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Worry: A bad habit that needs to be broken

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Posted 1/2/2014 3:34 PM (GMT 0)
Had to share this, since "worry" seems to be a common foe among many here.  No commentary from me, as I am a bit proponent of  the non-worry mode of thinking.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/think-confident-be-confident/201101/give-worry-recognizing-it-bad-habit

Posted 1/2/2014 3:48 PM (GMT 0)
David,

Thanks. Agreed - do what you can, don't worry 'bout the rest.

Years ago I was introduced to this way of thinking through the serenity prayer

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.

Have a great 2014

Pat
Posted 1/2/2014 3:57 PM (GMT 0)
I just posted this on another thread that was along these same lines, it fits in this discussion as well

"A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they’d be asked the “half empty or half full” question. Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired: “How heavy is this glass of water?” Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz. She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn't change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.” She continued, “The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything.” Remember to put the glass down.

Sonny
Posted 1/2/2014 4:01 PM (GMT 0)
Important takeaway from this article, in my view, is that people can change things about themselves, that they don't like. I find that more important then some of the specific "how to's". The main thing is wanting to change, and not beating yourself up, when you backslide, so to speak. I also like a lot of the articles' "how to's". There is decided slant towards the concept, that most worry is unfounded. To be sure this is true in a lot of anxiety. But there are things that happen to folks, that are indeed "real". None the less there is power within us all to defeat the anxiety even in these cases. Again you must want to. Its a Hobson's choice. Suffer the temporary {forming the habit} pain of relieving the anxiety or suffer the pain of the anxiety.
Posted 1/2/2014 4:04 PM (GMT 0)
Never heard that one before Sonny, I like it!
Posted 1/2/2014 4:29 PM (GMT 0)
Sonny: I heard that "story" from another source only last week, it seems to me to be an excellent way of explaining stress!
Alf
Posted 1/2/2014 6:10 PM (GMT 0)
It's way easier for me to quote scripture like this, than to put it into practice in my own life, let alone offer it to someone who is facing the challenges you are. But the idea that "Worry is vanity" is another example of the word of God, as spoken by ancient people, is still being caught up to by sciences like psychology.

"For what profit comes to man from all the toil and anxiety of heart with which he has labored under the sun?
All his days sorrow and grief are his occupation; even at night his mind is not at rest.
This also is vanity."

Mikey
Posted 1/2/2014 10:46 PM (GMT 0)
Good article.
I heard once that worry is like a rocking chair; it gives you something to do but you don't get anywhere.

I'm trading in my "rocking chair" on a Lazy-Boy recliner with cup holders!! Gonna make some changes... :)

Post Edited (Redwing57) : 1/2/2014 3:53:06 PM (GMT-7)

Posted 1/2/2014 11:08 PM (GMT 0)
I never worry, I quit doing that after taking a college course in logic.
You can either spend your time worrying or spend you time fixing the problem.
I know I've done everything I can to fix the problem.
Posted 1/2/2014 11:11 PM (GMT 0)
Worry is letting our imagined troubles live rent-free in our heads. 90 % of the time our worries never materialize. It's that other 10 % of our worries that we need to worry about.
Posted 1/3/2014 12:59 AM (GMT 0)
I like that Sonny. Ill try to remember it…Divo
Posted 1/3/2014 1:07 AM (GMT 0)
As a follow up on my thread, a good piece on concern vs. worry, some good advice here, imo:

www.ascentadvising.com/?p=58

(still don't know how to make it live if anyone wants to help)

I think I fixed your link. -- PeterDA

Post Edited By Moderator (PeterDisAbelard.) : 1/3/2014 8:41:22 AM (GMT-7)

Posted 1/3/2014 2:55 AM (GMT 0)
To make the link "live", put "[url]" in front of the link, and "[/url]" after it. Leave a space, and those are square brackets.

Edit: that didn't work; the forum software actually used the html I was trying to show.

Hmmm.... trying again... put {url} in front of the link, and {/url} after it, except replace the curly brackets with square brackets.

Made your example work using a horrible hack. Caution: the hack needs to be re-entered every time this comment is saved. If you edit it again without re-entering the hack the problem will come back. -- PeterDA

Post Edited By Moderator (PeterDisAbelard.) : 1/3/2014 8:51:13 AM (GMT-7)

Posted 1/3/2014 9:05 AM (GMT 0)
We all worry at times -- its normal. A little anxiety is also good.

So feel anxious and worry a little then rest! The trick is to make the REST periods between your worries and anxiety much longer.
Posted 1/3/2014 2:40 PM (GMT 0)
redwing: good tip, but still don't get it.

Perhaps someone can take my link and make it live for me, the article is well worth the trouble. Thanks.

David
------------------------------

Off this morning to have the brain MRI. I thought it would be a quickie, but was told it will take at least an hour, with my head locked in place in a cage of thought. Joys. Was not able to find anyone to go with me, so hope I feel ok when its over with.
Posted 1/3/2014 3:34 PM (GMT 0)
David
My wife had to have one of head scans too. She said while it's not a joy, it wasn't too bad either. Good luck.
Posted 1/3/2014 3:52 PM (GMT 0)
Great post. I am a constant worrier....Helpful tips here.
Posted 1/4/2014 1:50 AM (GMT 0)
if we didn't worry we'd be extinct as a species. for those of you who have an on and off switch more power to you.

ed
Posted 1/4/2014 5:27 PM (GMT 0)
Well said, Ed.

My off switch is called going to work/keeping busy.

Mel
Posted 1/4/2014 9:49 PM (GMT 0)
I come from a long line of worriers. I hesitate to discuss my anxieties and fears because so many here have it worse.

I am working on "faith" issues and trying not to borrow trouble by worrying on things that I can not change.
Great post!

Paul
Posted 1/4/2014 10:05 PM (GMT 0)
Guess it depends on which definition of worry you use:

"To subject to persistent or nagging attention or effort" is to worry

"To change the position of or adjust" is to worry

"To bother or to annoy" is to worry

"A state or feeling of anxiety" is to worry

I think that just about every one of us has "worried" in one form or another.
Posted 1/5/2014 1:03 AM (GMT 0)
Loved the post David, and also the links, I did get them, and copied them to send to friends. You are the best…You are using your life in such a good way. I hope the MRI wasn't too bad. Pete has to have one on Monday. What Me Worry?? How about those old "MAD" magazines!! xxDi
Posted 1/5/2014 1:54 AM (GMT 0)
I never know if I worry too much or too little. Sometimes I worry about how much I worry.
Posted 1/6/2014 5:50 PM (GMT 0)
I am a worry-wart (as my daughter said). I am a constant worrier and would love to change. Thank you for the article!
Posted 1/7/2014 12:17 AM (GMT 0)
No problem, Aimzee, I felt it was a topic that many here have to deal with.

Give my best to Ron, I always remember him daily.

David
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