J-Pouch Diet

I'm 26. Started bleeding at 18 as well same type of story as you. Haven't hit 29 yet so I don't know if I'll take the same turn but another 2 week hospital stay is always hanging over my head. My first flare up the doctors almost pulled out my colon on the spot but I got to keep it for the time being as long as remicade keeps it in remission.

From what I've read the surgery increases the likelihood of suicide by 8x. I'd say to definitely talk to your doctor about your suicidal thoughts because in my view, I've had them and talked to my general practitioner, it's just another side effect of the disease.

As far as not being able to eat anything healthy I put on 90 pounds and went from 165 to 255 because I couldn't do whole grains, nuts, veg, fruit or any of it. Which has rwally hit me hard because im 26 and im normally very athletic but i cant explain to everyone i meet that im fat because of a medical condition. It's depressing as all hell. I'm still off all that stuff. It's just all the worst stuff now. My diet is about 90% starch. It's awful. I'm down to 225 now and I'm not sure if I'm still losing or plateauing but I just started calorie counting in january and cut out 25% of my calories. I think there's 3500 calories in a pound of fat so if you can reduce that much a week you'll lose 52lbs in a year. I figure that's 500 less a day which I can do alright.

Working out I've just been doing a lot with my arms focusing on biceps and triceps. It's weird going from being a gym rat to feeling like I'm all washed up at 26 years old because of this illness. But I'm taking my life back.

The pain is the one thing I can't deal with and I commiserate 100%. I didn't sleep for 3 days on my last flare up until I got to a hospital and they had me on dilaudid Q3 for a week. Once a new nurse saw I was sleeping and didn't give me my dose and I had a nightmare I was being stabbed and I woke up with my jaw locked shut from my pain and I was shaking it hurt so bad. I'm with you on the pain. I don't know how I'm going to mentally cope with the reality that this pain is just out there somewhere waiting for me to have another flare up. It takes away all my coping mechanisms. I can't sleep, I can't eat, I can't get caffeine, I can't just go to work, I can't even think when it's going on.

Yeah, I'd say talk to your doctor about the suicidal thoughts because they're not uncommon they're a product of the disease and need to be treated with the rest of it. Calorie count since healthy food is not an option. 500 less a day will shave 50lbs in a year. And focus on arms for definition. We can't get strong because the core is too painful to work but at least we can nurse some glamour muscles a little.

Hope it helped. Now 29's going to be my new scary number. It sucks to be so young on this forum haha

Just a note to hang in there. I'm newly diagnosed so can't offer the support and wisdom that others can but spent a long time in tears today because we had to cancel the honeymoon we've spent three years waiting to take - I'm waiting to start my remicade loading doses, still flaring, and we can't be ready to leave in ten days. I understand feeling guilty and inadequate. BUT...Whatever you have going on with your weight, your illness - speaking as a wife, your wife is so much happier with you than without, and your son too. Get to the doc asap and talk about your depression. Get another surgeon and GI to look at you and hopefully find new solutions. You are so much better as a part of your family's life than without. Take it from someone who lost her dad 13 years ago, pretty young, and has missed him for every single decision and big moment, small moment, and holiday there has been. He was terribly sick for years but I'd give anything for another day to talk to him. Stay with your family and get another look from your docs.