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Posted 11/14/2006 2:27 AM (GMT 0)

This is interesting - at least to me.  Prior to my biopsy, I presumed that I had cancer and hoped that it was found early and contained.  During the biopsy, I asked the doc if he saw anything we didn't want him to see on the sonograph.  He didn't see a thing. 

Now I actually have hope that I don't have cancer and fear that I am riding for a fall.  Am I nuts, or weird, or what?  I hope this gives some of you a laugh, or at least a chuckle. I used to think that I was a rational, mature and clear thinking adult.  I'm beginning to wonder.  : )

Regards,

Bill

Posted 11/14/2006 6:55 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Bill ~ Welcome home……..   No you are not nuts, or weird, or what!!!      You are being hopeful!!!    And that’s a good thing.   Positive thinking is good. A special prayer going out to you with hopes that there are no cancer cells….   Excerpt from “Our Journey” I’m adding, “Worry???”… A member *Wicket J   asked why I hadn’t told her this before they had surgery… J … so… I thought I’d add it to “Our Journey”… because this is truly how we feel and felt.    Worry??????   Why???      Worry causes stress ~!@#$%^&*()_+@#$%^&*    Stress causes all sorts of bad stuff…    It gets you nowhere…    It drains you of strength… and    What’s going to happen is definitely going to happen whether you worry or you don’t worry…    So ~ No More Worrying.   Okay        Don’t worry until you have tooooo!   When do you get your report???   If there is cancer ~ you’ll move on to the next stone and deal with it!!!!!! You’ve come along way …..No backsliding allowed!      Know in your heart you will be okay with what ever comes your way.   You have strength… and you have a whole lot of new friends who plan to walk this journey with you.   And if we don’t have to walk this journey!!!!   You can bet your sweet pea that you will hear some Happy Chirping…… from me!!!!!!    (imagine a bluebird instead of a blue smurf!)     In Friendship ~ Lee & Buddy
Posted 11/14/2006 7:39 PM (GMT 0)
Bill,

When I had my biopsy after the samples were taken they placed me in an exam room and brought my wife in. The urologist came in with the sonograms and said that based upon what he saw he expected that the results would come back negative for cancer as there just was not anything on the sonograms. Based upon that when I went back in a week to get the results my wife did not go as something came up with one of our daughters. The urologist walks in and says that he had not had a chance to review the results and that we would do that together. The he said, "Uh Oh!!" and from there I was so emotionally knocked down that I did not even hear what he said for the next couple of minutes. Then I had to go home and tell my wife and it was like living through it all over again. Needless to say, I did not go back to that urologist and ended up at a university medical center where the professionalism was beyond reproach. I am not sure how you should approach the possibility of PCa but the one thing I know is that because I had educated myself on it prior to being confirmed that I had it I knew what my next steps were going to be if I did have it. I guess it is like the Boy Scout motto, "Be Prepared".

Tamu
Posted 11/15/2006 10:55 PM (GMT 0)

Thanks for the info, Tamu.  I have an appointment tomorrow at 8:30 a.m. to learn the results of my biopsy.  I'm not taking my wife, either, since I have a trip a couple of hours later.  I'm trying hard to be rational about all of this, but I must admit that I'm very apprehensive.  So far, my guy (doc) seems to have a better bed side manner than yours, but we will see. 

One of the guys offered to take my trip tomorrow and Friday just in case the news is bad, but it would mean a three day trip Friday, Saturday, and Sunday and I want that time off.  I told my co-joe that we would have a few adult beverages Thursday night and I have an excuse.  If the news is bad, I'll cry in my beer and if it's good I'll celebrate. : )  Don't worry - I don't fly till 5:00 p.m. the next day.

Regards,

Bill

Posted 11/15/2006 11:06 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Bill!
Our thoughts will be with you tomorrow! Please keep us all posted. From a wife's perspective, it is really helpful if you are both there as if the news isn't what you hope, once a person hears the word cancer it really is difficult to hear the rest of what's said, but if you are both there one remembers what the other missed. That's what we found out, and no matter how prepared you are it kind of bums you out!

