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Is lack of sex drive normal after prostate surgery???

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Posted 10/22/2017 2:42 AM (GMT 0)

prostate begone said...
"I know for a fact that my urine chemistry has changed. I have collected in bottles for ten years now,"

Does this mean what I think it means?

I was curious about that also! smilewinkgrin
Posted 10/22/2017 12:21 PM (GMT 0)
Billy I remember reading earlier that you posted this was a zombie thread after reading the last couple pages would have to agree with you! turn As I said earlier when you mess with Mother Nature both female and male doesn't matter it's gonna affect things whether it's physical or in your mind, the end result no matter how many times you dissect it is still the same. Things are different it's another factor in our life of prostate cancer, we may not want to accept it but reality is lots of things change how many of us guys now can't wait till Friday and Saturday are here so we can go out and tear up the town like we did when we were 18? Cripes remember when at 9:00 the nite was just starting? Now at 9 if I'm not in bed by 9 I'm late! Ha Ha

Larry
Posted 10/22/2017 2:15 PM (GMT 0)
Prostate_ begone, Billybob@388

The stuff is actually useful... for making gunpowder. In the old days Chinese and Japanese made one of the key components of gunpowder, potassium nitrate, by reacting pee with manure, leaves, and ash.
Here are Joseph Leconte's detailed instructions from 1862..

Enjoy!
Jeff
Posted 10/22/2017 8:46 PM (GMT 0)

Pratoman said...
I suspect a lot if this has to do with the natural aging process . For a lot of us.


That's going to be an increasing fractional contributor as age rolls on. At 58 (in a couple weeks), my sex drive has never felt stronger. (Science tells me it peaked in my teens, but I was nowhere near as "active" then, so maybe it's just that my libido "feels" strong now because it is coupled with a very satisfying love life.)



Skypilot56 said...
Now at 9 if I'm not in bed by 9 I'm late!


Same here! Hey, I’d like to pass on a tip to some of you guys who are voicing issues with “function.” Knowing that the "desire" and the "function" are two completely different things, I've learned a few things about maximizing the "function" in the 8 or so years since PC treatment. Wife and I set the daily morning alarm 30 minutes earlier than we want to actually get out of bed because the "function" is at it's best in the mornings! I like going to bed at 8:45 because then we'll often wake up 5 or 10 minutes before the alarm, which is even nicer! Hope this tip can help others, too.
yeah

Post Edited (NKinney) : 10/22/2017 4:21:41 PM (GMT-6)

Posted 10/23/2017 4:25 PM (GMT 0)
Opinion- would you be upset of your wife bought a Penis pump for you- this the wife and I did this- only because he’s too cheap to buy the pills the dr recommended and is doing nothing to remedy the horrible sex life this issue has brought us. I hope he doesn’t get insulted. We’ve talked about it in the past- he’s 65 and I’m 39 and I’m guessing maybe it’s an age hormone thing on top of the prostate issues- which was I think 2012- so is it hopeless to think that the damage has been done as far the use or loose it theory goes
Posted 10/23/2017 8:05 PM (GMT 0)

Sunny2012 said...
Opinion- would you be upset of your wife bought a Penis pump for you- this the wife and I did this- only because he’s too cheap to buy the pills the dr recommended and is doing nothing to remedy the horrible sex life this issue has brought us. I hope he doesn’t get insulted. We’ve talked about it in the past- he’s 65 and I’m 39 and I’m guessing maybe it’s an age hormone thing on top of the prostate issues- which was I think 2012- so is it hopeless to think that the damage has been done as far the use or loose it theory goes

Good for you! I think that's great. Talking about sex is an important part of owning your sexual health...and many men treated for PC have had their sexual health disrupted. So good for you stepping forward to work WITH your spouse to break-through any artificial barriers of communication. Most of us claim to want sex, and more of it, and sooner rather than later. So the reluctance to communicate about it remains puzzling.

