Father recently diagnosed with Alzheimers

My Father was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer's, at first before we knew he had it, there were some signs that we thought something maybe wrong with his memory, but he functioned very well, walked 4 miles every day, was always gong somewhere, very active.

Just in the last couple of months you can see a decline in him, he has to ask how old he is, he repeatedly asks what the day, year, month etc.

He was in the hospital last month for a bleeding ulcer, and apparently he has a very rough time at night, the nurse said he has "sundowners syndrome", his gets worse at night, my Mom says he gets up and down a lot during the night checking for his wallet and check book.

He barely will do anything anymore, he usually just sits by my Mom, and repeatedly tells her how much he loves her, and how beautiful her hair is, he is not the same man I knew, my heart breaks for him, I have taken this so very bad, I never really understood Alzheimers and the devastation it can cause, I sure wish I never found out!

Do your parents dance, or have another activity they did together?

My wife has forgotten a lot of things, but she hangs on to some things that mean the most to her. One of them is dancing. She has been an expert dancer since her teenaged years. I take her dancing three times a week and it makes her very happy because she holds on to the memory long enough for the next night I take her out.

If your father has one activity that he hasn't forgotten, his wife can help him a lot by doing it with him. If that activity is mainly walking, perhaps she can join him. Four miles is a long walk, so maybe she can get him to shorten the walk to whatever is comfortable for her. It will give him a chance to have happy memories with her that will hopefully last to the next walk....

Brenda - the sad part is it's going to get worse.

You'll quickly learn to NOT argue with him. If he thinks he's right about a subject - just agree with him...as long as it's not a really important subject.

When he asks about Christmas - just tell him it'll be here before he knows it... The good news here is that tomorrow he'll forget he asked about Christmas.

The hard part - my dad for example is three times more sharp in the morning than he is in the afternoon. He knows his memory is shot and he can have quite a discussion about it. In the afternoon he doesn't know where he is and who the people around him are.

I am so sorry, Brenda! It hurts so bad to watch the ones we love struggle. Treasure the good moments, you are clearly a very loving and caring daughter. Do you all have lots of local support with friends and family? HUGS!!

~Ducktapetherapy77