Most pathetic Doctor ever encountered

Since discharge from hospital Tuesday I have played nurse to a very sick 12 year old girl making meals putting her to bed with all the things she needs, 3:00 am repeat.

I am not supposed to be using my left hand.

I took her to the doctor twice, once tagging along for my visit and today on the weekend because strep culture was negative after 48 hours and she still looked like hell.

I let the doctor ask her questions and my daughter began to minimize the symptoms she was just crying about in the elevator such as burning throat and dizziness.

I said to the weekend doctor 'I hate to foist myself into this examination but want to add that I am heavily immunnosuppressed on high dose prednisone as I was discharged from hospital just days ago and playing nurse to her is exposing me to whatever she has, she previously received antibiotics despite negative strep culture and improved. I think there is benefit to the entire household to do this again as I am her only care giver and already coping with flare, anemia and wrist thrombosis with heavy blood thinning medication. Just my 2 cents not telling her what to do. Later I pointed out I made my comment with 'respect'.

She proceeded to completely flipout on me which shocked my daughter and this woman proceeded to tell me I need to call social services if I cannot handle the care for her.

She then did her 10 point theatrical examination with the express purposed of proving her her pre-conceived outcome that it was viral and no medication would be granted - IOW she was going to show me who was boss.

She also looked at me and said I am sorry your so upset as I sat mute. This my daughter found even more bizarre because I was completely calm and while my daughter knows the difference because when on pred I can become quite volcanic suddenly with rebellious children but not adults.

I looked her straight in the the eye and said 'I am calm it is you who is visibly upset'. I wanted to tell her she should get onto a mood stabilizer before attempting to treat the public or get back onto one she is supposed to be taking.

Lucky I was feeling sleepy from all the anticoag meds or I would have really given her a peace of my mind, no Harvard educated specialist here, just some lightweigh GP who probably got her Dr degree thru mail correspondence in the cayman islands.

After a week of dealing with 10 different cardiac/stroke/hospitalist Doctors in Boulder who were very accomplished caring professionals I was disgusted. I can process competing goals and diagnose far better than her cookbook recipe approach.

She may suffer from god syndrome but all she is, is another fallable mortal who made some observations and formed an 'opinion' there was no scientific test for other bacterial infection but she wanted to act like she possessed my magic powers of observation. Power tripping loony and probably accountable to nobody.

Post Edited (aguywithuc) : 2/24/2013 1:08:43 AM (GMT-7)

That's why they say doctors "practice" medicine...some never get it right!

I HATE it when they try to teach you who is boss.

It has made me come to only one conclusion. Most medical professionals are just tenacious Meglomaniac narcissists. Especially acute care folks.

So sorry you went through it. I hate it when they do it to me. I dont even know what kind of unhinged Id come if someone did it to my kid.

I would report this doctor.

I've seen websites that contain reviews of doctors. If you can locate one, you can report this abuse of power.
I would try googling the doctor's name.

I've actually called the office of one doc and asked if there was a business/office manager with whom I could lodge a complaint.
In the past, I would just walk away but now I think they need to be held responsible for their actions.

Just take a deep breath and avoid "bad language"
The mention of child services was rude and clearly intended to intimidate.
This doc had no idea what your home situation is and the stresses you are under. Where's the compassion?

Problem is that many people view doctors as "Authority Figures" and are afraid of reporting bad behavior.

I agree. I would complain as well. The veiled threat would make me lose my you know what - I don't think I'd have the same self control as you did (on pred no less).

     Just another doctor with the "Don't question me because I am GOD" syndrome.

     My former GI doctor who treated me for 12 LONG years was the same way.  When I was admitted to the hospital in May of 2008 suffering from severe rectal bleeding and a BP of 216/110, he came into my room at 7am and said...."Why did you come to the hospital?"  Well.....DUH!  He belittled me so much that when he finally left, my roommate said to me, "I NEVER in all my life heard a doctor speak with such disrespect to a patient.  If I were you he would NEVER see me in his office again!"  His associate, a very kind man, treated me in the hospital.  After my discharge, however, I tried making an appointment with the associate and the associate phoned me saying that he was caught between a rock and a hard place because my regular GI doctor treated me since 1998 and he didn't want to "steal" any patients away.  Needless to say, I did return to my regular GI doctor, BUT, as soon as he entered the examining room (with a big wide smile I might add), I told him..."Just close the door because I have a big bone to pick with you."  I let into him like a bat out of you know where with my big Jersey mouth.  I was too sick in the hospital and too shocked at how he spoke to me to do anything then.  But I was more than prepared at that office visit.  After that he was sweet as honey to me. 

     I had the last say because I went behind his back to schedule my surgery and never, ever returned to that office.

