My Nan has Alzheimers ..

Hey iv popped over here from the depression forum, thought i would post here too. Well im 24 from UK and i have my nan living with me, she was diagnosed with Alzheimers about 5 years ago now. it hasnt been really bad, docs say because shes so active its held off, but the past couple of months have been really hard, im findin it hard to keep my temper, she is hard work! I work full time and i share the care with a cousin of mine - who gets paid for it! but as my cousin has children and i dont, she seems to leave all the work for me, she doesnt show her face from one day to the next unless she wants something! its getting me down, its all on my shoudlers. And at the moment my nan has such strong obsessions! the plugs have to all be turned off, wether we r in the room or not, im sick of findin the fridge turned off! all the lights in the house have to be off unless we r in the room, the house is in darkness!! all windows have to b locked even when we r in the house! she checks how hot the radiators are every two minutes,.. and much much more !! And my cousin doesnt work at all and her youngest just went to preschool so she has free days now.. but its me my nan rings beggin me to come home because she cant turn tv on or this n that!

She isnt fully dependant on me yet, she can go out on her own, shoppin and she goes bingo or visits the neighbours, but iv noticed that its gettin less and less.



arghhhhhhhhhhhhh !!!



sorry! i needed to vent it all out somehow! dont get me wrong, i love my nan to bits and i dont mind caring for her really, its just so hard at the moment, and i have my own problems too at the moment!



xxxxx

I hope she is on meds
I am really sorry that you are dealing with this and I really think it is time you put foot down to PAID cousinn and let her know you cannot come home from work all the time and you need the help.........

If your nan is not on any meds I would suggest a visit to her Doc or Neuro and get her on something it is starting to get out of hand for her and you
She doesnt realize what she is doing most of time with lights ect......
I know it has to be frustrating for all

Have you checked into RESPITE care for a day or 2 week so you have down time as well??
Please do stay wit us and keep us posted okay
LYN

hey, thanks howlyncat :)

Well no my nan isnt on meds for her Alzheimers, only ones for her Heart trouble and Anti-depressants, when she was diagnosed the doctor said she was too far gone for any meds to do her any good, said there was nothing they could give her, we didnt believe her so we went to my nans consultant who told us exactly the same, they said that she has past the early stages a long time ago so nothing would do any good, they say there is something for her when she is in the very late stages but nothing until then. Last year she was so bad with her obssesions and worryin about everything, she was always tryin to start a fight! so we went back to the doctors and theyv gave her anti-depressants to calm her down - they have worked thank god but she still has her moments!

As for the respite, iv tried talking to my family before about it but no one is interested they only want family to care for her but noone else can be bothered but me, i didnt really have a choice, my nan has always lived with my family but when i was 19 my parents decided they needed a bigger house and they moved out with my brothers and sister and i was told i HAD to stay here and look after nan, so here i am 5 years later still in the same situation.
Hope that all makes sense im in a rush lol

Thanks for ur replies :)

The Anit-depressant she is taking is called Mirtazapine.
I do get a break on a Sunday, one of my Aunts takes her out to bingo for the day and she has dinner there, and for two hours of a Monday she goes to an over 50s club and they take them out on day trips sometimes in the summer.
Its hard with the family because they dont see the changes in her everyday like i do, i have told them what shes like, i think deep down they know shes getting worse but they would rather believe she wasnt!
Shes 80 in August bless her

hey lyn,
Sorry to hear about your mum and dad, you sound like a wonderful person caring for your mom and now your dad.
I know what you mean with ur dad calling u by your mums name, my nan calls me every family members name going, last week it took me two hours to convince her that i had a younger brother, the only way i could get her to realise i did was to ask him to come visit her, when he came round it was like we hadnt even had the conversation, my brother thought i was messing with him when i told him!

I also think she is trying to hide how bad it is getting, when she forgets someone or something and we talk about it she then says 'oh yeah of course i know now' but i know really when i look at her face she still hasnt got a clue, so i just drop it. Like i say it has held off for years now but the last few months i have seen a lot of change in her it makes me sad. but she is so stuburn, she resists help anyway she can. We found out she has cataracts in one of her eyes, it is so simple to fix but shes refused it, she has got about 18 months and then it will HAVE to be sorted.

She isnt too well at the moment, she has a bad cold and said she feels under the weather.

anyways i best get back to work!!

