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Roll Call........How is Everyone doing

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Anxiety & Panic Disorders
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Posted 11/2/2008 3:48 PM (GMT 0)
I would love to hear from you how your doing. I know the members would like to read updates too. Post a note or two so we can keep track of you.

This is Kitt and I have had A & P for 26 years. I also have depression so I do have to work hard at staying in the moment.

I take Cymbalta 60 mg, Valium 2 - 4 mg/daily and Trazodone 100 mg at bedtime.

I am naturally a fun loving person and I like to put a smile on someones face. This last couple of weeks have been a rough ride for me. I have a Sister with ovarian cancer.

I come here daily and talk to all of you because it helps me and also I am a caregiver so I hope we are in a win - win situation.

I live in the Midwest, have 4 children and 7 grandchildren and 2 great grandchildren...........how can that be, I am only 55? I have a wonderful hubby too, he is my rock.

Ok, next up, are you around Big Sis?

Kitt
Posted 11/2/2008 4:06 PM (GMT 0)
Hello!!!
My name is Sam and I've been dealing with A&P for 20 plus years. . . Like Kitt I have to work hard staying in the moment also due to depressionsmile I'm on Clonzepam 2mg daily plus multi vitamins, and a Tylenol 3 when the pain becomes intense from my costo smile I am currently goin through CBT, Tapping, and other programs like the one from the Midwest Center for Anxiety and Depression, and I've noticed a huge difference within a week, since I just started confronting my problems head on since last Sunday when I ended up in the hospital for a panic attacksmile I'm doing great now, and I'm very happy about the progress I've made so far. . . . .Anyway, I love to come on here to visit with people. . . It is really good therapy for all of ussmile This Roll Call is just another thing to help us all maintain a feeling of family and community smile Thanks Kitt for getting this going, it has already brightened my day to unload some thoughts before I do anything else smile Take care all.
Posted 11/2/2008 5:34 PM (GMT 0)

I am 32 YOA and have been expericencing Health A/P for two years now and have also had GERD for the same amount of time.  I take Citalopram (celexa) each day and omeprozole for GERD each day.  I have received much help from this forum and reading that I am not alone in what I experience.  My A/P triggers are feeling a sense of pain in my chest or arms and driving.  I work on several different techniques to calm myself.  I am interested to know what the Midwest Center for Anxiety and Depression is and where it is located.

I like KITT live in the midwest, however a bit more rural that her, which doesn't help my health anxiety since hospitals are few and far between.  I get stinkin thinkin thoughts when a hospital is not within quick access, even though I know I don't need a hospital I just need to calm down. 

I like the idea of having a Roll call.  I don't come to the forum each day.  I find myself coming on line when I am having a bad day and needing a pick-me-up.

CC

Posted 11/2/2008 5:51 PM (GMT 0)
Hello everyone.... Good idea Kitt! oh Wise One! hehehe.
My name is Mary, I am 51 years old, have two beautiful daughters, one gorgeous grandaughter and a tall handsome 'son in law'( soon to be).( not that I am biased in any way!,but I think I have the best looking family and of course, they all take after their mom and grandmom! ) I suffer from general anxiety , Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Depression, Crohn's disease among other things.
My PTSD and Depression are giving me a real merry go ride lately. Some weeks are very,very bad and others are endurable. For the most part I tend to be the person that everyone calls when they need a morale booster... or a good laugh.... I love to make people laugh and am known for always having a big old smile for everyone I meet . Friends will cancel events if I can't make it because they say it won't be any 'fun' without me... I'm kinda of proud of that quality, which both my girls have inherited.( and which I got from my dear mom)... so as much as there is crying in my house... there is usally as much, or more laughing.!
This family at Healing Well... has gotten me through sooooo many hard times... they have literally 'pushed me back up the hill... back into the Light! "
I love to read other posts and have in the past spent a lot of time answering them...but lately have lost my confidence... .
But I am working!!! hard!!!! pushing myself ... with everyone's help.... posting on 'roll call' is another little step towards healing and feeling better about me.
Sending healing thoughts and prayers to all of you . Don't know what I'd do without YOU!!!!!.
Mary
Posted 11/2/2008 6:01 PM (GMT 0)
Great Everyone, really great stuff.

Mary we need to find your confidence so email me if you would like to.

