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My dad had his surgery today

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Prostate Cancer
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Posted 4/28/2015 1:11 AM (GMT 0)
It has been awhile since I have visited here. I hope everyone is doing well!
My dad had his surgery today. We got there at 530 am and he was in the OR by 730. Surgery lasted about 3 hours. When I saw him in recovery he said he didn't have any pain he just kept saying I have to go to the bathroom over and over. The nurse said every man says the same thing it's the feeling from the surgery. I left him to go take care of the kids. When I got back to the hospital later in the day he had already taken a walk and was sitting up. Still said he had no pain just tightness in the belly button areas. He does have a drain in. The dr said he got it all and by Friday we should know if anything went into the lymph nodes or not. Is there anything else I should know about the recovery period? How will the next few weeks be. He is most concerned about incontinence. I said let's deal with that and be happy that you are hopefully cancer free now!
Posted 4/28/2015 1:17 AM (GMT 0)
So glad your Doctor is positive they got it all, that sounds good. You have my prayers and make sure to have your dad follow all the doctor's orders...
Posted 4/28/2015 1:19 AM (GMT 0)
Just remind him to take it easy. The first big thing will be catheter removal in a week or so. If he gets up and walks around the house every hour or two that's a good start. Once the catheter is out, kegals are the name of the game....10 reps 2-4 times a day is usually suggested. Walk walk walk and keep hydrated.

It takes time. Once he's continent at night, he's well on his way.
Posted 4/28/2015 1:24 AM (GMT 0)
I tried to explain what a kegal was today but our language barrier(Italian is his first language) wasn't helping lol. The leakage incontinence thing has me confused. Is it like you can leak alittle pee or is it you just uncontrollably pee yourself? I guess for everyone is different im just trying to know what to expect. My mom already is incontinent so having two of them with diapers will be fun. Is there a certain brand of diaper that is good?
Posted 4/28/2015 1:43 AM (GMT 0)
Ok, for men, a Kegal is when he tightens things up and stops the flow. It takes practice. I never used the full diapers. Depends makes several different thicknesses of pads and shields for men, that have a peel off tape and stick into his underwear.

The nurse at the hospital will go through catheter care before he leaves, make sure you sit in on that conversation. Keeping it clean is a big deal. An infection would be a bad deal. What is normal is for him to leak a little when he stands up or moves suddenly. The trick is to learn how to kegal just before you stand up from the chair. It's possible he'll be totally incontinent..but that is relatively rare.
Posted 4/28/2015 2:19 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Teenie,
Good to hear that your dad is doing well. As the others advise, gonna be patience on the recovery. One thing at a time.
Would advice you to create a signature so as to share with us his condition.
All the best to your dad for a speedy recovery
Posted 4/28/2015 2:59 AM (GMT 0)
Glad he's doing well. He'll be fine. Recovery comes in stages with little gains all the time. Rest and walking daily is the best for the first couple of weeks. Don't let him over do.

Keep us updated on his progress,
Andrew
Posted 4/28/2015 3:16 AM (GMT 0)
Teenie - glad the operation is over. It's all up from here

In explaining Kegels to him, with the language barrier, tell him to contract his muscles like he's holding in a fart, but focus on the muscles that hold in pee. there must be a way to say fart in Italian. :-)
Posted 4/28/2015 1:23 PM (GMT 0)
Teenie, one little benefit I had from doing some walking around the house after surgery was that the small amount of discomfort I had after the surgery went away completely for a short time during and after each walk. The problem I had then was to keep reminding myself to stay within the limits of lifting that my doctor gave me. I had to keep reminding myself that no pain or discomfort did not mean I was healed. Hopefully your dad is able to get outside for some fresh air and sunshine as well as a little walking. Sunshine and fresh air always helps in lifting one's spirits.
Posted 4/28/2015 3:45 PM (GMT 0)
Teenie - You wrote "Is it like you can leak a little pee or is it you just uncontrollably pee yourself? "

Right after the catheter is removed there is very little control, yes you just uncontrollably pee yourself.

I wore the Depends briefs (absorbent one-piece underwear) only once, never again. I used the Depends Max absorbent pads I put in my briefs underwear, you can carry a pad in your pocket, and you do not need to undress to change it. They never leaked, I was never embarrassed, no one around me ever knew.

From the first night I was dry laying down but a pad is still needed, you have to get up sometime and when you do, you go. Af first the pads get saturated several times a day. After a few days it happens less because you get better at going in the bathroom more often. As a few weeks goes by the pads are barely damp after a day. At some point you can switch to the medium pad.

It varies a lot but by 3 months many are done with the pads although light pads for when you laugh, cough, or lift something heavy, may be needed for a few more months. Some are finished in a month and a few are never finished with incontinence. The more kegels, the fewer pads....

I hope this helps.

HMS
Posted 4/28/2015 10:34 PM (GMT 0)
Teenie,

Hope for the best, but be prepared for the worst.

Incontinence varies greatly, so does erectile dysfunction (ED). Both problems can be blamed on the patients health and the surgical procedure. Now speaking in generalities. If the patient is health, doesn't have urinary or erectile problems and the nerve bundles are preserved then the outcome is far better. But if the patient is obese, diabetic, elderly then he has a higher probability for incontinence problems. As for ED, the never bundle on each side of the prostate must be saved, if only one side is saved then erection is possible but usually requires longer recovery. Of course each individual is different, and as my urologist told me, "I shouldn't have any problems, but there are no guarantees."

I am in good physical shape, both nerves were spared and was pleasantly surprised to see that I was completely dry when my catheter was removed, and experience no ED problems. I am 99% continent, sometimes when I squat to pick up something very heavy I do pee a couple of drops, but not even enough to show on my pants.

Lastly, most of the men will tell you that incontinence isn't as big of a problem as they originally thought of prior to surgery. You learn to adjust very quickly to this minor problem.

So tell your father that the most important thing is to be rid of cancer, everything else is secondary.
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