psa angstiety, whats it all about for you?

logo, thanks for that post, it's right to the point. I didn't think I was the type to get PSA anxiety, and for the better part of a year after my surgery I didn't even think about it. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks, and I'm spending the better part of many days looking up data, papers, reading posts, and generally wasting time that I could spend on much more productive things.

My urologist told me not to worry about my PSA unless and until it hit 0.1. It's at 0.05 now. I can understand why he said that, since there is nothing he could do unless it was high enough to do something about it. And he doesn't want to be dealing with anxiety and head problems, that's for the shrink. So I'm left to deal with my own anxiety.

So why am I so anxious? I don't think it has to do with death -- heck, at my age of 66 I'm not sure I have 15 years ahead of me anyway. Like you, I think it's the hassle of having to go through so much research and doctors to figure out what the heck to do. It's not like a broken leg where they just put a cast on it, or even a heart attack where the fixes are fairly standard. With PC we have to worry about PSA level, doubling time, BCR, radiation, hormones, and even what we eat and drink. It's to the point where I can't even enjoy putting something in my mouth without worrying whether it's good or bad for me. And with PSA, there's always a "but." When the PSA is high, they say not to worry, it may not be cancer spreading. When it's low they say it doesn't mean you're free from cancer. It's a no win situation.

I know this board is not about spirituality, but the only thing that has helped me deal with this is my faith. I pray a lot that God knows why I'm going through this and will turn it to a good purpose.

i pray, have an extensive support network, exercise ... and take an SSRI.  i have no plans to change anything because i have almost zero anxiety most of the time unlike when i first started this journey.

ed

I have anxiety out the whazoo! Even though my Uro and Rad Onc were not discouraged about my first PSA after surgery(8 weeks 0.26 after 49.8 at surgery),it's driving me nuts! I think it's may be not knowing what my next test will be. Constantly hoping for the magical zero. Maybe because my journey is still rather young, I want to reach the golden ring,and don't know if I will.
Others on here who have not had those magical numbers on their first PSA will understand. We are extremely happy for those that do,and just as jealous! For me it's like wanting the big fishing boat when all I can afford is the blow up version,just isn't good enough.
Most of the time I'm a go with the flow kinda guy, but on some things I'm not and this is some thing that is basically out of my control. I've often said " If it doesn't affect me or my family, I really don't care." and this affect all of the above.

There's a 50/50 chance you're going to get BAD NEWS "AGAIN" on the same darn subject. OUCH.

I don't get any anxiety over PSA tests cause it's out of my control.  I know in advance I'll deal whatever life hands me.

And since I'm not all the found of lemonade - Bud Lite please.

 

No anxiety for me since I finished my treatment. Several reasons for this:
- I feel I made the right choice for myself...so no regrets
- Since I chose radiation, I expect some rise in PSA down the road...known as the bounce...so I don't sweat the tests
- I have come to believe that all forms of treatment bring some level of SEs and I will just have to deal with what comes
- And finally, I feel like I have already been cured of a serious disease before I had PC. Haven't had a drink since Jan 2, 1987....after a long love affair with alcohol. In my mind, I'm way ahead of the game and very thankful for the health I have at this point.

No matter what we do or think, none of us is guaranteed tomorrow. I'm just trying to enjoy today.

DaSlink , so, what?, clocknut your straight man. that was great!!!

This is an interesting thread.

However, keep in mind there is a difference between having a good pathology and a string of undetectables vs. having a bad pathology and a rising PSA.

We are all at different stages of this journey and hence some situations might be more anxiety-prone.

Additionally, it is very clear that we all react differently and handle stress differently.

An interesting sub-topic:

I have always been a self-starter and yet relaxed and able to handle stress quite well. In fact, I spent many years as a high school administrator and I was the point guy in dealing with obnoxious parents (we had a more genteel terminology for this, but you get the picture). In short, I've always been good at handling difficult situations. I've also been good at thinking ahead and anticipating situations (and having a plan in place to handle those situations).

Yet, I have found the current situation hard to handle. I'm sure it's due to that helpless feeling of events overtaking you. There is no clear path to this fight and we are at the mercy of the next PSA test. I might add that I have still been good at anticipating situations pertaining to this PC and having a plan in place.

So, my question to all of you is:

How good were you at handle high-stress situations in your previous life (ie: before PC) and did you find any differences in handling the PC situation.

not much anxiety for me anymore. that was not the case early on in this battle. i guess i was naive thinking in 2009 that rp would eliminate this problem. first post op psa was 0.02 which uro said is good but not what we were hoping for. anxiety went from 0 to 10 just that fast. two months later psa was 0.05 followed by rt. i've had three <0.1 results consecutively after rt. both uro and rad. onc agree that for me to be tested every six months instead of every three months is fine now. as time goes by anxiety seems less every day. in my mind i've made all the right decisions and if not, i can't take any back anyway. i guess like most of us i will always be a little anxious around test time though. the most effective tx for anxiety by far for me was deciding to trust my Savior with everything. hopefully i will see no rise ever or at least not for many years but this is not His plan then the only decision will be when to start ht or whatever the best tx at the time will be. once the curative bullets are used everything is pretty clear cut.

In my former life, I was able to handle stress pretty good. Being in charge of a group of guys, getting material ordered ,scheduling, and getting the job completed on time and within the budget, can be stressful work. Construction work is usually fast paced and quality can not and should not be sacrificed.Peoples lives depend on it. This kind of stress I handled well. Not to say that some times it can over whelm you, but there are things you can do to relieve that kind of stress. I haven't quite figured out a way to relieve PCa stress. If I get my bike back from the shop this week, and it ever quits raining, I can ride. Fishing season is now in full bloom! But the darn honey-do-list is keeping me down.

" Again the post was not if you have anxiety, but if you do, what is/are the personal specifics of " your " anxiety."

I haven't addressed this thread yet, because I don't really understand what answers you are looking for. You started this thread either the same day, or perhaps the day after, davidg started a thread that almost sounds the same as yours.

I might just be making it more difficult in my mind then what you are really asking. Both threads are about PSA anxiety, so again, trying to understand the difference or the thrust on your thread.

david in sc