I want to feel normal again!

I've been dealing with proctitis, UC and gluten intolerance for last several years. I've had a very bad flare up in past few months, including fecal incontinense for first time.   I'm getting hesitant to socialize and my sex life is virutally dead. My husband is very understanding but I feel so self conscious! I really feel alone in this because no one else in my life has these issues!! I had an flex sig yesterday and they confirmed severe proctitis but my MD won't adjust my meds until the biopsy comes back. Rihgt now I use canasa, rowasa and cortisone enemas because I can't tolerate asacol orally.

While I don't suffer from the UC dx, I have severe IBS as a result of having had colon cancer, a vital part of my colon removed. I can relate to how you're feeling because it's difficult to pull off sex as well, that's the last thing I want to do when I'm experiencing D or close to it (extremely messy bm's). My husband is very understanding though so that's a comfort. I have virtually no one in my life who struggles as I do. Which makes managing bowel issues to this extreme a challenge. Everyone around me has normal colons, normal bowel habits, they are able to socialize without ever having an issue. It's not like I want others to struggle as I do (the only person I can think who I'd wish this much trouble to is Bin Laden!) but when someone says - I understand or I hope you feel better - it helps. But I don't often hear these words. And yet, before I had all this trouble - 11 years ago - I'd like to think I would have been understanding to someone with UC, IBS, but I doubt that I would have completely understood. Which is why I find it frustrating talking to colon and GI doctors. Even they don't often "get it'.

I do think these forums are great. We can lend each other support and understanding to get through the challenging days.

Wishing you better days and all of us better days.

Sometimes ~I~ want to take my darn colon/GI tract out and say - let a machine do this for me. I'm done. Then the next day I wake up and try again.

Years from now hopefully they'll have this all figured out. I am hoping my daughters - 20 and 23, in the colon cancer risk, my dad died from CC - never struggle like I do.

The fecal incontinence was the worst for me and made me wake back up that the UC was not truly in remission. Am back on meds again and not sure how to explain to family why I can't be away from restrooms for more than 1/2 hour, less if eating... HATE UC. HATE IT. Tempting to remove colon as my sister did as she appears to have a good life now, but hers was removed at 19, so many years younger than me.

I hope things improve for you soon. I feel your pain.

I understand the not feeling normal part. Although not married, the lack of sex drive really did take a toll on my current relationship. My fear of my symptoms and the actual symptoms themselves made sex uncomfortable. I also felt so unattractive. It makes me feel better that others have had similar experiences.