I have prostate cancer!

Peter! You laid it out to me....  and for that you will be blessed!  A decade wow?  This is the first time I’ve been on a form... I have been searching the web and getting information overload.... it would bring me up... then I would read something that would bring me down.  This is where I should have been right off the bat... You guys and gals are the veterans I should have turned to.  I needed some tough love and i got it here today!  i also got it from people who are afflicted from this cancer... it’s not the same when your brother, friends or coworkers say everything’s going to be ok..... That’s what we all said to those that had cancer before we were diagnosed.  Coming from you guys and gals gives me the best hope I’ve had since my diagnosis... again because it comes with experience and affliction!     Thank U!

Hey 49,
You are not alone, feel free to vent, rant, cry, or scream.
I know how you feel. I feel like doing it some days.
I don't have a lot to add... Just wanted to say hi.
All the best...

tooyoung4this   Yes... we are too young for this!  Yes... I’ve experienced all of those emotions in one conversation!   Thank U !

Hi 49
Sorry to be late to the party. I would like to point out a little truth to you and you can take it for what its worth. First of all not one person on God's green earth is guaranteed anything more than the breath we just exhaled. That said, I am sorry about your luck but get a grip. You are not going to die tomorrow and probably not for another 30 years. Positive margins suck. yep no doubt. I had positive margins 7 years ago when I was diagnosed with a P.S.A. of over 3200 and metastasis in my lungs, lymph nodes, and bones. They gave me a year or less. No surgery no radiation. Hormones were my only option. I am 49 now as well. I will dance at my 5 granddaughters weddings. My urologist told me 7 years ago that I got PCa. at the best time in history. I can name 15 or 20 drugs that are available now that weren't available a few years back and more are on the way. You are going to be okay. You are already in better shape then I was. You could get hit by a truck tomorrow. People hear cancer and do one of two things. They either step into the ring or dig a 6 ft. hole in the ground. Sounds like you gotta lot to fight for so I imagine you will be putting on the gloves. Go have a beer or glass of wine and watch the sun set or wake up early and watch it rise. Life is good so cook yourself up a t-bone steak and start living it.

49er,
Thanks for making me laugh from your comment about a "drill sergeant"..There are a lot of us that were straightened-up by drill sergeants..Keep your cool and welcome aboard a good ship--just a bump in the road but you will be fine..Peter said he was smart but he's the only one that ever said that. Send a post to 81GyGuy (the Lieutenant) and congratulate him on his ZERO psa test: he would appreciate it and when your turn comes we'll drink a beer on you...
All the best to you!!
Bill

49, you are so right about finding the right place here. These guys are the best, they will take care of you, you will always receive the best possible advice and deep compassion.
From my perspective (and I have been following this topic & research for over 2 yrs), you have done the first step, removing the tumor. Many have had undetectable PSA even without further action, so just relax. If your PSA happens to rise, believe me, there are MANY options, and let me emphasize many SMART options available that were not available a few yrs ago, that lead to cure.
Be happy and enjoy the fact that your cancer is localized, many younger and older men were not so lucky. With PC, one should never loose hope, and that for a good reason.

Sorry, I just saw you have positive margins.

That is a legitimate concern, but between modern medicine and a few prayers, I'm still betting you will be with us for quite some time.

Be sure to look both ways when crossing the street, don't smoke or drink to excess and wear your seatbelt and I bet PCa will not be the grim reaper.

49yrsold,
Can't really add much, except you can make it and many on here will help you make it with support, information, jokes, and yes a little tough love..... However, it's hard to be in your place with children, so much responsibility, loss; as one suggested, maybe a support group (my husband really appreciates his) or some medication to get you through the hump.

Also said - so many options, new treatments and medications now than when my husband started this journey at 49 almost 18 years ago and except for the last year and a half, he's done great. You will make it. Hugs and prayers. Extra hugs for your kids.

Yup, CT Umpire is right.

Don't worry too much about those positive margins. Sometimes they are completely meaningless and do not mean that some cancer was left behind.

