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Venting and a Question about "Accidents"

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Posted 8/27/2008 4:59 PM (GMT 0)
 

Seems like my UC and me are doing the potty dance again!  What's that you ask, well... I say to my guts.. "okay time to go to work" and guts yell back "nooooo... no no... you need to go to the b-room instead"... after a few rounds of this I try my best to ignore the whimpering from my bowels, take a deep breath and head out into traffic.  But then the inevitable happens.  My sneaky bowels think "yes, now we'll teach her a lesson!" and low and dehold pick the most inopportune time to shout at me that "I need to go to the bathroom NOW!" shocked

This morning that moment was while I was stuck on a road with no restaurants, or other lovely b-room offering places, in traffic that wasn't moving.  So, by the time I actually got to work, I had a mess to clean up.  Urg. rolleyes

My question is, what are your coping techniques?  Do you have anything you do to chill out and not get paniced my that scream voice from your guts?  How often do you have "accidents"?  (I've had 4 in the past 7 days)

Posted 8/27/2008 5:21 PM (GMT 0)
The book Listen to Your Gut offers techniques for learning to "train" your bowels.

I notice from your signature you're taking Primal Defense. Everyone's reactions are different, but when I took it, after an intial couple of weeks of improvement of symptoms, I began to flare even worse. When I stopped taking it, symptoms improved. It may be worth a trial to stop it for a few days and see if this helps your urgency and other issues.


Posted 8/27/2008 5:22 PM (GMT 0)
Ok, I feel you. I travel with a portable potty in my trunck. I also have tp, wet wipes and plastic bags and a change of clothes. If I am feeling really bad, the plastic bag, tp and wet wipes ride in the front with me under a blanket. I figure, well, if I am going to be stuck in traffic, i spread the blanket over myself and go into the bag. Not pleasant, but who is going to know?? Then I tell myself if I do have an accident, what is the worst that is going to happen? Am I going to get fired for being late?? I will just turn around, go home and wash up. I will make the time up later. No accidents since I started this. Hope this helps and I hope you feel better soon.
Posted 8/27/2008 5:48 PM (GMT 0)
I also have a trunk pack...wipes, clothes, towels, bags...

I have found that seat covers come in handy. They are easy to throw in the washer if needed.

Mentally i sitll haven't figured it out. Accidents hit me hard. I am a wreck for days. In big flares i don't go out. When i need to it's usually not very far.

For long trips immodium.
good luck!
Posted 8/27/2008 5:59 PM (GMT 0)

I use Imodium  - only 1/2 pill helps me and does not cause any problems the next day.  Been using it for years for IBS and now as little as possible for UC.

I, too had problems with Primal Defense and caused me a LOT of gas, etc.  I now take Align and that works great - pharmacy keep it behind the counter.

I just do the usual - take clean clothes, protect your car seat, etc. So far I have never had an accident but came very close.  You know when you start feeling gas and the urge - RELAX - best thing you can do!!

ElaineNY

Posted 8/27/2008 6:00 PM (GMT 0)
Yay, glad to know I'm not the only person who "talks" to their intestine. I can't tell you how many times I've said "STOP IT! I'M BUSY AND I DON'T WANT TO GO TO THE BATHROOM! Why won't you just leave me alone for 5 minutes?!?" . Usually I try to keep the ranting inside my head so as not to look like a crazy person, Hahah

Sometimes doing breathing/meditation exercises helps, but obviously if you're driving you can't really just close your eyes and breathe. But, like the other day I went to MovieStop and they don't have a bathroom in there and the urge hit almost immediately, but my boyfriend wanted to look for movies... So I kneeled on the floor and pretended to be looking at movies on a lower shelf and just tried focus on my breathing instead of the spasming in my intestines. Usually it just gives me enough time to get to a bathroom.

Posted 8/27/2008 6:23 PM (GMT 0)
 

Oh yes, my guts and I have long conversations sometimes! And sometimes out loud (in the confines of my own home) ha ha ha tongue

It's interesting about Primal Defense.  I just started taking it a week ago, but was having issues before that.  Maybe I'll go off it for a while until I get this whole crazy system of mine a little more settled.

I always have spare undies, wet wipes and femine pads with me.  If I am going somewhere and feel like I might have an issue I wear a large night-time pad to 'catch' most of the BM if is should happen.  But its still such an embarassing experience to have to clean yourself up in a public washroom!  LOL - especially when there is a line up! Eeep. 

My body has been so good until recently that I'd stopped bringing my spare clothes etc with me.  It's like I have to learn how to cope with this all over again. (so much for wearing all those cute summer skirts I bought shocked )

Posted 8/27/2008 8:19 PM (GMT 0)
This is crazy and I'm sorry anyone would have to go through this..

