Trying trying to stay positive but really pissed and second guessing the surgery.
One of the first things that we all learn the hard way is that there are no certainties in PCa. Unlike many cancers, there is no "absolute" or "tried and true" solution that fits everyone.
There is no reason to second guess the surgery. It is done. You have decisions to make about how to proceed that are much more important than thinking about what might have been.
Be positive because you want to be (and I will offer my opinion that you need to be, as things progress). We are all in that same boat, regardless of what our first treatment was. We want to be part of those large percentages of patients that our doctors told us do great.
I'm now at the HT decision point. Arguments for, arguments against. That debate is my priority now. Well, that and getting my taxes finished.