Spinning out of control - Just venting

Am I going insane?  I really think I am.  Since December when I went back on Prednisone, I have been on an emotional rollercoaster that just doesn't seem to end!  I am happy one minute, crying the next, and then soon after, I want to rip someone to shreds.  Totally out of character for me.  I keep reminding myself that I am one of the lucky ones, having great healthcare, extended benefits, a great GP, (a so-so GI), a great family, amazing friends, and I am not as sick as some with UC.  But it isn't helping me!!!!  I find myself on edge, tired, and now I am even forgetting when I work!  Not good.

I am in chronic pain, a lot of it right sided now which is new for me.  Excruciating headaches.  Sore muscles.  I am so freaking tired but I can't seem to sleep.  I am trying to live normally, even getting out on my snowmobile, up on a mountain top in the sunshine (which ROCKED) but I still found myself having to really keep a tight rein on myself emotionally. 

I saw my GP today and she is so good to me.  She is trying to do anything she can to help me and she lets me fall apart in her office.  And she gets my sense of humor, which is good.  (My best friend and I both tend to use humor to hide emotions).  I felt better after leaving her office but I know that the rollercoaster is just on the uphill climb right now and soon I will be spiralling down completely out of control.  Is is just me?  Am I insane?  Does anyone else feel like this? 

I am scheduled for another scope on Feb 5 and I can't wait to find out what is going on in there.  Has it spread?  Is it under control?  Can I get off prednisone????? 

Thanks for being here.  I feel better now.

My heart hurts for you. No, it is not just you and you are not going crazy. I have not been on the prednisone but I think when someone goes through this it is truly difficult and hard to deal with.

I too have broken down in my Dr's office, not just a sniffling cry but what I call an ugly cry. snorting, snotting, you get the picture :)...You are going to be okay but I think it is so important to continue to reach out to those that are going through or have gone through what you have.

We are all here for you...be good to you! xo

You sound like I did the last time I was on pred. I thought I was going off the deep end (I'm usually a happy go lucky type). I was absolutely not myself. I started taking Effexor XR and it helped tremendously. I hope you find relief soon, hang in there.

Hi BC Girl..
Yeah as other posts have mentioned it is the predinsoline.. I too started this med (Again) in December due to a flare up.. I was in remission for almost a year previously.. and just like you im like a crazy man one minute and fine the next.
To put your mind at ease, it was the predinsoline which got me under control previously, so hopefully it will have an impact on you soon.. and you will ease of it slightly.. dropping down per mg each week/day.. Until you are flare/pred free!..well thats what my gp has me currently doing. Not sure how you guys go about it in America, (Everyone seems to live in America on this forum..lol - I'm from Ireland..

Again, Im sure things will improve soon..

Take care,

M

Christine1946 ~ I am sorry that things aren't going well for you either.  I have come to the conclusion that prednisone is evil! Yesterday at my GP, I told her that there was no blood in my BMs anymore, just mucous, but that I was still going frequently.  She told me to again start reducing the prednisone, now by 1mg a week.  Two hours later, BLAM!  Blood in BM and again in the evening.  Along with lots of gas, bloating and pain.  I wonder if it's because of my "meltdown" in her office?  Of course, my GP is gone for a week now.  So, on my own, I have decided to not reduce the prednisone right now.  I have been on 10mg once daily for awhile now, I figure I will just stay there until I see my GI on Feb 5, unless I go a week without blood, then I will reduce by 1mg.......

I wonder why there are so many differences of opinions when it comes to prescribing prednisone?  I usually start at 40mg for a week and then each week, based on my symptoms, taper down by 5mg until I am on 5mg every other day.  Last time, I was on prednisone for 7 months!  But side effects last time were completely different than this time..........

I know how you feel about seeing your doctor so freqeuently.  I have been seeing mine once a week since November!  Now I can go about two weeks before she wants to see me.........I do appreciate her though! 

Good luck!

Again, thanks everyone for reminding me that I am not alone.