Have you ever tried "Levsin" ? It's a small bowel muscle relaxer..
Posted 8/27/2008 9:18 PM (GMT 0)

It seems like you get the urge when you know there is absolutely nowhere to go! Like being stuck in traffic- hey, I've got nothing against going on the side of a road somehwere, behind a tree or something, but how 'bout stuck in traffic on the highway?!?!! It is mental, definitely... I also keep spare pants, wet wipes, ziplock bags, & assorted stuff in my car at all times. I also wear a maxipad 24/7. I've had to go in the backseat, into a bag- thank god for tinted windows!!!! That hasn't happened in a long time though. When you have the necessary supplies to clean yourself up, & you really REALLY believe "Hey, everybody has accidents sometimes, no big deal" then they seem to lessen. Personally, I credit fiber supplements for making accidents obsolete. Have you tried them? Eat a Metamucil wafer a day & say good bye to accidents, hello planned AM bm's! I was just like you- could not get out of the house in the morning. On another note though- skirts are definitely easier to deal with if you have to go *anywhere*. And Immodium works like a charm.

Posted 8/27/2008 11:11 PM (GMT 0)
I agree with Eva. My urgency issue eased off after I started taking 1 Metamucil tablet with breakfast every morning. And I wear a pad when I go out. A better 'protection' gives me the peace of mind and accidents can be avoided.
Having said that, I usually leave home at least 2 hours after I get up in the morning and have some breakfast.
Posted 8/27/2008 11:39 PM (GMT 0)
Like others, I keep a giant zip lock bag in the trunk, and in it are a roll of paper towels and a few large trash bags. I should add wet wipes and spare panties.... Fortunately I have never had to use it, but it gives me peace of mind which I think helps keeps things calm.
I eat a protein-heavy breakfast after exercising but before I shower and dress for work. Two hour routine usually gives me time to go before getting in the car for my 30-40 minute commute. Sometimes I also take half an immodium, it's enough to calm my gut without blocking me up for too long.
Otherwise, when I feel like I might be in trouble in the car, I turn off the music (hubby will keep quiet, too) and turn the air on my face or, in the winter, open the window. Cool, quiet helps.

If you take the metamucil in the morning, it regulates you for bm in the morning? I'm doing better but my system has me going in the middle of the day.
Posted 8/28/2008 1:16 AM (GMT 0)
i feel ya all on the talking to the guts. i also talk to my bumhole too. hehe

i was at the spit (jetty for the americans) over here at the broadwater and its pretty long. i should NOT have walked to the end of it with my husband, but i did anyway. doh! well half way back that URGE came over me bad! i had to stop, grab and squeeze the hell out of his hand. my other hand over my face, butt totally clenched and just muttered over and over 'oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. hold it hold it hold it. oh my god"

then we walked about 20 steps and did that whole process again. and repeated that about 30 times to get to the parking lot/end of the spit. and i can tell you that took ages cuz those 20 steps were like penguin steps. the small shuffling of the feet at to not allow my butt to unclench or open up.

then we get to parking lot and there are some bushes and trees. i was like 'ok thats it. im going in the bushes, get out of my way'

well, it looked like it was not visible to anyone, so i bend down, pull down my pants and squat. totally ready to spray my poos all over the place and fertalize the area. keith yells to me "steph NOOOOO. turn around'

so, i turn around and oh my god... there are 10 hot surfer guys walking my way. in full view of my ass out in the open. the whole other side of the parking lot could see me! i didnt even look over there in my haste to empty my bowels.

so i grunt and grumble, pull up my pants and scream (under my breath of course) to my bowels that they better not blow out.

so i grab keiths hand again (or whats left of it after my death squeezes) and go back to my little penquin steps/shuffles. saying oh my god, oh my god, oh my god... im gonna make it, im gonna make it.. over and over again.

so i finally get to the public toilets, push my way to the front of line and into next available stall and BOOOM!!! i crapped my pants. right there, so close to the can. oh well, i sat down and i nearly blew the toilet threw wall. haha
i didnt have underwear on either. i know i know, what the hell was i thinking? well, never again hey.
so, i had to have keith walk close behind me back to the car and sat on paper towels on the way home.

it is pretty funny now to think about it. but that was a 40 minute ordeal of getting from the end of the spit/jetty to the toilets.