Hugs to you and your wife.
;o) Linda and bob
Posted 11/16/2006 1:03 PM (GMT 0)
hey Bill, we're eagerly waiting to hear your results. I laughed at your comment " Am I nuts, or weird, or what? ........ I used to think that I was a rational, mature and clear thinking adult. I'm beginning to wonder." I think this is how we all get when we hear the word "cancer." how can anyone be rational when we have so many emotions going through our heads and hearts? thanks for sharing your feelings. it helps all of us realize that we are normal people dealing with abnormal stuff. I hope your trip went well. kat
Posted 11/16/2006 1:48 PM (GMT 0)
Hi! Re the nuts, weird or what . . .here's my most recent experience . . not even told Bob (the actual patient, victim, etc.) . . . .now that we have all good news post op., the little voice in my head says . . "what if they gave you the wrong results" . . . . so is that nuts weird or what? I'm thinking it's just the result of preparing yourself for the worst and then some small part of your head doesn't wrap yourself around what really happens.
Good Luck again Bill!
Linda
Posted 11/17/2006 5:01 AM (GMT 0)
Bill,

I hope for the best news for you from your biopsy today.  If it isn't what you expect know that we're all here for you and have been through the mind numbing news and can help you thru it.

I hope the news was wonderful!!!

Posted 11/18/2006 4:49 AM (GMT 0)

Greetings to you all:

I just got home from my trip.  My biopsy results are as follows:

Twelve cores.  One Gleason 3+3=6, T1c.  One core pre-cancerous.  The others all normal.  I guess if you're going to have prostate cancer, this is the way to do it.  I'm on vacation the next two weeks and my bride and I have an appointment with the doc on Thursday, the 30th.  I'll be spending much time researching the best treatment for me.  My doc recommended surgery, but at this time I'm thinking radiation, or proton beam. 

I'm very fortunate in that I have high quality people and organizations in my life.  Not just my family, but the people I work with and my employer.  Hard experience has taught me that the better those around you, the better the result of your ordeal.  You are part of that group.

I wasn't surprised at the result.  For some reason, both of us felt that I had cancer.  I secretly hoped for a Gleason 4, but I'll take the 6.  It's time to get busy and make some decisions and get with the program.  I'm tired - will check in tomorrow.

Regards,

Bill

Posted 11/18/2006 5:14 AM (GMT 0)
Bill,

Well I hate to welcome you to the club, but you are a member now whether you want to be or not!!  You have good numbers though and I'm sure will be just fine with whatever procedure you decide on.

Good luck in the future.

Posted 11/18/2006 6:00 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Bill!

Well, your news certainly could have been worse but I know what you would RATHER it had been.

One word of advice when considering radiation . . we were told that if you choose radiation first and it doesn't get all the cancer, surgery (open or laproscopic) is no longer an option. So, we decided on the surgery based on that and Bob is 60 and young enough the doctor said to get rid of the cancer which is what's happened post op.

Also, when we got our pathology report there was a second cancer started elsewhere but still in the prostate that was a much more aggressive cancer - in our case also eradicated but had it been left to do it's thing our eventual outcome would be so different.

Good luck with you decision . . .we all care about you here, so here's a big {{{{{HUG}}}}}}} and please keep us posted.

;o) Linda & Bob
Posted 11/20/2006 3:38 AM (GMT 0)
Dear Bill & Mama Jetguy, I guess it’s official….. U R stuck with me!!!!!     Now if at any point in time you start feeling “down” and the darkness starts to overtake you….. please go back and read each and every posting from day 1…   okay!!! Now you can move on to the next stepping-stone.   I have to second the motion with Lawink ;) Surgery is preferred… in case you need something done ~ down the road then radiation would be a backup.   Not something we like to think about …. but it is something you need to think about .   And by everything we know about you ~ you are in good health and would do well with the surgery. Your choice will be the right choice…. For you!!  How will work impact your decision??   Will they work with you on this?   The appropriate time off??   Just remember…. You have little William looking to learn lots from Grandpa… so William over Work... Our thoughts and prayers are with you as you move forward in your journey.    Thank you for making us a part of it ~ dear friend…. @#$%^& H U G S   *(^%$#@             In Friendship ~ Lee & her Buddy
Posted 11/20/2006 5:18 AM (GMT 0)
Jetguy,

I am sorry to hear about the results of your biopsy. It was very close to mine and I will always remember that moment when I was told. The good thing is that you do have time to research treatments. At first I considered the proton beam approach but when I learned that this would negate any backup surgery it just did not seem the right thing to do. This is especially true for the Da Vinci procedure. Also, the proton beam treatment takes weeks and you would have to go to one of the few facilities around and this may not be near your home. Any type of radiation or proton beam will never be able to give you any good feeling that it has eradicated the cancer. You will always be hanging on those PSA tests for the rest of your life. For me, I just could not take that constant fear. Of course, I still have some fear but knowing my prostate is gone and the post op path report confirmed that the cancer had not gotten out of the prostate just makes me sleep more soundly at night. But the decision has to be one that you make with all of the information that you can get. Good luck on the research and if we can assist at all please let us know.

