"She has told me that once you come off a biologic, you can never take it again because it won't work - is that true? " There's increased risk of forming antibodies to remicade, once stopping it. Not guaranteed to happen by any means, but can happen to some. For that reason, the general clinical recommendation is to not stop a biologic for as long as it works for you.
"I'll still have the same immune system, so why wouldn't it just switch from attacking my colon to attacking my joints even more aggressively? Or start attacking my small intestine? " Some of us have extra-intestinal manifestations (joint inflammation, eye inflammation, among other things). They can get better as our UC improves and worse when our UC flares in some cases. Having a colectomy doesn't eliminate our extra-intestinal manifestations. You'd still have joint issues after a surgery. I don't think it is common for our immune system to attack something else just because we had a colectomy.
Due you have RA as a second auto-immune condition? Or is it one of the following in the PDF:
www.crohnscolitisfoundation.org/assets/pdfs/arthritiscomplications.pdf