saw my cane, one thing lead to another, and I told her about my 4 year ongoing fight with PC. And she honestly said, that one phrase we all hate to hear, she said, "well at least you got the good cancer". I couldn't let it go, and I gave her a 2-minute recap of the last 4 years of my life, and she went flush, and was in shock.
Came to find out, her husband is 49, and his father and his grandfather both died of PC in their 50's, and she had wanted him to be tested. He is one of this "macho" men, that has too much pride to go to the doctor.
I used the moment to educate her on the importance of PSA testing, especialy in view of his family history. I said, have your husband call me sometime, and perhaps I could shock him into getting tested, to at least get a baseline.
I believe in being an open book on the subject. I am not ashamed of having PC, or the other 3 cancers I have survived. I won't open the conversation randomly with a stranger, but if there is an opening, I will always take it. I believe that strongly in our cause.
And I don't care what anyone thinks of me for having it, or being in my current condition. It's their problem, not mine. I have lost "friends" over the past 4 years, obviously using the term "friends" loosely, but I have gained so many more, including my friends here at HW, and ones I have met through the Oncology Rehab.
Though I am very limited to what I can and can't do anymore in my business world, I have gained a lot of respect from the CEO's, lawyers, etc, that I still deal with. They know that I am a fighter, and that I am not letting this thing called cancer take away who I really am. My body is one thing, my mind is another.
In our cancer fights, we win some people, lose some others, though I don't consider the losses much of a loss, personally.
David in SC
Post Edited (Purgatory) : 6/19/2012 9:13:34 PM (GMT-6)