Caregivers Corner, Treatments for Advanced Disease, Results, Side Effects, etc. (Part 6)

So very sorry Cathy to hear that your husband has died as a result of Prostate Cancer. With heart felt sympathy to you at such a sad time. XOXO 💙 💙 💙

Cathy, so sorry to hear this sad news. Thinking of you and your family.
Beth

Cathy, very sorry for your loss.

Oh Cathy, I am so very sorry to hear about your DH's passing. I know it is some consolation to know that he is no longer suffering.
Take all the time you need to grieve, and it does take time. Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Renee

Cathy dear,
You have been such a great inspiration and comfort to myself and the others here on the forum. You are in my prayers for comfort and strength for yourself as you have so freely given others. When I read of you husband's passing, I reread his signature hx, and what a very painful ordeal he and you went through. So sorry you both had that pain, and so sorry you have lost your DH to this awful disease. Please do check in and let us know how your doing, love.
Beth

Dear Cathy,
I just checked in and learned the sad news of your husband's passing. I am so sorry for your loss. You have been so strong for your husband (and for everyone here). I hope you will look after yourself now and that you have people you can lean on at this time. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family - Suzanne

I've never seen him like this before, Susan. Like a sparrow that has been caught by a cat and it just hanging in there for a few more moments. It's awful. Sad. I just can't begin to describe how ill I feel inside. But I must be brave and carry on hoping.

Also, the palliative home care nurse visits once a WEEK. Like no help at all. Nothing. I asked if she could take the blood for a crossmatch and they don't do that so I have to try to haul him into the car and get him to the hospital for that and then again on Friday if he needs blood.

Antonia,
Your description of a tiny sparrow is so apt. Gary also seems to be growing frail and tiny, with sad, runny eyes, but still fighting to do everything he can manage every day.
Monday I fell and broke my wrist on my dominant right hand. Really did damage, compound fracture.
I was released from the hospital today, and as soon as we got home Gary threw up all over himself and the bathroom.
I found out today that cancer does not give you a break. You just learn to cope and try not to scream.
I continue to send vibes and prayers your way, Antonia, for the strength you need and earth angels to assist.

First, Happy Thanksgiving to our American friends! I am FUMING here with the insanity of the system. My poor guy is so weak and confused as to what is happening to him. He feels he should be getting better as his mind is telling him he is, but his body isn't cooperating. That is how he explained it to me. I am calling one of the similarly confused nurses at the hospital today - the one who is supposed to be in charge of home care coordination. She will no doubt tell me that her only responsibility is to deal with the transition from hospital palliative to home care palliative. It is freezing cold and I somehow have to get Don out of the house, down two steps, along an upward slope and up two more steps to the garage. I am looking around to see if there is a private ambulance service as it has to be done as early as possible for the cross match. Then his appointment for blood is at 9 am tomorrow so same thing.

My g/f is a retired nurse familiar with cancer care and she says that this is all pure insanity, that blood services should be coming to the home to draw the blood for a cross match. I asked the hospital this and they said they don't provide that service.

Beth, your poor wrist! And I can only imagine how awful it was when poor Gary was sick over himself. We have had the same with the other end. That was back yesterday after a smoothie, so at least I have a clue. Unfortunately, there is no other way to get calories into him. He cannot process protein of course, thanks to the cachexia, and so this is why he has no muscles to even turn himself over in bed. Just a month ago, we were walking around on a mini-vacation, slowly but at least able. Yesterday, I managed to get his usual breakfast of almond butter on toast and a banana down him. Our daughter came home in her lunch half-hour to feed him scrambled eggs on toast, while I shot out to pick up some food. Her restaurant made him salmon fish and yam fries for dinner (his favourite) but the returning diarrhea had made him very weak. He ate it though but said he had stomach pains afterwards. At least some food is going down.

Sue, thank you for your kind words as well. The palliative doc thinks that Don is less than two weeks but we still don't get any blankety-blank help. By the way, I never thought I could swear as much as I have lately. And I used to be so lady-like... Love to you all and to your guys as well. xoxox Moon

Don has passed. It was peaceful and as lovely as it could have been with no pain. He drifted off to sleep. Three times he shouted shortly before leaving which I think was his way of saying I love you. My heart is broken into a million pieces. He was the kindest man on the planet, a lot of fun and my true soul mate.
Thank you everyone for holding me up with your kind messages and emails. XXX

So sorry to hear this, moon. You did everything psosible to help him, and he is lucky to have had you as his advocate. No doubt he is looking down on you now, thinking how great it was to have you by his side.
I hope you can find solace in that.

Thank you Beth and Pratoman. Your words comfort. Mel, you have been a rock for us on and off the forum. I miss him so terribly much. He was such a kind and gentle man and we absolutely adored each other. I bear those people no malice. They aren't worth the effort.