No one can make that decision for you. Only you can. This was my thinking in deciding. If I have surgery there are problems that could happen from that also. I just wasn't ready to have the surgery. I wanted to tell myself that I tried everything before the surgery just in case I had problems with the j pouch surgery or I needed a permenant bag. This is just my thought though. Also, when I went on the remicade my youngest child was only 9 months old. So, I was trying to buy time with the surgery because it is a long stay in the hospital and you can't lift and everything else. She is three now so if I do need it now she will be alittle older and maybe understand that i hurt and can't lift her and no jumping on me, etc. I have been on remicade for two years now and i have my life back. My mom and I were just talking about
that yesterday. I couldn't go any where before and I didn't have a life. While I still worry about
having accidents I have never had one on the remicade before it was almost every day. I also know when I am going to go to the bathroom. Morning is the worse for me. I go when I get up and then after breakfast and then after lunch. I usually don't have to go again until morning. Sometimes I might go after supper. I can hold it also. Not super long but still.
As far as the risk factors. I am scared but besides surgery or having a miserable life I have no choice. I get in one of my moods from time to time worrying about it but I have started worrying less lately. If you can't live with out worrying about it all the time then I don't think you should try it. If you will worry once in awhile and are okay with it then try it. Or do the surgery and then you don't have to worry about the side effects. Alot of people(I think 95% that have it) are very happy they did it. You are so young also.
I hope this helps in your decision making. I know this uc is hard to live with and the choices we have to make all have risks. It is scarey and know you aren't alone.