Tamu
Posted 11/20/2006 8:42 PM (GMT 0)

Greetings All,

I have an appointment with my Aviation Medical Examiner tomorrow afternoon to find out what the FAA thinks about pilots with prostate cancer.  I don't think they'll care about my sex life, but I don't know what they'll think if I end up peeing in a bag.  I need to get this monkey off my back.

I'm on vacation for the next two weeks, so I plan to increase my exercising to two hours a day.  I took a 45 minute walk this morning and will ride a stationary bike for 15 minutes and lift for an hour this afternoon.  Doing this is good for my mental discipline as well as my physical well being. 

I expect to have no problems at work.  I am employed by a fine organization and my co-workers are the best.  You all are an inspiration to me and I am determined to follow in your footsteps - successflully. 

Regards,

Bill

P.S.  How do I do a signature?


Post Edited (jetguy) : 11/20/2006 1:45:32 PM (GMT-7)

Posted 11/20/2006 9:28 PM (GMT 0)
Hey there Bill! We expect you to do just fine as well!

Signatures can be created in CONTROL PANEL; and then in EDIT PROFILE . . . .remember to click on SAVE at the bottom when you're done.

;o)
Posted 11/21/2006 2:28 AM (GMT 0)
Okay ~ I've got to ask..... Where are you and mama jetguy??? On vacation? Where? Now ~ don't forget to be doing your kegels too!!!! Take care and have a wonderful time ~ where ever you are!!! :) Lee & Buddy
Posted 11/21/2006 2:51 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Lee! We're at home and Jan (my bride) is taking care of our new grandson since his mom is back at work. I originally took this vacation to help Jan with the new guy, but now I'm spending time and effort taking care of my unwelcome business. I have not yet decided what course of treatment to pursue and since none of them are ideal, I'm really working on it. It won't be popular on this site, but I'm looking hard at radiation. If that is my decision, I'll be sure to stay here so others who have the same interest can share my experience. This is such a great place that I want to encourage those who choose other than surgery.

I have thought that this wonderful group of people should find a way to meet in person one day. Get a bunch of rooms at a hotel with a hospitality room and have dinner, etc, etc. What do you think?

Regards,

Bill
Posted 11/21/2006 12:56 PM (GMT 0)
Bill, you do whatever feels comfortable to you. My brother-in-law (who is in his early 60s) opted for radiation seed implants. he said that there are surgeons out there who will do surgery after radiation if it's needed, you just have to find them. I think it's a great idea for us to meet one day. I just did that in October with a group of women I've been chatting with for years on a different web site. take care, kat
Posted 11/21/2006 7:05 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Bill & Jan,   Always remember this….   "Your Decision Is Your Decision and it will be the right decision for you!!!!"   That’s what this forum is all about ~ sharing everything…we will always give our opinions and share our stories…. and you pull what you want from them.   It is so important that you stay with us and share your journey….. some of us may be facing radiation at a later date and your journey will help us to know what to expect...  This is “very” important…. Okay!!  I know there's a few journeys with radiation on this forum....  We need this information to share...   I bet Miss Jan is having a wonderful time with William as you are!   Vacation came at a good time because you can focus on your task ahead.   You’ll have a quieter mind ~ if work isn’t in the equation for a period of time.   Okay ~ here’s the deal….. a Special Get-Together is definitely in my book for the future.     This topic came up once before and it really is a great idea….   M.Kat did it and it truly sounds like fun and would mean so much.   Something we all need to think about !!!   I’m in!!!   Take care dear friend and know we are thinking of you during this time….   In Friendship ~ Lee & Buddy  
Posted 11/22/2006 2:47 AM (GMT 0)

Bill,

We seem to have a good bit in common.  Gleasons the same, biopsies on the 9th and 10th of Nov., bad news on the 16th and 17th, and the chance to "talk turkey" with the uros on the 29th and 30th.  Outside of immediate family, this board is the only place I've discussed it.  If you don't mind sharing your decision making process, I'd be interested.  Still researching, but my initial thoughts are leaning toward surgery though I wouldn't rule out anything yet.  Enjoy Thanksgiving, especially that grandson.  Mine is six months old and his sister is two and a half.  They sure are special.  Oh, two more things in common - my lovely wife and I will be married 36 years soon and I've spent my working years on the other end of the mike from you - ATC.

Boo (still haven't loosened up enough to use my name!)