     Don't take crap from that doctor.  Good for you, you said what was on your mind.  Hope you and your daughter are feeling much better!

WOW what a chorus of harmonizing response. Thanks for the feedback.

"This doc had no idea what your home situation is and the stresses you are under. Where's the compassion?"

Actually I quickly laid it out that I am the sole/primary care giver and had to recently evict her mother, my ex-wife, and then ask her back while I was in the hospital and put on no food or water and prepped for ICU surgery while the ex got roaring drunk spent the $200 we gave her out drinking lost her iphone and attempted to come in through the garage pounding on the door but with child unable to see who she was ( no windows in garage entrance ) and mommy not answering the phone scaring my kid half to death.

Now clearly that means this kid needs me - and with the addition of one more problem I cannot look after her so just order the gall darn antibiotic because its the right thing to do. Worked last time moron.

Telling me at that point if I cannot handle the duties I need to pull in social services was WAY over stepping her role, bad advice ( I have switched to large neighbor family for backup ) but was primarily UNCARING INSENSITIVE and just who the hell do you think you are talking to me that way beotch !

I go completely bananas, volcanic on pred when people act that stupid, I restrained myself for my daughters remaining slim hope of antiobiotics and because my regular GP there is unbelievable, has stepped into personal legal matters on my behalf. I even sent his wife to her fav restaurant with a $200 gift certificate and a note saying her husband was the best doctor in the world. Respect for those people is why that women did not suffer my full on wrath and dealing with a mental breakdown right now.

Maybe I should report her discretely I was not aware the process had any teeth.

The surgeons and Doctors at Boulder Community Hospital were god-like in their ability and humble. Simply the best I returned the day after discharge and dumped off $150 in Godiva chocolates and healthy snacks but left no card no name. It was about thanking them for being caring people. Nice volunteers too one was 81 year old lady very nice.

Post Edited (aguywithuc) : 2/24/2013 4:38:05 PM (GMT-7)

DBwithUC said...
not to break the harmony, but your posts have been a bit intense and slightly incoherent lately.

sure you get harmony when you completely shape the presentation.

be very careful starting any complaint or things could quickly turn to social services taking a look at you.

maybe the doc was horrible, maybe the pred and recent stress is messing with you. take time to reflect before doing anything.

Your post is a bit non-specific. What is 'incoherent' about an example post of mine for instance ? There has been a niagra of information and I have determined root cause, some of my posts are simply going to be a sloppy - the problem is after all in my hand.

Instructions from discharge are to not use the left hand due to ischemia and protect it while also not keyboarding. Obviously I am typing a lot but I am not real concerned about going back and typing a lot of corrections for the reasons stated either.

Intense ? Well if you went to the local urgent care and after they were stumped for 90 minutes told you that you need an ambulance to the hospital because you could 'drop dead' at any minute you dont think that would make your current situation a little more intense than usual, then add leaving a 12 year old home alone or with drunken ex-wife and I have plenty of things to be intense about.

The BIG one was the remedy they proposed, essentially a coat hanger up your femoral artory through your torso and shoulder down your arm and into your hand to fix the blockage. They then add the procedure can be fatal ( but rare ) and is always riskier to distal hand and vastly riskier on prednisone as an artery they are cruising can tear, this would leave them without their stroke heart attack catheter tool and have to open me up medeval to save me. I consider that very intense. Meanwhile in addition to all the research from hospital room, managing my daughter and family's attempts to help I have been working my job dialing into servers as well as attending conference calls online.

How about just finding another doctor?

Obviously on Saturdays you get the lowest ranking doctor (that's why they have that shift). You sound like you are doing a heroic job keeping your daughter safe physically and mentally while trying to get your own physical problems under control. Of course this would make you sound manic when the situation itself is high stress.

Doctors of all sorts are under pressure these days worried about changes in healthcare. Some of them take their own stress out on patients and some are just not good doctors. Most of the GP's I've met do not like to be questioned. They want to give directions and move you out the door and onto the next payment, I mean patient.

There are good doctors out there. Cue the Moody Blues "I know you're out there somewhere, somewhere, somewhere..."

aguywithuc: Now, I could be completely wrong here and if I am, I have no problems with that.

Maybe you would be more comfortable with a "male" doctor? I say this because I think you might be a bit bitter towards women right now (all women), given the situation with your ex-wife.

I am not saying this doctor was justified if in fact, she acted like you say she did.

I take back my original post saying to report the doctor.  I gave it some thought and again, given your situation and all you have been through with your ex-wife, maybe, just maybe, you need to work out some things with regard to all women? 

aguywithuc:  Your response was not snotty at all.  I thank you for your honesty and explanation.   

Good luck with the new woman!   Have you thought about what you are going to do with regard to the doctor that was nasty and rude?