Hi, and welcome to our forum. You will find a lot of people here that are supportive, as you've already seen on this thread. Please stay with us, ask, vent, whine, complain, whatever you need. We're here for you!
As a fellow G9 5+4, I know the dark corner of the PCa universe we occupy. We have a thread for G9 folks, meant as a gathering place for those facing this diagnosis. If your glance through it (and the prior one that grew too long for the system, linked in it), you'll find many G9 folks and many that are doing well.
It's great that your husband has had such a good, long, remission with surgery only. It is unusual to have such success with the quite aggressive beast that a 5+4 case is. When considering my treatment options with a fairly similar diagnosis, I ended up going with radiation and hormone therapy as my primary treatment. Radiation was not too tough, it's more of an endurance contest, a marathon, but hormone therapy is a hard long road.
Here's a link to our G9 Crew thread, and I've added you to the rather smaller 5+4 group, and one of the earliest diagnosed that's on the list. Your husband is lucky to have you supporting him through all of this!
www.healingwell.com/community/default.aspx?f=35&m=3182035&g=3182504#m3182504All the best to you as you consider what the next steps are.