Posted 11/27/2006 5:15 AM (GMT 0)
Hey Bill & Jan,   Just a little note to say hi and I hope you’ve had a good productive week off. Please ~ as time permit….. Share your findings on the treatments your looking at.   We are all learning and the more we know the better for all of us.   Baby William’s first Thanksgiving……      Thank you for your kind note to all of us at Thanksgiving…. It truly is a special day…..   Take care, Lee & Buddy
Posted 11/28/2006 2:46 PM (GMT 0)

Good morning Lee and Buddy,

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday and we had a fine one.  I privately spent the day with my guts in a knot and about half sick to my stomach.  I seem to have gotten over that now.  I'm becoming more comfortable with my decision and the future.  Still, in the wee hours .   .     .

I posted a note to MotelMat yesterday that partially explains how my decision making has taken place.  I would move it here, but I don't know how.  If you would be so kind?

I talked to my Chief Pilot yesterday and the Company is going to pay for an outside source that helps pilots keep/regain their FAA medical certificates.  This is most important to me.  Not only is it how I earn my daily bread, but it's part of who and what I am.  I spend more time uselessly worrying about it than I do about any other aspect of this misery.  If the Feds knew that I was this insane they'd ground me on the spot.

I'v learned that two hours of exercise a day is too much.  I'm managing an hour and a half, so I'll settle for that.  I was doing an hour a day anyway.  It really helps me to feel that I'm doing what I can to get ready for what ever may come.

Keeping My Mach Up,

Bill

Posted 11/29/2006 3:57 PM (GMT 0)
Per Jetguy’s request!!!   Quote from posting to Motelmat on 11-27   Hi Mat, Greetings from the Republic of Texas , Bluebird mentioned to you that I am considering radiation instead of surgery and she is correct.  My wife and I are meeting with my urologist this Thursday and unless he says some magic words, I am going with IGRT (also Google IMRT).  I'm 62 and healthy and exercise and etc. Winston Churchill said that sailors, soldiers, and airmen are the sum of their fears.  I expect that those of use deciding on our cancer treatment are the same.  We make our decisions based on our worst fears rather than our best hope.  That's what I'm doing and I'm doing it intentionally and with good understanding of what and why. My urologist is a surgeon and wants me to have surgery.  He also said that the latest and greatest radiation results are as good (or as bad) as surgery.  No matter what your decision, you can depend on support here.  I expect you already know that. Keep Your Mach Up, Bill
Posted 11/29/2006 4:15 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Bill & Mama Jetguy... Jetguy!!!   I'll be waving at you tomorrow "Wednesday" from the skies over Houston I am so happy to hear from you!!!!!!   Decision making time.... is like when you buy a new vehicle...example:   When you buy a new jeep... you see a lot of jeeps on the road. When you decide on your treatment and start talking about it..... you see that there's just as many journeys..   so you aren’t alone in this decision!   Excerpt from “Our Journey”: One thing each of us must remember…. NO 2 SITUATIONS ARE THE SAME   All different kinds of lifestyles…   different PSA scores, different treatments, different incomes, different jobs, different health issues, all different ages, and most of all… MENTAL ATTITUDES ARE DIFFERENT. So take a deep breath and let this forum help you!!!   We all respect your decision ~ and you know we will be here for you each and every~day and night!!! I'm at the library on their computer because it is soooooo fffaaaassssttttttttt   .... My computer at home is sooooo slow!!!   dial-up ...   and we leave tomorrow on our cruise so I hope to be back on tonight if time permits... if not before I leave New Orleans Saturday !! Take care dear friend and know we care! In Friendship ~ Lee & Buddy
Posted Today 12:16 AM (GMT 0)

Greetings from the Republic of Texas -

I had a 4:00 appointment with my urologist today, but DFW had its annual ice storm, so I cancelled it.  I spoke with his nurse this morning and told her that I didn't need to see him in person and that my wife and I had discussed and agreed on everything, so please have him call me.  We just finished our conversation.

My decision for treatment is Image Guided Radiation Therapy (IGRT).  My intention is to stay on this forum and post my journey through this treatment.  I have no intention of trying to talk anyone into radiation rather than surgery.  I hope to provide information to those poor souls who are still searching for answers. 

There is no way that I will be as eloquent as many others who post here.  I have spent a lifetime controlling and hiding my fears and emotions and it has worked well for me.  I intend to be honest and lucid and plain spoken. 

My chief pilot's boss sent me a nice note regretting my cancer diagnosis and she thought that I have reserves of inner strength and that Jan and I are well equipped for what lies ahead.  I expect that she is correct.  You all are inspiring and will help me Keep My Mach Up!

I Thank You,

Bill

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