The pump helps work on restoring the "function." "Desire" in not directly affected by first-line PC treatments.
I would also point out that there are generic, off-shore versions of the PDE-5 inhibitors (Viagra, Cialis, Levetra) available at a fraction of the cost of prescription meds in the US. I use a daily pill; I can't remember exactly right now, but to be best of my off-the -top-of-my-head memory it comes out to about $0.25/day. Affordable.
Posted 10/24/2017 3:55 AM (GMT 0)
Well it’s about the last straw for me- I have issued ultimatums and here we are years later so it’s on him and well it’s on me to do better job of pressing the issue or making the first move versus staying hot and bothered about it silently. Swallow the pride. I think he was getting some cheaper pills via the mail somehow. His dr recommended them and they were just fine. Do share if you think of the names and wish me luck.
Posted 10/24/2017 2:42 PM (GMT 0)
I really think that I would want to stack the odds in my favor for success. After giving all the normal caveats (everybody is different, I'm not a doctor, etc., etc., blah, blah), my personal guess is that a pump by itself isn't going to be enough. Now to be clear, I've not personally used a pump, but it largely automates a step that could also be primarily accomplished by hand. It is reported that the repeated effort(s) are important to restore more normal blood flow.

To stack the odds, consider combining the pills and the pump activity...and in fact, as per my earlier posting, be sure to try that activity in the mornings to really stack the odds favorably. I agree that the prescription pills from Walgreens/CVS are too expensive, but you indicated he had already previously gotten some offshore generics. If it were me, I'd try them again...and make sure to have patience to try and try again. Small steps of improvement are what you want to see. Be patient, but don't give up until without trying the things which are more likely to work.

I use All Day Chemist online for affordable generic tadalafil (Cialis).
Posted 10/24/2017 6:35 PM (GMT 0)
Cruel irony for me. Ed is absolutely no problem but will never need. But completely incontinent. If I could I would trade any day if the week
Posted 10/24/2017 8:30 PM (GMT 0)
Ron42661,
Go to a mirror right now! Do it! I'll wait.....
Now, put your face about a foot from the glass and repeat after me:
"Incontinence can be fixed!" "Incontinence can be fixed!" "It. Can. Be. Fixed!"
Just do it! Your life will be so much better.

(And if you're not using the equipment can I borrow it? Eight years ago I had both nerves removed and I still miss it every day. )

Jeff
Posted 10/24/2017 8:36 PM (GMT 0)
If I could give it to you I would gladly hand it over to someone who could get use out of it. May be fixable but right now have to wait it out per doctor.
Posted 10/24/2017 8:42 PM (GMT 0)
Don't wait too long! Very few guys regain continence naturally after a year. Take data to determine your leak rate. That will be important for deciding which way to go for the next step.
Don't let a plumbing problem ruin your life. It. Can. Be. Fixed!

I'd be happy with even once a month if you could pencil me in. smile
Posted 10/30/2017 4:21 AM (GMT 0)
Worried guy;; Have you used bimix or trimix? Why does equip not work? My dad did an implant and had another good 10 years after 75. I have my bimix that works with tinkering. Really boosts my confidence to get wood like the old days. I am a new man now even if it takes tinkering to get there.
Posted 11/26/2017 11:18 PM (GMT 0)
I am 12+ months after RP and I always had good strong libido bu my problem is I lost my tool. It is totally non usable. TRIMIX gives me erection in 7/10 attempts but size of my erect penis is not usable for penetration. I have size like when I was 10.
I regained 99% continence with still stress incontinece present but that I something I can li live with.
I did aggressive penile rehab using Cialis and Viagra with no success. VED never produced usable erection. Started TRIMIX at 5 1/2 months with injection already 65 times.
With non existent penis, I will not be candidate for implant.
Orgasms are another disappointment. Non existent.
Probably, four to five of us here could make ONE USABLE MAN.
MK
Posted 12/4/2017 12:48 PM (GMT 0)
It has been almost 10 years since I posted this thread and here is my update. I am 67 now and I can still get rock solid erections if I have manual stimulation. The mental conection for getting erections just by thought , that has disappeared yeras ago after my surgery.