so yeah, i talk to my guts and i have had accidents as well. bugger!
now i strategically never go that far from a toilet anymore.
Posted 8/28/2008 1:50 AM (GMT 0)
i dont understand the, "going in a bag" concept, could someone be a little more graphic please (yuck, i know)  have you tried a coffee can?  you can even sort of balance on it...and it comes with a cover.
Posted 8/28/2008 1:53 AM (GMT 0)
I find that I too, talk to my guts and say, not now... Luckly, I only have a 10 mintue drive to work, but I also find that if I press on the spot where my pain/cramp is, it somehow helps with that. My accidents tend to happen when the cramps won't go away, or when I have to pee really bad too... I carry small plastic cups with napkins in the car, for those moments where I have to pull over on the express way to make a potty. It's gross, but it saves me from having to turn around...
Posted 8/28/2008 3:22 AM (GMT 0)
Dear god, it is good to hear (I mean it's awful to hear, but you know what I mean) that other people have accidents. It's about the most embarrassing thing I have ever experienced. And for me, there is absolutely NOTHING I can do about it. People talk about urgency. I do not ever have urgency. I have immediacy. It's not a "Ya, it's gonna happen soon" it's a "Ya, it's happening now, sorry". Just like you, I have been cruising to work and feeling all fine, and then BAM.. and I actually said outloud once "Really? Are you serious? Are you F'n kidding me? Right now? You can;t wait 3 minutes until I am inside my building?" And then I turned around on the road, called my boss and said I won't be in today, even though I was right outside the gate. He understood.

THe only way that I deal with it, is I do not leave the house until I have darn near emptied my bowels. I get up early, eat, shower, and do jumping jacks if I have to, but I do not leave the house unless I am passing air. I have spoken to my boss about it (and I have to say, I have THE best supervisor in history) and he knows that if I am late, I was in the Bathroom. Wether at home, at Cheveron, at Costco, but somewhere I was in the can. Some days, I just can't get it to stop, so I just have to call in sick or go in at noon. It sucks, but that is my life now. Everyday. And it doesn't always work either, the waiting until I'm empty. Obviously we all know, you are never empty with UC!! It's another one of those gifts that keep on giving!! All day long! And yes, somedays, I wear the funny-yet-necessary man-pon. It has saved me more than once. To include in my own house.

I eat a small breakfast, a light lunch, a semi normal dinner. As soon as I am up, it's go time. And I have no say in that matter. Immodium is a daily routine - 2 in the AM with the rest of my arsenal of pills.

I feel terrible to say I understand, but I am grateful that others understand my plight as well.

I am glad I found this thread, and your vent - I have so wanted to vent about this as well.

I am going to start trying a few of these tips and tricks, to include keeping extra clothes/uniforms wherever I go.
Posted 8/28/2008 5:51 AM (GMT 0)
wow, at least you can 'pass air'.. if i fart its definitely more than air.
its usually a shart.
Posted 8/28/2008 3:01 PM (GMT 0)
That my friend, is where the man-pon comes in.

Even today, I am sitting at home this morning because I "Know" I will have to go, but I haven't yet. I had a ton of gas and mucous/blood first thing, but ya, not empty. SO I called in and let them know. I also worked until 8pm last night so I can have a little extra time.

I'll give it another 20 minutes and then, stick a towel in my trousers, pack an extra set of clothes, and head out.
Posted 8/28/2008 3:34 PM (GMT 0)

A coffee can?!?!?! what a great idea! I only did "the bag" thing once- had to drive an hour & a half into the city to go to a doctors- we get there with no problems, only because I didn't have to leave my house until 12:30pm- I also didn't eat a thing all morning. So we're in the parking lot, & once I got out of my seat to unbuckle my daughter, boom! The urge hits- I'm like the poster who barely gets the urge- I get instant action! nice. So I crouch down in the backseat of my car, hovering over a plastic bag- the only receptacle I had in the car, & do my business. Then cleaned up, tied the bag up & threw it in the hospital trash bin- I know, totally NOT biohazard safe, but what are you gonna do? It can't be worse than dirty diapers & I see those all over the place in public restrooms. Accidents do suck, but once you realize that they are inevitable at times, & when you have a plan in place to deal with them, they really do lessen. A lot of it is mind over matter- that said, when I have to go, there is no way on earth I can hold it for longer than a minute, so I have to be prepared to pullover, dive in the backseat, whatever it takes, you name it. I've had the accident while rushing to the public bathroom! Wearing a maxipad is great- 9 out of 10 times, you just pull off the pad, dump it in the toilet, & your underpants & clothes are totally fine. The metamucil issue- I have been having 2 wafers every morning for a few months now, & they really do work great. I don't know if it takes a day or so to kick in, but daily use of fiber allows me to get up about 2 hours before I have to leave, do my usual 4-6 bathroom trips, have formed stools, then I'm done. It doesn't lessen the urge in that when the urge hits, I gotta go! But I don't get the urge much after my morning trips to the bathroom. It seems to make the stool clump togehter or something, so instead of a million bathroom trips with little production, I have my 4-6 with good bm's, then I'm done. They have truly been a lifesaver for me re. accidents. Prior to fiber, I had no idea when or where I'd get the urge- didn't matter if I sat on the toilet for 3 hours before leaving, guaranteed that when I'd climb in the car, I'd get the urge again, & usually pass mucous & maybe a tiny bit of stool. No thanks.  


