Sorry to read your post and see the problems you have been dealing with. I am not paraplegic so I can't help you there but I just got a AMS 800 AUS installed in April and will try to tell you what I know of an AUS.
1) I understand that a small percentage of patients may have some erosion issues. I haven't. But that can be corrected. At least one of our forum members had that problem and he will probably show up here soon to help you.
2) about
the cuff, I still leak a little when I squat, throw something, stand up quickly but I never use more than a thin pad a day.
3) You should never insert a catheter when you have an AUS until you de-activate it. The doctor can teach you how to de-activate it. It only takes a minute.
An AMS800 AUS is the "Gold Standard" for helping men end incontinence. I went from 3-5 pads a day to 1 thin pad. The success rate is in the 90+% range. It starts working 6 weeks after it is installed, problem solved.
Almost everyone I have heard of who has had an AUS installed is very happy with it and would do it again, only sooner, if they had the chance.
You have a lot going on in your life. It sounds like a great solution to improve your quality of life. Talk to your doctor or a urologist who has done many AUS surgeries to see if it is something that could work for you.
I hope I helped in some way. My AUS brothers will be showing up soon to support you in any way they can.
Take care of yourself brother
Bill from Florida