From my heart, Katie/Infohound2…I am so sorry. Please know that Ted is resting comfortably in God’s hands now.
Most here have not experienced the loss of their spouse, their soul-mate. It is different than losing a parent a generation away, or a friend or acquaintance, and in other ways it is also different than—God forbid—the experience of losing a child. Your spouse is the person you have shared almost everything with through many happy and joyful and maybe some rocky years, but also the many steps big and small, forward and backward that most others don’t experience up close, day-after-day—unless you are the one that the buck stops with, as you were—through the late-stages of disease. I know; I’ve been right there with you through many of your experiences (having been at my wife's side through a 15-month losing battle following a diagnosis with advanced cancer).
Please allow me to say that I am greatly heartened to hear that your recent reading of
Being Mortal served you well through this time. Having myself been in your shoes, I knew the recommendation of this book would serve others well—even if the extent of the benefit was not realized for them until later. In your case, it was sooner rather than later. You will, no doubt, find opportunity—6-months, 12-months and more down the road—to “pay it forward” to others by both recommending this book, and also by sharing your experiences at appropriate times. It's too early for this now but you will also likely find, as I have amongst my neighbors and friends near and far, that as time goes by you will become the "go to" person with experience in dealing with the death of a spouse, and perhaps will be a beacon of light for others to emulate. The spirit of your participation here at HW/PC, and paying it forward, will be with you, I'm sure.
I’d echo the comment of 81GyGuy and encourage that you initiate a new thread updating your broader HW/PC family—it seems to me to be out-of-place for either of us to do. I think that this Book Club thread, by design, is
not widely read…and others will wish to send you their condolences.
My heart goes out…
Post Edited (JackH) : 3/1/2017 4:18:22 PM (GMT-7)