In the style of CT, do NOT fear the purchase of any green bananas! :)

Chuck

Resident of Highland, Indiana just outside of Chicago, IL.
July 2011 local PSA lab reading 6.41 (from 4.1 in 2009). Mayo Clinic PSA Sept. 2011 was 5.7.
Local urologist DRE revealed significant BPH, but no lumps.
PCa Dx Aug. 2011 at age of 61.
Biopsy revealed adenocarcinoma in 3 of 20 cores (one 5%, two 20%). T2C.
Gleason score 3+3=6.
CT of abdomen, bone scan both negative.
DaVinci prostatectomy 11/1/11 at Mayo Clinic (Rochester, MN), nerve sparing, age 62.
My surgeon was Dr. Matthew Tollefson, who I highly recommend.
Final pathology shows tumor confined to prostate.
5 lymph nodes, seminal vesicles, extraprostatic soft tissue all negative.
1.0 x 0.6 x 0.6 cm mass involving right posterior inferior,
right posterior apex & left mid posterior prostate.
Right posterior apex margin involved by tumor over a 0.2 cm length, doctor says this is insignificant.
Prostate 98.3 grams, tumor 2 grams. Prostate size 5.0 x 4.7 x 4.5 cm.
Catheter out in 7 days. No incontinence, occasional minor dripping.
Post-op exams 2/13/12, 9/10/12, PSA <0.1.
Semi-firm erections now happening 14 months post-op & slowly getting a bit stronger.

Welcome 49
(I'm late to the party as in a differtent time zome in Europe)
Todd and others have given you a pep talk already, so what can I add.

I too was 49 when I had my surgery
I too was 49 when my pre-op Gleason 6 became a post-op Gleason 7 with SVI and some extension into the bladder neck.
I too have been scared.
I too have kids (though aged 20 and 18 at dx)

Now I'm nearly 53 and not doing too bad.

When you have a journey you can only start from where you are and not from where you'd like to be, and, although I am a Brit who lives in Holland, I learned my US history and think Franklin D Roosevelt hit a nail on the head when he said: "We have nothing to fear but fear itself".

Feeling bad will not help right now.

So, what next.
Carry on doing things like coming to HW as that is asking for help and what we all need is help. Knowing you're not alone has a positive effect.
Yes I may not be going to die aged 95 like my dad, but I intend to get as many years on the clock as possibole, and with PCa you can do that. (Whereas my neighbour's best friend died so soon after diagnosis I hardly had time to talk to her about it before she was gone).

I also have a message on my screen right now that says "If I have less time then I must do more of the things I enjoy".

We're all different, but perhaps knowing what happened to me will help.
I did not have ED after surgery.
I was dry at night as soon as the cath came out and did not need pads in the day time after about 6 weeks.
After 3 months my first post-op PSA was 0.1
After 7 months my second post op PSA was 0.4 so the uro sent me straight to a RT doc
I had 66Gy of SRT but no HT
My first post-SRT PSA was "Less than 0.1"
I'm nearly 3 years on from SRT and my PSA is now "Less than 0.01"
I still have little in the way of ED. I have started dribbling a bit more due to the SRT, and so I have started wearing pads again to stop the dribbling being an issue by preventing me doing stuff.

I think your family situation is very difficlut, but children understand more than one thinks. When I was diagnosed one of my wife's nephews, aged 12, was the only person to actually come straight out and say "Are you going to die?" So I think you have to include them in case they are troubled and frightened too, but not sharing their thoughts.
I hope you have someone you can turn to for help, be it friend, family, someone at a church etc but someone with whom you can be honest and truthful. In my case, in addition to my wife and kids it was helpful to be able to talk to a close friend too.
You may also want to talk to your children's teachers.

And remember that at HW you can talk about just about anything, we do our best to support, though we are of course not medically qualifed when it comes to certain matters.

Take care
Alf

Bumping this for our new guy 49YrOld - how's it going?

To all my new Friends!
I was off today and didn't get to check the forum. I feel better reading all of your posts and will respond properly when I have accesses to a computer: on iPhone now... So hard to use! Know that your words and encouragement have truly helped me get a grip! Just know that until I found this avenue I was alone. One of the posts mentioned that I may be so frantic because I have 5 children and they don't have a mother. Yes that does consume my thoughts. Many thanks to my brother and sisters in this fight.

49, you certainly got a lot dumped on your plate all of a sudden. You don't have to carry it alone. There are plenty of on-line support groups like this (although not all as good as good as this one), but there are also places where you can sit down with others who have been or are going through this with you. See if your hospital has a support group for prostate cancer. If not, see if your local Cancer Society can help you find one. It sounds like you're a vet; if so, check with the local VA to see if they have one. As common as this disease is in America, it shouldn't be hard to find one through these resources or an on-line search. It will be a good investment in your long-term treatment, and will you handle the cards you've been dealt. It will also helps to prevent unintentional deflection of emotions on others, including those at home. It can also help reduce any PTST that may come later, because this certainly can be a stress-inducing traumatic event. Good luck, buddy, and let us know how your progress is going.