Kitt
Posted 11/2/2008 6:10 PM (GMT 0)
Yep Big sis here.........
Just made da pottyyyyyyyy.........lol

.....Great thread idea lil sis idea

I am Lyn.have dealt with a/p for 30 plus yrs

I also take Valium PRN and trazadone to sleep

Morphine and percocets for in between pain

( .See Dx's)

.....54 yrs old have had 3 children one passed away at 6 yrs old

.Have a 34 yr old son and a teen daughter who I love to pieces

turn 2 GK's ...Kyle an d Kassidy

I have lost both my parents in the last 2 plus yrs

Have gone thru alot in my time here and prior to

joining HW

Dx with Crohns ....Pyoderma Gangrenosum ( bullous)

And now just recently

Fibromyagia

Just had surgury and I am doing okay by the great support and love of my HW family

Lil sis

You have helped more than you will ever know...Loves..Big sis

Sweet Megs ....Percycat....Ben .......Ian........Mary....Sherrine .....Rosie..Sniper..VV..C2..Navy..Nanners,Keah

Wow there are soooo many to name



Know I have not left anyone out on purpose

I DO appreciate ALL you's have done for me

yeah

I am okay today other than a few real like QUICK potty runs ........



Everyone has given mne a purpose and a reason to go on each day

Knowing the sun will still rise is the best.........

NO matter how rough I may feel

And have my talks with Lil sis .........Love ya tons...Big sis



cry Yep I have cried and I have smilewinkgrin

Thru many a thread and many a problem

KNOW that it can get and will get better
Posted 11/2/2008 6:30 PM (GMT 0)
Hi I am Gail *Nanners* and I have lived 33 years with Crohns Disease and just this past year or two started suffering with anticipatory anxiety associated with my Crohns. I am currently in remission with my Crohns and seem to have gained control over my anxiety some with the occasional Xanax .25 mg to help. I am married to the most loving and compassionate man and have been for the past 9 years. I have 3 grown daughters, 5 incredible grandbabies, and including my amazing husband, what more could I ask for. Thanks to Skitt, Lyn and Meg who have been so helpful in helping me to understand and move thru my anxiety. I love you all bunches!!!

Gail *Nanners*
Posted 11/2/2008 7:28 PM (GMT 0)
Hi, I'm Scat. I'm 21. I've been dealing with anxiety and panic since I was 7 and depression since I was 10. I was diagnosed with psychotic depression at 14 and panic disorder is a relatively new label for me! I'm taking citalopram to tackle both the current episode of depression and the panic disorder. I've been having a rough time lately and I'm seeing my GP this week to discuss upping the dose of the citalopram, on my therapist's instructions.

I also have rheumatoid arthritis, which is currently in remission. It still flares but is no longer just one big flare. All the meds I take for that are in my signature!

Otherwise, I'm a university student studying English Literature. I'm from England and I study in Wales. I'm in the final year of my degree, hoping to go on and do a masters and doctorate in medieval studies. When I'm not at uni I live with my parents and my younger brother.

I check these forums daily, although I don't always post. It is reassuring to see that I'm not mad and that other people know what is happening to my mind and body.
Posted 11/2/2008 8:56 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Everyone, I'm 37 and was diagnosed with Crohn's disease 12 years ago. I've dealt with anxiety for as long as I can remember but did not truly have panic problems until taking prednisone for the CD for about 2.5 years. Having a chronic illness definitely creates lots of anxiety and makes it easy to assume the worst about things, but I want to begin to see things in a more positive light. Currently I am dealing with a couple of additional physical problems, hopefully minor, and trying to keep my chin up knowing that care is there for me if I am brave enough to ask for it instead of creating worst-case situations in my mind. I grew up with a mother with high expectations for whom illness is an unwanted nuisance, and I am trying to learn that it is okay to take the time to look after myself, that I am not a burden to others when I ask for help. It is hard for me to tell my family and friends when I am having problems because I feel like I am imposing on them, and I am trying to get past this and understand that anyone can feel anxious about not feeling well and need to share with others in order to feel better about things.
Posted 11/3/2008 3:08 AM (GMT 0)
Hi everyone,

I'm 42, also live in the Midwest, and have lived with panic/anxiety disorder and on again off again agoraphobia for almost 19 years.  I've been through the worst of it on several occassions, but always manage, with the help of therapy, meds and the people here, to pull myself through once again.  I'm doing fairly well right now, just finished two years of therapy with an amazing woman who gave me the guidance to discover and learn to deal with many issues in my life.  Sadly, we said goodbye two weeks ago, and I'm still adjusting to the fact that I won't be seeing her every two weeks.  Not easy, little scary!