As to desire and libido, it is still a BIG FAT ZERO. I have been to endocrinologist afet endocrinologist and my testosterone alwats comes in at 350 to 400 , so the they won't prescribe shots and say this level of testosterona is normal for a man of may age. All the MDs continue to say my lack of lidido must be mental and not anything hormonal.

Still to this day, I think the prostate has something to do with libido. Like I said in the beging of this thread, The days before my surgery, I was getting erecctions just from looking at my partner naked, or just seeing a beuatiful woman on TV. Sex every night with my partner was a comon thing .

Two weeks after my surgery when my catheter came out, I felt nothing in desires. Big fat zero libido. NOTHING!!!

I could look at my wife naked 24/7 and I would feel no desires what so ever, and to this day it is the same. I have to force myself to have sex. Getting an ereccion is no problem, but getting the desires is just not happening.

No matter what people say, I still think the prostate produces some chemical that has something to do with libido.
Posted 12/4/2017 2:43 PM (GMT 0)

NY-Sooner said...

No matter what people say, I still think the prostate produces some chemical that has something to do with libido.

Well, allllrighty then, Dr Sooner.


We may have some new, never-before discovered science here, but I'd suggest that you stop punishing yourself, take your endocrinologist report and go to a therapist. You are describing well-understood problems that they can help you with in ways other than you continuing to self-placate when you are all alone with a Playboy or your online pages (which, btw, isn't helping the root cause of your issues or your relationship; maybe making both unnecessarily worse).

Post Edited (NKinney) : 12/4/2017 10:57:44 AM (GMT-7)

Posted 12/4/2017 3:40 PM (GMT 0)
The recent posts on this topic are interesting.

I'm about 14 months post surgery. I am fully continent, but still have ED issues. I get a response from the drugs, but not enough for intercourse. Orgasms, when they happen, are less intense than before.
I sense some return of the nerves, but nothing that consistent yet.

I've seen a specialist in ED, and he thinks my progress is normal. He says, in his experience, the mean time for a PC surgery patient to regain healthy nerves is two years.

However, I have a real decrease in libido. I mentioned that to the doctor, and he nodded but had nothing to say. I have not had my testosterone level checked. Like others here have said, prior to surgery I could get aroused easier than now. I wonder if it is fear of failure. I've read that fear has a negative effect on the erection process.

Anyway, the lack of desire puzzles me. My wife is understanding and there is no issue there. But I'm sort of searching for a clue to a healthier libido.
Posted 12/4/2017 3:48 PM (GMT 0)

tennisplayer said...
I wonder if it is fear of failure. I've read that fear has a negative effect on the erection process.


Bingo!

If you've got a decent level of testosterone, then it's not "some chemical" which your surgeon dropped into your empty prostate bed before closing...or was sprayed into the water by aliens just before the so-called lunar landing, or into Lee Harvey Oswald's drink by Illuminati, etc

Post Edited (NKinney) : 12/4/2017 9:02:38 AM (GMT-7)

Posted 12/4/2017 4:57 PM (GMT 0)
NKinney-

Thanks for confirming what I've surmised. I've read that adrenaline will interrupt the erection process, and fear triggers an increase in adrenaline.

I like your suggestion of therapy.
Posted 12/4/2017 5:09 PM (GMT 0)
Building upon my earlier comment(s)...

