Article: "Scanxiety, Fear of Recurrence: Whatever You Call It, It's Real"

An interesting article, from "cure" (Cancer Updates, Research & Education). This is about one of the emotional aspects of life after diagnosis...

Scanxiety, Fear of Recurrence: Whatever You Call It, It's Real

From the article:
It has been eleven years since the words "oncology visit" entered my world. Since then, it has evoked a wide array of emotions. Fear, joy, happiness, sadness, hope, love, care, anxiety, just to name a few. There is something that happens when you realize you have cancer. It leaves an indelible mark deep in your soul. It changes you.

and:
If the survivor in your life experiences these emotions, just listen. Please don't tell them that they shouldn't feel the way that they do. Sit with them in their emotions. It creates feelings of confusion to be told you shouldn't feel how you do.

[Edit: Better link. Thanks, CAdogsRus!]

After four bone and CT scans, plus an MRI, I can identify with that. I’m sure there’s folks on here who have had many more.

I don't know about others, but I had problems with the link.

Here's a better link: /www.curetoday.com/community/doris-cardwell/2018/10/scanxiety-fear-of-recurrence-whatever-you-call-it-its-real

CAdogsRus, thanks. The original link was funky, really long for some reason. I replaced it with the one you suggested. Much better!

My wife and I are both now on six month cycles. She sees her hemo-onc on Monday but she already knows her CT was negative from her online portal. As for me, I've had a couple of other cancer scares... one H&N scare a year ago that turned out to be something that could be treated with medication, and the latest one for which I am now scheduled for surgery in two weeks.

A week at Moffitt cancer center was inconclusive. I spent three days there, being subjected to tests where I had to lie on my back on a metal bed for 90 minutes at a time with my arms over my head. Try that sometime, it's not as easy as it sounds. But in the end, it still came down to whatever it is that is growing inside me, it has to come out. If pathology shows that it is indeed cancer, I'll worry about that later.

There are so many variables and even more unknowns at this point that I am at a loss for words. If I were the anxious type I'd be going nuts. And one of the preparations I must go thru before surgery is to taper off my antidepressant, which has been another trip altogether. Learning more new acronyms, like PAWS (post acute withdrawal syndrome). When it rains it pours.

After more than a dozen surgeries in my lifetime (over twenty if biopsies were included) something that one MUST consider is that you may not come back from it. It may be rare, but it happens. Think Joan Rivers. Once again, I find myself envious of those who are fortunate enough to actually HAVE A DIAGNOSIS. For whatever reason, I keep ending up with these things that "could be something or other, but the only way to find out is surgery".

There's no doubt that scanxiety is real. Maybe after the dust settles I'll worry about recurrence. But for now, life keeps throwing new stuff at me. Yesterday I saw a new meme... just when I think life can't get any more screwed up, life says "challenge accepted".

Hey RobLee, no worries.
We all deal with these anxieties, scanxieties, in our own ways. I think sometimes just getting these thoughts out there in words helps us process them. It somehow helps pin down those swirling thoughts we have, and merely the process of expressing them helps us understand and cope.

It sounds like you're in the watch-and-wait mode, and that's a real rollercoaster.

I hope you both do well!