my momma

My mother was diagnosed with AD sometime in 1996. She had a heart problem so she had to take Lanoxin every day. One morning a friend of hers called and mom wouldn't answer the phone, then her friend called me and I called the manager at the apt. she was living in. They called me back and said they could hear her talking but she wouldn't come to the door so I told them to kick it in and they found her lying in the hallway almost naked. She was taken to the ER via ambulance and her heart rate was only 30 and we were afraid we might lose her. Turned out that she had been taking more Lanoxin than she was supposed to and that's when her doctor diagnosed her with AD and told us she couldn't live by herself any longer. We hired my oldest daughter to move in with and take care of her but she's an alcoholic and we had all kinds of problems so we decided to move her closer to where we live. Bought a big mobile home, both my daughter and mom moved it. At that time my husband were on site managers for a 420 unit storage facility. I always called around 8 to make sure mom was okay and some mornings mom answered the phone so I would always ask her where Lisa was and she told me she hadn't seen her. She had been sneaking out at night and left my mom all by herself. It got so bad that we had to resign from our job. My husband was working as an electrician in Indy so he didn't have to resign from there.

We finally got all moved in and my daughter lived with us for awhile, then she started going out at night and would come home with blood all over her wrists. She usually always done that when she was drunk or whenever she got mad at a man. It took a long time before we could get her to move out because she refused to leave. I called her oldest daughter and she drove down her and told Lisa she was going to have to move in with her. She yelled, kicked, screamed "This is my house and I'm staying here" but her daughter finally convinced her to move out.

When we first moved in with my mom she could walk, talk, eat by herself, dress herself and bathe herself.

In January of 2000 she told me she was having pain in her chest so I thought she might be having a hear attack so I called 911 and the Paramedic's were here in just a few minutes. Mom was sitting in a recliner and as one of the Paramedic's was helping to pull her up out of the chair he dropped a big oxygen container on her foot. Took her to the ER and doctor ran tests on her but this time it wasn't her heart. All of the bones in her big toe were shattered so she was admitted to a nursing home that was in the hospital for PT. She then got gangrene in her foot so the orthopedic surgeon removed her big toe. While she was in the nursing home she fell out of bed, had a small cut on her knee but they didn't bother to have an x-ray done. Believe me I chewed the nurse out bigtime. She then got cellulitis on her knee and it wouldn't heal so she ended up having to have her leg amputated above the knee. She was admitted to another nursing home for PT and I hated that place because they didn't give her her meds on time and instead of changing the bandage on her knee everyday the nurses would just change the date on it. Once again I chewed them out, had to do that almost every day she was in there. She had several TIA's so her left arm was paralyzed. On May 31 of 2000 we brought her home and it was so hard to care of her because she couldn't do anything by herself and I became completely exhausted and lost a lot of weight. Eventually she was put on Hospice but the nurses came to our home almost every day. I didn't want her to pass away in a nursing home. Sometime during the week of Nov. 1 2000 she got a kidney infection so the Hospice nurse ordered an antibiotic but it wasn't caught early enough. All that week she kept getting worse and her temperature kept getting higher. I slept on the floor next to her hospital bed so I could check her temp every hour or so and on Nov. 6 I checked it and it was 107 degrees so I called one of the Hospice nurses and she told me that mom was dying. I totally freaked out. The nurse came early that morning and stayed all day, my brother was here and their were other people here to but I can't remember who they were anymore. My brother and I sat by her beside all day watch her slowly pass away and around 6:30 that evening we watched her take her last breath. Of course I became hysterical and by the time I came out of her room our pastor, some of the neighbors and my youngest daughter and her husband and several other relatives were here. The nurse called the funeral home and she wouldn't let me watch them wheel her out to the van they were driving.

In March of 2001 I filed a lawsuit against the city we live in and the Paramedic's. We finally settled for x amount of dollars.

I'm sorry for such a long post and for hijacking this thread. I just got to carried away and I apologize for doing so.

well, momma fell the other day. but she's ok. went to see her yesterday. she was her happy little self. she was watching tv. so she didn't talk much. i miss our talks. thanks for listening.

well yaw, the 12th is mommas Birthday. i have no idea what to get her. she has plenty of cloths. 2 baby dolls, stuffed animal that talks. what can i get her? any ideas? thanks.

I am so glad you spent her BD with her
KNOW you are a very loving GD
A teddy like that dog is a really nice present
Keep me posted please

LYN

Hello tiny,

I am so sorry that happened to your Momma.  I think I would talk with the person in charge of the staff and voice my concerns very clearly.  Each new person in orientation should be taught how each patient needs to be cared for.

I agree you had every right to be upset. You are one super advocate for your Momma.

Bless you and take care.

Kitt

well my son drove me to see momma yesterday. she was having a bad day. no smiling. very confusied. she didn't know me the whole time i was there. she kept saying who are you. she's never done that before. i just loved on her. and told her who i was and kissed her. she hasn't been eating much either. i came home and cried all day. i can't hardly stand watching her decline so fast. i hate this disease.

well, there was something wrong with momma. they put her in the hospital. her kidneys were shutting down. and she's bleeding. she's been in there 4 days now. i don't think she's going to get better. i don't know. not eating. and there's a hurricane coming tommorow or next day. i'll have to evacuate. i'm so scared of everything that's going on. maybe i'll have a home to come back to. i'm in texas. say a prayer. thanks.

hi rosie, thanks for writing. momma still won't eat. she had fever last night. i don't know but i think she's dieing. i'm so upset. then i don't know if we're going to evacuate or not. we're waiting. i'm scared. yes momma doesn't know what's going on. thanks for listening.

Tiny,

I know what you mean about nerves being shot. This stupid disease affects everyone. I'll be praying for ya'll.

9ball

thank yaw for your prayers. they let momma out of the hospital yesterday. she's bed ridden now. she's very pale and weak. their calling in hopsice today. i'm very scared. i know this means she's dieing. i can't seem to quit crying. thanks for listening.

Tiny,

I will be praying for you and your mama.

Dorseys daughter

(((((( tiny ))))))))) Its good that your mom is upright for a couple hours a day. Laying down all day is really bad for her circulation if she is able to sit upright for a while. I'm sorry you have so much going on in your life right now. I imagine you'd like to have your time totally unhindered to spend it with your momma. I hope she is comfortable where she is at and that you will develop a sense of peace about her care. I know how difficult it is to watch someone else take over the care of our parents. * sigh * Its just too hard. Hugs and . . . Blessings!

(((((( Tiny )))))) I gave in to it all when my dad was in his last months and decided to enjoy him each day "just the way he was". It really helped me to get the most out of each visit with him. I hope you notice some renewed energy/peace. I'm sorry you are in this most difficult time. Blessings!