Telling people about uc

I fell ill nearing the end of my senior year and I was gone for about a month until I had a c-scope and was diagnosed. People were questioning me right and left and I told my close friends and my boyfriend about it as well as my teachers. But when I told my friends and boyfriend, I was specific in saying I don't want to be treated any differently than they treated me before I was diagnosed. When I told my teachers, I warned them that I might have to make sudden and urgent trips to the restroom at any given point during their class. They were very understanding and they accommodated to my missed work in school and even lightened my work load.

So, I would say that when approaching the situation that someone is asking you or you're in a position where it's important for your medical condition to be known, you can say anything from "I have some stomach issues" or "I have a medical condition". Best of luck to you :)

It has been incredibly healing for me to tell people about it and explain what it is I'm dealing with. When I'm flaring I withdraw from life and activities, which can make people think I'm mad at them or don't value their friendship. Now, I can just explain I'm flaring and people understand.

I actually "came out" a few years ago when I wrote about having UC for Salon.com. I was really surprised how many people responded positively. Of course, there were plenty of "ew, you're disgusting" comments, but that's kind of par for the course on Salon.

You have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of, you know. This isn't your fault. I know it's hard to believe that sometimes, but it's true. Hang in there!

I hope this doesn't confuse the issue but I’ve finally learned that the answer is just to do what is in your best interest at the moment and forget about it.

I was diagnosed with UC in my late forties so my pressures are vastly different, incomparably different than those of a younger person. But having said that, this is my story. I worked at the same firm for 30+ years and when things UC got bad, I only told people some generic mush about gut problems. No one knew what UC was, sometimes I'd mention I had something like Crohn's but that always drew blank stares. Basically no one knew what I had and I would just silently get up from meetings, or, more often, simply miss meetings or phone calls or whole days (with notice if I could but that was sometimes impossible to arrange). I had convinced myself that people would think it was a trivial case of my simply having to go to the bathroom more often than they did. Eventually I think the perception grew that I was just unreliable, all because I didn't make sure that the people who needed to know actually knew. I lost that job in March in small part because of that very incorrect perception (mostly though it was a random widespread layoff).

As a hopeless introvert, I really don't care about gossip or what people say. I never have. That is also a luxury afforded by age. But I do care about two things: my integrity, and how I affect the people I love. Fortunately, job loss aside, my integrity is intact; those who made the firing decision had never even met me. But the latter is more important so, as a result of reading some posts on this board, I recently sat down with my extended family and told them the details and effects of the condition and assured them that my refusal of their invitations, my lack of availability and my crummy moods were not a reflection of our relationships, just another symptom that I have to manage. I asked for their help and understanding and that they please not offer advice because that makes me feel helpless. I found by laying it all out in the clear, we are all relieved of the fear of how each other will react, misperceptions are kept at a minimum, and there is thoughtfulness on everyone's part about how we deal with this. What other people think is now one less thing I have to worry about.

So should I have really educated my boss about the condition? Probably, though I'm glad I'm retired now. The more important thing was to make sure those people who are truly important to me have a real understanding that this is not just a fancy stomach ache.

Hi, I definitely think your teachers should be aware, but honestly I would not even think about telling school friends, from my experience its best left alone, once its out there its out there, and its a terrible feeling when people know such personal stuff, especially if you have a fall out...not saying that might happen, but I wouldn't want to risk it...kids at school can be brutal.