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GET MY MOM OUT OF A NURSING HOME

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Alzheimer's Disease
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Posted 1/23/2014 7:04 PM (GMT 0)
I'm new here and need help. My mother has been having memory trouble for about a year. She lives in another city than me. Her brothers and sister have convinced her to give them POA. they have been very mean to her and she got in her car and drove to a local church and sat there crying. A lady saw her and called the police which after asking her a series of questions determined she needed a psych evaluation. they took her to a behavioral place and later transferred her to a secure unit in a nursing home. Meanwhile her brothers and sisters transferred her car and home into their names and closed out her bank account. My mother is devistated. I am trying to get guardianship of her now. The nursing home tells me that they won't let her leave even if I have the guardianship because it's against doctors orders. This is crap she is not that bad. She only has trouble when she is upset. It is very easy to confuse her. My sister and I live 1 mile apart and we want her to come live at my sisters who is home full time. How can I get her out of there when she has a doctor that won't budge? I live in TX
Posted 1/23/2014 7:55 PM (GMT 0)
Personally, I would contact a lawyer if the brothers and sisters won't allow you to take her out of the nursing home. A lawyer might be able to get the POA transferred to you and will be able to tell you how to go about doing it.
Posted 1/23/2014 7:56 PM (GMT 0)
Btw, the nursing home is telling you false information. If you get POA, you have every right to pull your mother out of there despite what the doc says.
Posted 1/23/2014 7:57 PM (GMT 0)
i already have a lawyer that's working with me on getting the guardianship. it's the nursing home that isn't budging. her brothers and sister will get theirs through the legal system.
Posted 1/23/2014 7:58 PM (GMT 0)
Red_34, do you know where i can find that written? I'd like to walk in there with something so I can show I'm not misinformed. My lawyer just keeps telling me one thing at a time and it drives me nuts.
Posted 1/23/2014 9:23 PM (GMT 0)
It is not a written law per se but you might want to ask the nursing home for their rules and regulations manaul; but not only do you need the POA but Durable Power of Attorney as well. The DPA allows to you be in charge of the medical aspect in addition to all things related (financial etc - POA) to your mother. Consider the POA and DPA as an extension of yourself. With the POA and DPA, by LAW the nursing home will have to abide by your wishes as long as it is in the best interest of your mother. If they do not abide by your wishes, they can be sued and brought to court once the POA and DPA is in effect.

It takes time to makes these things happen so please have patience.
Posted 1/23/2014 10:50 PM (GMT 0)
Holding a person against their (or their guardian's) wishes is considered kidnapping or unlawful imprisonment, depending on the state. You will have no problem taking her out of the nursing home once you have guardianship. If the home is still balking at that point, just call the police to assist you
Posted 1/24/2014 12:32 AM (GMT 0)
Please do all of the legal manuevers first - and get her out of the nursing home (if that's really what it is). An attorney may be needed to change the ownership of property back into your mothers control - preferably thru a revocable living trust. In the future, unscrupulous relatives will find it hard to take off with some of her money.

Then, at some point, have her evaluated by a doctor. You very well may need a second doctors opinion to get a release - check with an attorney. If it is the early stages of dementia, it could very well work out fine at your sisters house for a few years.

But, eventually .... it likely would require a 24/7 trained caregiver ...... and then ultimately a Home for dementia (if that's what it is) .... not a nursing home. My Mother spent the last 16-months of her life - until last week - in an Assisted Living Home for Dementia & Parkinsons. It was very specialized. They were exceptionally good - but in time, it can get expensive.

Personally, if there was any way to pressure the people who did this to your Mother - and check with an attorney - but I would consider filing legal charges - or threaten to. It's disgraceful to do that to your Mom.

Peace and wellness

Rob & Gizmo

 

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