First Sneeze

In countenance recovery, I have been doing quite well and have no complaints but the first sneeze caught me by surprise. This is a little gentle warning for those that may have not sneezed yet since surgery.

It was one of those sneezes that came out of nowhere; a head jerker; a nostril spit’er. Full body involvement is what I am talking about. As quickly as the nose sneeze came, old Willy sneezed as well. A problem that has plagued our children bearing wives for years so it is really no big thing, just be prepared. They take it right in stride.

Men, if you have not sneezed yet, wear a little protection in public until you have passed this test.

Randy

I can relate to all of the above.  One evening, about three weeks out of my surgery, I told my wife that for once I was going to relax, without the pad and the jockeys etc., but be careful.  I was gonna leave my comfy pants on and just generally enjoy a night in front of the tube, letting it all hang out, so to speak.  I was wearing my PJ bottoms, my sneakers (with no socks) so I could walk outside, a loose tee shirt   -- life was good.

Till….

Just before lying down in front of the TV, I grabbed myself a short glass of water to take over to the end table next to my recliner.  BUT -- I made the BIG mistake of taking a quick swig of the water at the sink .

This "swig from hell" went down the wrong pipe, and created a coughing fit that opened the floodgates beyond anything I had ever experienced.  It felt like my urethra was ½ inch in diameter and pressurized!!  

It was like a deluge – going down my legs, into my sneaks -- I ran with towel in hand, to try and get to the bathroom and avoid any real serious damage control.

I guess it's funny in retrospect, because my friends still get a big kick out of hearing me tell that story.

I'm a real "pisser," they tell me.