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OT - Getting Married In April... Any Advice??

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Posted 2/17/2014 2:29 AM (GMT 0)
Any good advice? Any good websites or books with things I might like to know??

Thanks :)
Posted 2/17/2014 2:54 AM (GMT 0)
The day of your wedding, make sure you task someone else to work with the vendors (write them a check, answer their questions, make sure they are setup in the right place) as it can be hectic. The last thing you want to do is worry about details: task a friend, a relative or someone else eith it.

Take lots of pictures of you and your wife with family on both sides: don't forget anybody. Don't want to forget the photo with grandma or somebody else in all of the fray.

Try to avoid family drama if you can.
Posted 2/17/2014 2:54 AM (GMT 0)
My husband likes to say there are two words that all good husbands need to learn: YES DEAR! That, and keep your mouth shut and your wallet open. Lol...

In all seriousness, I would say it's very important that you don't keep score. Forgive quickly (and don't bring it up again!) and be prepared to apologize first, even if you feel you didn't cause the argument. That will usually help to calm things down and break down walls.

I really like Mark Gungor. He is hilarious and has a lot of great advice to help you understand each other.

Oh, and congratulations!!!!
Posted 2/17/2014 2:59 AM (GMT 0)
become an elite level master at ducking !
Posted 2/17/2014 3:03 AM (GMT 0)
my parents didn't marry and i've never been married, so i have no advice haha just wanted to say i hope you have an awesome wedding and you're feeling great!
Posted 2/17/2014 3:03 AM (GMT 0)
Ipoop... we're having a VERY small wedding. Our parents, we each have one sibling, and our siblings' spouses. So like ten people is all. Later we're doing a couple events with family and friends like cookouts... but the aim is to keep everything simple!!
Posted 2/17/2014 3:04 AM (GMT 0)

soystud said...
become an elite level master at ducking !

Say what???!
Posted 2/17/2014 3:05 AM (GMT 0)
Oh... you mean to avoid the flying objects!!! I got a helmet for that already. Picked it up cheap at goodwill...

;)
Posted 2/17/2014 3:07 AM (GMT 0)
It's a trap!
Posted 2/17/2014 3:34 AM (GMT 0)

Tornado6 said...
It's a trap!

Lol... this is what I was thinking. I've been teasing my fiancee for a while now telling her I'd back out but I'm in too deep. She has always smiled and said I could get out if I want. But now that we're getting things set up she tells me with a grin that there's no turning back anymore!
Posted 2/17/2014 3:48 AM (GMT 0)
Just agree to everything she says, but make it sound sincere even if it's not, if she has any inkling you're just agreeing for the sake of it, that will likely really piss her off more than if you actually disagree on something and voice it. As a woman that's how I feel lol...I want my way and want you to want my way as well...try all you want, you'll never figure us out, cuz half the time we don't know what the hell we want anyway and when we think we do, we often change our minds, it's a woman's prerogative don'tcha know!!

Women don't like to play games (unless we start it) we just like to keep men on their toes hahahaha!

Good luck!!
Posted 2/17/2014 4:04 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks pb4... for reiterating the fact that women are confusing. It's a complete mystery one moment to the next what you're going to get, lol.

I'm too stubborn to agree to everything she says though!!!
Posted 2/17/2014 4:08 AM (GMT 0)
Hahaha, well you're in for a ride....there's just something about us once the wedding band actually goes on our finger...don't be surprised if you find yourself thinking one day in the future (or even saying out loud) hmmm, you're NOT the girl I married LOL!!

Just funnin' with ya, love can be grand, the key is make sure you keep the love (and respect) strong and true and you will have a fabulous marriage :)
Posted 2/17/2014 4:19 AM (GMT 0)
Don't worry, pb4... I've got a backup plan! I have a perpetually single friend with a fairly big home. I am encouraging him to retain his single status so that I have a hideout to go to when I need to escape!! It comes complete with a never very in order inside of the home and a garage filled with motorcycles, pickups, a car, machines, and a tv with cable. Inside there is a pool table, air hockey, foosball, a big sectional and a couple nice tvs. It has no hint of the flowery stuff slowly entering my home, and talks go about as deep as snowboarding or cars or construction up there. It's perfect... ;)
Posted 2/17/2014 4:23 AM (GMT 0)
Encourage your photographer to take some candid shots but they usually don't like to do this - you'll of course have all the standard shots, wedding party photos, family photos, but my photographer took the most absurd posed pictures, of which we didn't buy - and the candid ones friends took (today you'd have friends taking pics with their phones) turned out to be the very best pictures. I really wish our photographer had walked around and taken on the spot photos, of random tables or a group dancing.