Good article by the Clinical Director of the Center for Healthy Sex (incidentally located in the Betty Ford Center in LA). She wrote this article from the woman's perspective, so be sure to get properly oriented. For example:
    For men, struggling with ED is like getting stuck with a bad song on repeat, continuously reiterating all of his worst nightmares about himself and his manhood. This ongoing loop of negativity becomes all he can focus on, isolating him in a black cloud of his thoughts. At this point, you could be Angelina Jolie in a negligee, but if he is in the throes of his ED, he’ll be too wrapped up in his destructive thinking to notice. [Sound familiar, NY-Sooner? You wrote: "I could look at my wife naked 24/7 and I would feel no desires what so ever."] While the original loss of his erection was most likely due to one of the above factors, his anxiety is now running the show, further preventing him from getting or being able to keep his erection.


Erectile Dysfunction: Why it May Be a Sign that He Really is into You

Post Edited (NKinney) : 12/5/2017 9:56:52 AM (GMT-7)

Posted 12/4/2017 5:40 PM (GMT 0)
The male sexual response reflects a dynamic balance between exciting and inhibiting forces of the autonomic nervous system within the penis and throughout the CNS.
(1) The sympathetic component tends to inhibit erections, whereas the parasympathetic system is one of several excitatory pathways.
(2) During arousal, excitatory signals can originate in the brain, either by the sight or thought of an appealing sexual partner or by physical genital stimulation.
(3) Regardless of the source of these signals, the excitatory nerves in the penis respond by releasing proerectile neurotransmitters such as nitric oxide and acetylcholine. These chemical messengers signal the smooth muscles of the penile arteries to relax and fill with blood, resulting in an erection.

No (1) is why fear isn't good when we try to have sex. Fear is part of the sympathetic system.
No (2) indicates that the problem is psychological if works with manual stimulation but not with sight.
Posted 12/6/2017 7:30 PM (GMT 0)
NY-Sooner,

Hopefully you've followed-up on looking into getting some therapy. If not, you can use THIS AASECT LINK; click on "Locate a Professional."

The therapists say that in a case of hypoactive (low) sexual desire "the worst thing one can do is to give up on sex."

In fact, time is working against you. One therapist writes:
    Sex is like exercise. If you haven't exercised for a long time and you're out of shape, your first day back at the gym may be hell. It won't feel good and it will be hard. But if you ignore your resistance and keep working out, your body will kick back into gear. After a while, you'll start to feel really good. Sex operates the same way. If you haven't been sexual for a while, it will be hard to get going again. But once you get those feel-good endorphins kicked back in, you'll be glad you stayed with it. LINK

Your relationship will thank you for following up.
Posted 4/30/2018 2:43 AM (GMT 0)
Hello Sir,

I am experiencing the same lack of sex drive. Prostatectomy performed Dec 7, 2016, I have been at zero since. I can reach full erections and periodically have early morning erections. This experience is very difficult and lonely. Just so happened to Google for help or read related articles and your post from 2009 was a bullseye hit square on my forehead or should I say “No Sex Drive”. I have been married 28 years - 29 come Sept 1. This weekend was my first time ever communicating it to my wife or trying to communicate the actual feeling of zero sex interest. Although I can reach an erection, I have not penetrated my wife since surgery

I found your latest post as of Dec 2017, thanks for your insight at least I will read through and hope to try a different approach in HOPE!

Veteran

Post Edited (Liamsameach) : 4/29/2018 8:49:43 PM (GMT-6)

Posted 4/30/2018 4:57 AM (GMT 0)
I had a lot of sex drive before and since RP. ALL my nerves were removed and I am still horney. Had an implant because injections started pyronies , scaring and a bend in my dick. Healing from implant 12 days ago. Yesterday I was so horney that I felt like my whole body was a big solid dick. My orgasms are so intense that I shake all over. Sorry to hear about your libido failure. We are all different.
Posted 4/30/2018 5:55 PM (GMT 0)

oldbeek said...
Yesterday I was so horney that I felt like my whole body was a big solid dick.


Yikes!

That's troubling.

Post Edited (NKinney) : 4/30/2018 12:05:39 PM (GMT-6)

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