Hi I've jumped over from depression, because a big part of my problem is my Mom w/alz. She is in the end statges, can't walk, pureed food, diapers it's so so upsetting.

hey catwhisperer, sorry to hear about ur mum ((( hugs ))) it must be very very hard for you to see ur mom going thru everything.. i find it upsettin with my nan but its not got that bad yet thankgod, just thinking about it getting that bad makes me cry
If u need to talk iv found it so helpful on here or u can mail me if u like

Hey lyn, how r u? iv been reading posts, your posts are very inspirational, very helpful, i enjoyed reading the ones where you spoke about ur mums happy place and ur memories of her

Things r ok i s'pose here, nan is over her cold now, back to her 'normal' self. She keeps losing things, she put my earings in a safe place so they didnt get lost, but she has forgotten where the safe place is.. gone forever now probably
The past couple of days she has been in a really good mood and has been feeling well in herself, is nice to see her happy, just waiting for the down!!
If u want to email me, iv added my addy to my profile
Best go sort dinner out for my nan.
Bye for now xxx

Lil Angel
Thanks for asking
I amnot doing to bad I am now trying to deal with my daughter Cait ...she has strep thraot and a viral infection in chest sounds kinda like a croup cough and hurts me to see her so sick and orn out ....giving her plenty of Vitamin "C" as well as other meds the doc ordered her for the temp and headaches /sore swollen thraot
One thing after another
BUT I know God never gives me more than I can handle right ,,,,,,,,,
My mom always put things away so they were " safe" lol but she never remembered where either
I have found plenty of things she stored away since she passed

I know I am the one that looks the most like Mom have her big brown eyes and most of her features so it does kinda throw dad off it hurts yet it also makes my heart swell at the same time .....does that make sense ........
Mom did and dad does same thing about convos he will say Oh ya I remember now but like you say just one look at their faces tells you different
Most times it is better to go to their world ......it wont hurt them and somehow it helps the connection IMO..
I am sure others would differ but I have always done this even when in Nursing so habit is hard to break and I feel it is a good one anyways for me ......

So sorry about your Nan and I sure hope she doesnt catch this horrid viral thing gaoing around all over the world right now (even flu shot is not preventing it ) ...........just make sure she is well hydrated and if not to hungrgy make her those shakes and the ice cream wont hurt

If no allergies to Peanut butter you can make really quick n easy SOFT PB cookies full of many nutrients for her
1 egg
1 cup of peanut butter
1 cup of sugar

Mix with a fork and spoon onto a tray cook at 350 degrees for 6 to 8 minutes
** dont press them down let the spoonful just be on the tray **
I made these all the time for mom and make them occasionally for dad
Daughter loves them too
Thoughts and prayers are with you and your sweet nan
God Bless
LYN

Hey Lyn,
Not long got in from work, shattered! Things are going great with nan, shes been in a really good mood past couple of days, its been lovely, can have proper conversations with her, although more and more things keep getting put in a 'safe' place eyes . And she gave up smoking about 10 years ago due to medical problems, but recently she keeps telling me shes craving for one.

Things arent too good with me, depression and other things are getting to me at the moment, s'pose its everything getting on top of me. Just feeling really down sad



Sorry to hear about ur daughter being ill, hope she gets better soon.

How are things with you and your dad?

Thanks for that recipe, will have to try it



xxxxx

Hiyas, sorry its been so long ! things have been pretty rubbish lately for me and last week the one night i get to go out some grrrrr person decides to spike my drink, i ended up collapsing in the toilets and an ambulance was called. i was in hospital for ages!! i dont remember most of what happened, just a blur really. so i went away in the week for a few days to chill out, got back lastnight. Nan is ok, she was upset tht i didnt come home from the pub when i told her i would but one of my family members had to come and sit with her til she went to sleep. hope everyone is doin ok, hows u LYN?

xxxx

I dont remember much about the whole night, but thats what the drug does to you, was horrible, i just remember being very scared and not knowing what to do. i was so ill for a few days after, i havnt drank alcohol since, kinda put me off lol - mayb thats a good thing lol.


Was good to get away, even though i rang my nan everyday to check she was ok lol, but i had a good time.

darn back to work 2moro after having a week off



Wheres Cait going?
I sent u an email, im not sure if u got it because my laptop if playin up on me at the mo and it froze while it was sending! grrrr lol.

xxx

Dear Holyncat

I am sorry that you are feeling so sick.

How are you making out Lil Angel, Catwhispers and Kitt??