colitis, crohns? some support appreciated

Hey all,

first post on the board although I read threads a while back pretty regularly while I had nothing to do in the hospital. I'll give a bit of background first. I was diagnosed with colitis in the end of 2012/beginning of 2013. Since then I had to stop all the sports I've played throughout high school and into college.

I have had one unending flare that has never fully gone away. Things continually got worse until 2014 where I reached bottom (so far). By 2014 I had went through lialda which did not work and moved onto steroids which worked for a little but began to fail in the fall semester. At this point I tried the SCD diet stubbornly continuing it as things got worse. I then went onto remicade which worked partially but I had a reaction to it a couple of months down the road. That is when my health took a nose dive, by the end of the semester I had a hemoglobin level of 7 and was down to 3 percent iron (but I finished the semester with great grades! Dedicated to not allowing this to take every part of my life away). The year culminated with me spending New Years in a hospital bed :(. I was put in the hospital again multiple times at the beginning of 2015... does it feel like a second home to anyone else? Things however did finally get better at the end of the spring semester. I went on my longest vacation from the hospital yet, 4 months, but that's looking like it will end soon.

I went on 40 mg of steroids again while I interned at a national lab over the summer, which was awesome. I began humira and slowly weened off the prednisone until I was completely off by sept and only on humira. At this point I feel like I've tried every holistic healing method possible. I meditate every day, make sure not to eat foods with added sugar or unnatural ingredients, and avoid bread and milk for the most part. Unfortunately yesterday I saw blood again with diarrhea and again twice today with the last one looking black, and an awful lot like digested blood. I'm starting to freak out that I have crohns and would really just like some advice or words of wisdom from people who have been here. My crazy emotional state of mind right now is proving pretty difficult to calm. I appreciate all the replies

thanks for the insight. You're right in that I need to clear my mind of prejudiced thoughts. I didn't think I have crohn's because it is a stubborn case but rather because of the black stool which could signify digested blood from the upper digestive tract. But I think, like you said, I just need to clear my mind for now.

My advice is don't analyse every detail of stool. Our digestive track is messed up so normal rules don't apply to us.

Also it really does not matter if its crohns or colitis until you need surgery. Treatments are same. When you need surgery, they may not do J pouch if it is crohns. But again if your crohns is limited to colon, some places might do j-pouch for you.

I know it is very hard not to think about the worst possibilities when you are in flare. Did you try to use enema? It should help if blood is coming from left side of colon.

Hope you feel better soon .