Most of all, cherish each moment of this day, it'll go by so fast. Congrats and good luck.
Posted 2/17/2014 5:07 AM (GMT 0)
Create a vision board for you life together
Write your vows together
Send her a jewelry gift the morning of your wedding, something she can wear like a simple necklace or bracelet.
Do something unique on your wedding day.. since you are having a small wedding you can indulge. Leave in a hot air balloon, rent a classic convertible (bring a mix tape she will remember the rest of her life)... whatever you would BOTH enjoy
Go on an amazing honeymoon
Posted 2/17/2014 6:01 AM (GMT 0)
No advice, really, but I'm getting married in nine months and just wanted to say I REALLY wish I could have had a tiny wedding! My partner insisted on having his whole family there, which meant my whole family had to be there, and I wanted friends there, so wheeee 130 people and all of my money.
Posted 2/17/2014 8:55 AM (GMT 0)
Big congrats on getting married man. Despite your UC, you have lived a very successful life. Many healthy people would still be jealous of you.

Try to focus on how well your life is, not you health.
Posted 2/17/2014 10:18 AM (GMT 0)
Big Congrats.
Make sure your to-be-spouse has a 'good' knowledge of your UC and she is ready to deal with what comes with it.
Don't waste money on wedding, spend it on honeymoon instead.



Pardon me for saying this, but knowing you from this discussion board, get your crap together before you get married. You have been quite down lately, although not much nowadays. With this news, I hope, things are changing for good.
Posted 2/17/2014 12:59 PM (GMT 0)
Congrats. My first thought was like Tornado's. It's a trap. Haha just kidding.
Posted 2/17/2014 1:11 PM (GMT 0)
If I had to do it all over again, I'd hire a better photographer and not worry about the money. My wedding pictures are OK, but nothing like others I've seen.
Posted 2/17/2014 2:03 PM (GMT 0)
T, you are we quite lucky you get to keep things small.

I second fruigirl's notion on opt for a really good photographer. While it is true that anybody (an uncle or a buddie) can snap a few photos, there is quite a bit of difference in quality, skill, and ability between photographers. I spent a few hundred more for a photographer who had a much better portfolio then the rest. The guy's albums were really awesome, had good artistic sense, all of the shots were well composed, poses were great, etc. You don't have to pay a ton, a good photographer is pretty ease to spot from his/her work.
Posted 2/17/2014 2:24 PM (GMT 0)
My only advice is to throw any books on the subject in the garbage. Just like raising kids, you can't do it from a book. Everybody does it by the seat of their pants and the ones with books are delusional regarding real life. I remember an episode of Star Trek The Next Generation where Worf is trying to deliver a baby by the book and realizes that this birth is not going by the book. So be a marriage. Just remember that there are bound to be rough times and no marriage is a 50/50 relationship.
Posted 2/17/2014 3:05 PM (GMT 0)
I got married at a courthouse by a judge. Best thing I ever did. No drama, no bs, no stress. Plus I saved my parents tons of money and then when we were struggling financially in the early years they were more able to help.
Posted 2/17/2014 3:42 PM (GMT 0)
about the photographer, maybe they don't take such cheesy posed photos anymore but the ones I referred to in my first reply on this thread, were beyond silly. He insisted we wave goodbye to our city before leaving in the limo for the honeymoon. Later the studio super imposed a back drop and they raved about it during our appt to preview the proofs. My husband was really ready to erupt and I tried to keep the peace because at that point were married, wedding long over. But I did regret hiring this company. Their studio had a fire about 5 years ago and we both said - there goes the proofs we didn't want anyway (they tried to sell a package price for all of them).

To this day when I want to look at our wedding photos I view the ones leading up to the ceremony, during and after at the church. Our photographer seemed to turn into someone else at the reception, all of his ideas were awful for posed pictures there!
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