Posted 8/28/2008 4:48 PM (GMT 0)
 

Thanks everyone... this is the reason I love this forum so much!  We all go through the same things, and we can find the humour in it! 

I successfully made it to work this morning without any need for immediate stops (although I did take 3 tries to leave the house).  Yippeee!!!  yeah   I actually even made it to the gym for a workout!  I've opted to workout in the gym for now, since I tried an outdoor run last sunday morning and only made it 6 blocks from the house before that immediate "NOW" need hit, and low and behold I wasn't able to make it back to the house.  Running on a treadmill, beside a washroom, just makes all that much more sense for now.  Ha ha ha ... can you believe I'm planning on doing a half marathon in October?!??!?  I'm trying my best now to start stressing about bathroom access now.

I always thought that adding fibre made UC flares worse, but based on what you're all saying, I'm thinking its time to increase my fibre intake. 

The other thing I'm thinking is that I should by a mini-van!  It's a little hard to 'dive into the back seat' in my little sports car - ha ha ha!!  I think it would be pretty obviously what I'm doing back there.  Although I do think I might add a small bucket / can to my 'car kit.'

Posted 8/28/2008 4:54 PM (GMT 0)

Love to read all these posts about "accidents" and urgency.  I am VERY fortunate that has never happened to me - YET!

The question about fiber.  My husband's doctor put him on fiber for chronic constipation (he is 72) and sure helps him.  However, my GI doc said no fiber - in fact, eat low fiber UNTIL in remission and my colon and rectum is healed.  BUT - then fiber very slowly after that.

I believe the probiotics are the main reason my "D" ended and stool got more normal as I am healing.  I only had diarrhea once in a couple week with urgency when I ate seafood out.  That happened very fast and wondering if (because accompanied by pain and indigestion) that the food or spices were the real problem.  I have been home now for four days so have not taken any Imodium and have been doing very well.  My only problem seems to be "side effects" or either/or/and Colazal or Rowasa.  Have a call in to my NP to discuss it.  I hate to give up either - I have lowered doses - dizzy is the worst of it all.  DARN!

ElaineNY

Posted 8/28/2008 5:04 PM (GMT 0)
I've often been housebound because of this stupid disease....

Sold my beautiful car that I only had for a few yrs and bought a mini-van, took the very back bench seats out and put one of those portable camping toilets in the back, easy access for me to get back there since the back passenger seats right behind the drivers seats, are seperated not benched so I just walk back there and do my thing whenever needed.

Beats being stuck at home and it sure beats crapping your pants as I've been there and done that plenty of times over my 17 yr experiance with this DD.

p.s. I use a blanket to cover up the potty so when they're helping load my groceries no one knows what it is.

:)
Posted 8/28/2008 6:16 PM (GMT 0)
Oh - I never leave the house w/o panties! They've saved me a time or two - completely catching accidents and letting me get to the bathroom w/o it running down my legs. I keep a spare pair in the purse at all times.

I wonder how many UCers have NOT had an accident... Maybe I'll start a thread about that.

I agree with the "cool/quiet" approach - that helps. Also helps when you have the flu and are in a car and about to puke or pass out.

I don't take fiber when bleeding, but after I've healed enough and while in remission if I need bulking action, I will start fiber.
Posted 8/28/2008 7:00 PM (GMT 0)
Luckily, I've only had one accident in the car. I had 5 bowls of grape nuts cereal the night before and it caught up with me something terrible. I was on my way to work, so I turned around to go home and shower...change clothes etc. I was only an hour late for work and told them I overslept. They all know I have UC though. Coping with it is hard. I just try to get it all out in the morning.
Posted 8/29/2008 12:33 AM (GMT 0)
I keep reading these stories and saying "Ya, did that.." and "Yep, me too".

This sounds dumb, but for someone who has been living alone with this disease for a year and no one understanding why my social life just stopped all of the sudden.. well this is a huge thing for me to see everyone echoing my exact problems.

I am not alone. It's f'n great.
Posted 8/29/2008 1:54 AM (GMT 0)

TaylorB said...
i dont understand the, "going in a bag" concept, could someone be a little more graphic please (yuck, i know)  have you tried a coffee can?  you can even sort of balance on it...and it comes with a cover.

I think people that use the bag method simply place the bag spread out flat on the ground (or what have you) and squat over the bag and presto...I'm very happy to have my camping potty in the back of my van...my "potty" van...as opposed to my party van LOL!

:)
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