Pasayten journey... post-op DaVinci

Just to keep things up to date...

Doctor said to start the viagra therapy after about week of catheter removal...

Try number 1 Tuesday 5/8 with 50mg Viagra did absolutely nothing...

Try number 2 today 5/10 had better results... Maybe a 20% erection, but not hard enough for penetration.
Interesting though and thankfully that I have a loving, caring, and understanding wife... I actually was able to slightly insert with some help and after a short while of normal sexual stimulation, I actually had the twinge of a small but pleasant climax... At least some of the old nerves still seem to work. Hopefully better erections will follow... I am happy with this phase of the recovery

Ray & Avis

(Originally post to Swimom's ED thread)

Hello All,

Figured I would post my ED status so far... This is somewhat graphic in nature, but honest... and I found that it has helped me immensely in my worries about this part of the recovery.

At around 3 weeks post DaVinci (had 4/24), and after taking a 50mg Viagra (2 weeks), I was getting about a 20% erection. Using my fingers to make a "ring" and starting at the base and moving up, we could get about 2 -2 1/2 inches of somewhat firm erection. This along with some creative positioning with my very understanding wife was enough for some minimal insertion... just enough for a pleasant feeling and some nerve memory stimulation at the end. Not much, but something.

Now at 4 1/2 weeks, we are getting slightly more erection... about 30%. Once again, with fingers, could get about 3 inches firm the end. Enough for somewhat better insertion. This time, after insertion, the base remained firm enough (even though the tip got soft) for a little more in/out stimulation for both parties. This is the first time we didn't have to work so hard at "parting". The position that is working for us is that we are both on the bottom, but like an "x" to each other... where I straddle one of her legs and she hold the other one up and above me a little. This seems to give max amount of entry and easier ability to have fingers help with initial insertion. Still not enough erection for traditional positions, at least with our particular body geometries for which we all differ.

No real climaxes for me yet, but that is complicated by the fact that I have been taking Lexapro (an anti-deprssion SSRI) for the last 6 months and a side effect for me was delayed ejaculation (pre-op -- and that was a side effect we BOTH liked ), so I am not suprised now with the less than normal erection, position, and level of activity. I may try a Lexapro "vacation" (skip med for a day or two) and try that to see what happens.... This first time we tried sex at 1 1/2 weeks, I did get a little climax that was pleasant, but that was after a day I forgot to take my Lexapro.

Thanks you all that post to this forum as reading about everybody else's recovery experiences from both the male and female viewpoints are invaluable to the mindsets of Avis and myself and the resultant worries about this jouney we never expected to be on!

Ray & Avis

Hi Ray (and Avis),

Thanks for the updates on erectile function and continence.  Always great to hear how other's are progressing on these issues. 

On erectile function, I think you guys are doing great so far!  (from our perspective).  I was on anti-depressants for a while a few years back, and paxil just killed my sex life with a total inablity to orgasm, even taking a drug holiday every once in a while, as doc suggested. (I eventually switched to Effexor XR which didn't have that side effect for me). 

That is good if you could orgasm before on Lexapro, even if delayed.  I would imagine you should be able to get back to that point, if it worked before.  Probably will just take time?  It is hard finding an anti-depressant with a good effect on one's chemical imblance and with tolerable side effects.  So hope it continues to work for you!

On the continence, every improvement is a blessing and cause for celebration!  You definitely are making progress, and i bet in about three weeks or so you will be pad free or almost pad free :)  Ken is going pad free about the house at now six weeks post-catheter, but he does have to concentrate on it when getting up, bending over etc.

Continued positive thoughts and best wishes on your recovery!  Say "hi" to Avis :)

Tanya (and Ken)

Hello All,

 

Been awhile since I have updated our journey...  I am now 9 weeks post-op DaVinci.

 

Physical Aches/Pains:

 

Very minimal if any...  just a minor "inside ache" during end of bowel movement... At the release of pressure.  Has gotten less over the last month.

 

ED:

 

Has continued slow progress but satisfactory...  Still at 50mg Viagra 3 times a week... I figure about a 40% erection and with hand holding for insertion, was good enough last time for a small but pleasant climax...  With Viagra at $11 for a 100mg pill and not covered by insurance, I have purchased some Caverta at $2/pill...  Will post results after a week or so of comparison.

 

Incontinence:

 

 Biggest change and why I posted!  I have always been able to sleep dry and be mostly dry when sitting...  Leaked like a sieve when walking...   Over the month, it improved a little in that I was able to hold about 2-4 oz. of pee while walking before leaking like a sieve. Was still frustrating for me... 

 

The last two weeks were spent working on our Winthrop house project putting in plumbing...   going up/down ladders, stairs, and climbing around the rafters...  leaked like a fountain...  5-6 pads a day...  even changed one while at the top of a 12 foot ladder...   BTW, experimentation has proved to me that pads are kind of like cats...  when dropped from heights, they always land right side up... or in the case of a pad, plastic/dry side down...  3 for 3 on this...

 

Anyway, after coming back to our regular Monroe house, the next day I noticed that I was quite dry the whole day...  Only 2 pads and minor soaked...  Like this was overnite!!   Anyway, still keeping at this level for the last 3 days...  Yahooooo!     Finally some significant progress...  Not in the impatient time frame I wanted, but still well within the usual statistics given... 

 

And the largest, most important change is that I have found this journey to really be a blessing...  God was near and faithful when I thought he was away and had abandoned me...

I have had a major leap in spiritual view from a worldly focus,  a greater closeness to God, and a greater compassion and love for people...  both for the many that have prayed for me, and the many that have given me words of support and care...  Especially from this site...

 

P.S. That's YOU who are reading this!

 

Love & God Bless,

 

Ray & Avis

Dear Ray & Avis, Wonderful update~~ and great news... I’m definitely not going under any ladders in the future!!   g iggle giggle Continue forward in your healing/recovery stepping-stone and stay close!!   Thank you for allowing us to walk with you ~ too!!! Hugs from Lee & Buddy Footprints Also Known As "I Had a Dream" One night I dreamed a dream. I was walking along the beach with my Lord. Across the dark sky flashed scenes from my life. For each scene, I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand, one belonging to me and one to my Lord. When the last scene of my life shot before me I looked back at the footprints in the sand. There was only one set of footprints. I realized that this was at the lowest and saddest times of my life. This always bothered me and I questioned the Lord about my dilemma. "Lord, You told me when I decided to follow You, You would walk and talk with me all the way. But I'm aware that during the most troublesome times of my life there is only one set of footprints. I just don't understand why, when I need You most, You leave me." He whispered, "My precious child, I love you and will never leave you, never, ever, during your trials and testings. When you saw only one set of footprints, It was then that I carried you." Margaret Fishback Powers, 1964