I like your style Bill!
If you are a metal smith & a mechanic - where are all the new inventions for one way valves for the LES sphincter? Or how about a magnet or two placed in the stomach, and some more on a belt to keep the stomach and the hernia's down.
Really I think I have missed my calling, instead of being an author I should have been an inventor - it's far more fun trying to find solutions for hideous problems