4 weeks after surgery/19 days after catheter out/ leakage still a problem

It takes time.

Hang in there, before you know it this will be just a bad memory.

Andrew

Yep, 4 weeks is nothing. Sounds like you are doing about normal, or at least no worse than I was. The frustrating thing about this business(as if there is only one) is that some guys are just going to be dry or almost dry from the time the catheter comes out. But they are a rarity, I'm fairly sure.

Others, also somewhat rare I suppose, are never going to be as dry as they want to be until they have additional surgery, and a very few may not be 100%(but close) even then.

Then there are the rest, wet to varying degrees for from one to 18 months, but who finally get either dry or dry enough to deal with it without too much mental distress. And for me I found it very distressing to know that I would not know which category I was in until either I was dry one day, or 18 months had past. Then if I was still wet I could sign up with the surgeon for another go. One guy here was wet for over a year, and then one day he was dry!

And at 2 months and then 3 and 4, I just did not see how I was not going to be getting some more surgery, because I knew I was not willing to live that way if anything could be done about it. And at 14 months I still have that possibility on the back burner, even though I am finally vastly better. Probably I can live with this, most nights when I remove the shield I wore all day it is not wet enough to notice, maybe it would even be hard to weigh. IOW, it usually seems dry. I PROBABLY won't subject myself to another surgery if it stays this good and/or does not get worse.

But, I am still not what I would call continent. This morning while still in my PJs, I took a deep breath or said a slightly louder word and boomshakalaka before I even knew it had happened I squirted out a quarter sized wet spot. Not a huge deal, not even enough to make me change pants(I usually don't wear a pad around the house in the morning or at night), but still, who would choose to deal even with that? Plus that sort of thing means I still need to wear a pad just in case, plus it's something I still need to pay attention to and think about and be careful about. But compared to 2 or 3 or maybe 4 months out when I pee'ed myself silly if I was standing up? I have it made compared to that.

But it took many months of healing, and I don't think Kegels made all that much difference(hard to tell). Because I think I had fairly strong pelvic and sphincter muscles right off the bat. By Kegeling I could hold any load long enough to get to a toilet from day one, as long as I could get there in a reasonable time. But you can't "hold it" all day, it's going to tire out, and today I don't seem to have to. All I have to stop now are those little emergencies- I figure they are odd little spasms. Last May(3 months out) my son helped me move some new recliners in the house. I wet myself major, even though I was trying not to. Today(11 months later) he helped me move one back out to the truck to return it for some repairs. As I was typing this it dawned on me: despite this mornings minor accident, I don't think a drop escaped while moving that chair and lifting it into the truck. And I'm not sure I was paying much attention to preventing it, don't think I was. Sometimes on a 2 mile walk a few drops are spasm-ed out, sometimes the little paper towel I stick into the shield is dry even though I am mostly NOT consciously trying to prevent leaks while walking. Either way- a few drops or dry- that is so much better than filling a pad to the point of heaviness despite all my efforts otherwise, it feels heavenly.

So, hang in there. You might be OK tomorrow, or have several months of trial ahead of you, either way is common. Kegels or not, we all have to heal from various traumas and nerves have to be retrained from mostly voluntary to way more autonomic- the sphincter that is left is not used to that task- and bladders have to stop contracting(spasm) in response to the trauma they have been put through. And scar tissue must subside and sutures dissolve. You just have to heal and that can take time that varies greatly among us. Probably no way to know why for any individual, it just does. You can have an excellent surgeon, but there is still that luck of the draw thingie.

You are where I was at after 4 weeks. At 8 weeks I had switched to medium pads and could wear one all day. By 3 months I was finished. A 32oz Dunkin Donuts iced decaf was part of my day.
You write Depends. I hope you mean pads, not briefs. I wore Depends briefs home the day the catheter came out, never again.
After that I used Depends Guards pads in my Jockey briefs. Maximums and then switched to mediums. They fit in a pocket. You can replace them without removing your pants. Just snatch it out and put another one in. Never a leak or embarrassment. No one every knew. Here a year out I'm better than before the surgery. I piss like a race horse till I'm empty and since the sympathetic muscle controlled sphincter is gone I decide when to go, not it. It is nice on long flights or drive.

I used diapers then pads got 13 weeks. You're not out of the ordinary . Just roll with the punches.
Bob

You are doing well!
I found I did better when I drank water as my only beverage.
Hang in there. Check your progress weekly not daily.
Take care.

Hello Samster. Thanks for the encouraging post. I like the idea of checking progress on a weekly basis compared to daily like I'm doing. I lost my daily logins from two months back. I found them today and was delighted to see I'm doing about 30% better now. Each morning I start out with a 16 ounce cup of decaf. I'm going to cut that to every other day and make my drink of choice water. I've also scheduled an appointment with a physical therapist. I'm exhausting everything before I elect surgery.
Best Regards,
Jihn