So, last night after returning from an awesome Family day on the lake, and after an awesome steak dinner, I asked my daughter to walk over to the local grocery store at the end of our street to get some dish soap Mrs Newt had put on the DEMAND list. My daughter was up for the task, but stipulated that maybe it was a good time to take her Iphone with her, since she recalls seeing something called a Pokemon Stop close by. Well, I agreed, and off we went. We walked over to the local park to work our way back to the grocery store after capturing (or what ever you call it) the ellusive Pokemon Stop thingie.
Just before we got to the park, I had one of those urges we have all come to fear....yes, the DREADED pending fart.
So, very cautiously, I emmited a smidge of gas....then a little more....then a little more, but after that I kinda had that sense of something more substantial laying in wait, so I decided to clamp it until the need subsided. It actually worked!! (That time)
So, we stopped at the grocery store and got some soap, then off for the 4 minute walk home, in which I let her talk me into dropping off the soap, then continuing on the Pokemon Go adventure by walking around the neighborhood to see what wild, untamed Pokemon Creatures could be found lurking in plain sight.
Well, it wasn't even 5 minutes into the safari where Dad got that familiar urge sensation, but after a quick 10 second discussion, and my daughter making claims that she once held it for an hour and a half, my confidence was high enough that I could contain the situation and I agreed to continue our safari on foot.
Well, by the time we were exactly half way around the block...the farthest possible point away from the great white porcelain depository of all things bad...there it was: the unmistakable urge to go, and that dreaded feeling of a substantial mass laying in wait.
At that point, I made my status known, and she suggested we run. Um...that's probably not a good idea I said. But I suggested she run and clear the way for me, so off she went, but only for about 10 strides. At that point, something called a Pidgie showed up on her Iphone, and she expertly swooped it up with her Iphone and declared Victory!
Victory was followed closely by a very strange sounding utterance of oh..ah...ugh!! And then it happened. It was as instantanious as one could ever imagine. Yup, you guessed it. Like a shotgun blast, I filled my drawers in a volley of gunfire, where everyone pulled the trigger at the same time, I Krapt! I can't call it anything else. Dad Krapt!
Well, the need for expedience was gone now, so off I trudged home.
Mom....clean up on aisle 3! 
Dang.... 
Anyways, the moral of the story is "Yes, Pokemon Go is as dangerous as they say" and as a wise man once said..."Never Trust A Fart...Ever Ever Ever Ever"
Happy Sunday all