Posted 2/24/2016 1:21 AM (GMT 0)
Hello Fellows,
Yes --- I believe in the friend-to-friend, man-to-man, conversations that advocate to others about the importance of early testing and due diligence when it comes to prostate cancer and men's health ... some events in my life have led to a unique perspective, but some subsequent events have ALSO led to special opportunities to share the word with others. I hope that within my words, you will find something that resonates with you or spurs a positive course of action or a conversation that could help someone that you know ...
For years, there has been a public service commercial on television that states: "Be A MAN --- GO To The DOCTOR." Although I hope that commercial is reaching someone out there, I think direct conversations are much MORE effective --- and I have living proof of that since my diagnosis ...
Truth be told, if we're being honest, I think women do a better job of networking with each other on health issues ... but I see evidence that men ARE beginning to step up to the plate more ... and this forum is a prime example of that in action, each and every day. Keep reaching out to others, fellows !
In my lifetime, my maternal grandfather, then my father, and now I have all been diagnosed with prostate cancer. I realize I represent the third generation of my family to be diagnosed with prostate cancer and that realization leaves me determined to reach out to others in this situation. Basically, my family has been dealing with prostate cancer over the course of 40 years, these past three generations ... and now it's been my turn to walk onto the battlefield. If I think about things from my mother's point of view: her father (my grandfather), then her husband (my father), and now me ... her oldest son ... have ALL been diagnosed with prostate cancer. This gives me a unique perspective, based on my family's history ...
Growing up in the 1970s , I visited my grandfather every single day after he was diagnosed with advanced prostate cancer. There were NO treatments offered to him ... there were no ADT shots available then ... no chemotherapy treatments like Taxotere were approved ... no breakthrough medications like ZYTIGA, XTANDI, or XOFIGO had been discovered yet ... and the PSA test wasn't even heard of then. My grandfather lasted just a few months ... we had one last Christmas together, and then he was gone ... right before my eyes.
I often wonder today about the treatments that have helped me now, 40 years later ... the life-extending advances that have emerged in very recent times, with the promise of more treatments coming around the bend as we speak ... and I truly wonder how these treatments could have impacted my grandfather's life ... which has always left me very determined to pursue every treatment possible, remembering HIS fighting spirit. He was a full-blooded Scandinavian and he fought like a Viking warrior ... but no medical "swords & shields" were offered to him as he entered the battlefield, in terms of treatments. I owe it to my grandfather to keep fighting ... to be mindful of others in this battle ... and to do what I can to reach out to others I know in this battle ...
These days, my dad and I have worked TOGETHER as a team, both of us now diagnosed with prostate cancer --- we know everyone back in my hometown and between both of us, we know almost everyone in the surrounding towns across the county, as well --- since Dad and I are BOTH prostate cancer patients, our story has reached a WIDE range of people that we know --- word-of-mouth, downtown coffee shop conversation --- father and son BOTH now diagnosed and engaged in the battle together --- and our story is able to impact a wider range of fellows, since we represent two different generations. I travel to my hometown about once a month, and together Dad and I have shared our story first-hand with other fellows in countless ways --- at the barber shop, the church gatherings, the cafes & restaurants, the coffee shops, the sporting events, the local pubs, the country club at the golf course, the high school class reunions, the 4th of July celebrations in my hometown, and on the streets of town ---
In my mind, I call this a "handshake campaign" because each conversation that Dad and I have with all of these fellows begins and ends with a handshake, signaling years of friendship ... and having a father and son sharing the story TOGETHER is pretty powerful ... and my dad and I have an incredible bond in all of this, beyond all words to describe. We BOTH are inspired by my grandfather's fighting spirit, all these years later, and the imprint it left upon both of us ...
Since then, friends of ours HAVE gone to the doctor after talking with Dad and with me ... and SEVERAL of our friends have since been diagnosed with prostate cancer and are now pursuing active treatments. Frankly, it's sobering to have a friend of yours receive a prostate cancer diagnosis, but it's GRATIFYING when they start pursuing the treatments that might save their life. Cancer IS out there, my friends ... and one of YOUR friends or colleagues or neighbors or classmates or golfing partners or poker club buddies probably has it right now, and they don't even know it. Prostate cancer has been described as a silent, but potentially deadly intruder. Almost all of us have this common thread in our story and here are our words: "I'd been healthy my entire life, until the day I received my unexpected diagnosis." I guess my heartfelt message is this ... find your VOICE and help get the word out to your friends, colleagues, and community members ... in whatever way you can do so ...
On my own, one-by-one, I've had the man-to-man family conversations with my younger brother, my male cousins who all grew up with me, my uncles, and even my six nephews who are all growing up --- all the males relatives in my entire family. Based on family history, they NEED to pay careful attention to their health, going forward. I feel even closer to all of them after having that conversation ...
In my own life, I now have five or six direct friends who have been diagnosed with prostate cancer. We're all about the same age, and I've got a tight bond of friendship with each one of them ... friends from my hometown, my old college roommate, a work connection colleague, and community friends --- diagnosed after they heard my story and went to the doctor. One night, my old college roommate called me and said, "I don't know how to tell you this, but after I went to the doctor at your urging, I just found out I'm in your same boat now ... I just got diagnosed with prostate cancer." True story ... we've been friends for DECADES ... I was best man at his wedding ... he's like a brother to me ... now BROTHERHOOD has an even deeper meaning.
Another testimonial about the importance of the conversations that we can have with other fellows ... when I was first diagnosed, one of my best friends would check on me when I was going through chemo treatments, just out of friendship and support. One day my friend asked me, "Is there ANYTHING I can do for you?" I replied and said, "Yes, actually ... there IS something ... would you do me a big favor ... and just have your PSA checked, since you have always been a friend to me through the years ... you've got a wife and young children at home to think about." Sure enough, in due time ... he got the news ... he has now also been diagnosed with advanced prostate cancer, and had lived a life of perfect health and fitness. Now our bond of friendship is even tighter, and we are "Battle Brothers" alongside each other ... again, a friend who has always been like a brother to me ...
Together, my "Battle Brothers" and I have found ways meaningful ways to spread the word to others in the community --- we've shared our stories with our male work colleagues .... with our female work colleagues with husbands at home ... with entire church congregations ... and at community events ... and we're still finding new ways to share our stories, in the interest of getting others to take a more proactive approach with their health, with special emphasis on the importance of knowing about the impact of prostate cancer in men's health. Meanwhile, the handshakes and conversations continue ...
Just some thoughts and reflections, based on my life experiences,
"Cyclone Fan" From Iowa State