I'm feeling good, getting out quite a bit, driving again, something I haven't done in many, many years, and just thinking much more positively than ever before.  My anxiety is really at a low level, very maneageable, which is such a relief and when it does flare up, it doesn't seem to bother me as much as it used too.  I finally think I'm moving in the right direction.  I'm still on xanax, daily, and probably will be forever as the doctor who gives me meds has told me.  Though I don't like taking meds, I've accepted that it is a necessary part of my life.

I think the only big issue I still have is not having any friends.  Over the last 19 years of dealing with all of this, I've lost contact with any friends I had, my doing, not theirs.  Just felt so ashamed and overwhelmed that it was easier to withdraw than to open up to others.  So it's lonely, especially since both my husband and daughter work all day and I'm alone alot, just me and my little dog Buster.  Next thing I have to work on I guess...making friends.  Hope I remember how! 

Love this thread Kitt, it's so nice to catch up with everyone who's been here a while and to learn something about all of the new members.

Posted 11/3/2008 5:54 AM (GMT 0)
Hi, im Maz. Im 28. been battling A/P since age 10. also agoraphobia, mild ocd, s.a.d. CFS & Fibro. PCOD & endometriosis.


im a high school teacher, believer, painter, survivor, tomboy, child of God. im on Zoloft 150mgs and Xanax 4mgs. plus pain relief, anti-inflammatories etc.

i have found being hit with severe A/P at 10yrs has actually made me a stronger and more empathetic person. i began a career in nursing, but kept failing chemistry, so switched and ended up nursing my way thru my teaching degree. i was in oncology/palliative care for 5 years. i have problems with my meds, esp Xanax- i used to take it far more than what was prescribed as a coping mechanism, and i liked the feeling, so now i pick up 1 weeks worth at a time in a 'webster' pack, from my local chemist. im great at numbing reality which is a terrible thing, however the webster pack stops me from messing with the Xanax dosage. anything that numbs the pain is good (except alcohol, never liked it). doing my best to get back on track and eliminate the additional 'self medicating'. its just such a long term habit.

i still struggle to work full time and my agoraphobia is limiting but im taking baby steps. im also on an excellent diet, trying to shed my 'zoloft' fat, as i nicknamed it. i am 5'11 and used to weigh 60kg. then they changed me to Zoloft, whipped out my gall bladder, and bam! i put on nearly 30kg in 3 months. i got dumped for being fat (superficial jerk...) and my body image has taken a beating. i was always the popular life of the party, but my weight gain turned me into a hermit, as insensitive friends have made remarks and comments about me 'letting myself go'. im still the same person! just in a bigger body- dont they think i cant see the difference? i dont need to be reminded.

anyway, life is a struggle, but life is worth it. all things work together for good. my faith has kept me sane.



Maz XX
Posted 11/3/2008 11:43 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks all for opening your hearts and telling us about you .........

I am doing okay this am
Went for a bvike ride with Cait last night

Nearly broke me bummy

Loves to all

LYN

Keep sharing
Posted 11/3/2008 1:10 PM (GMT 0)
Hi im badfish 23 years young :P

I think i had a problem with anxiety my whole life but only developed major problem with it 2 years ago whilst studying for my finals at Uni. Got it under relative control but i know im stil learning to cope with this. Too many names too mention as regards ppl who have help get thru me thru things but i thank you all.

Dont really know wht else to say... other than i really enjoy being of HW family here and its always good to talk to ppl who can understand and empathise with your problems.

Thanks Everyone

Badfish
Posted 11/3/2008 11:55 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Im Claire 31, and im from suffolk in the UK. I found this site a few weeks ago and have posted quite a few times now. I have had anxiety all my life and had my 1st PA when I was pregnant and 16. I have suffered on and off in severity but lately I have been feeling at my worst. Since finally giving in and going to the GP who prescribed me valium (have never had that before! scared of meds) I have felt alot better as I was having PA that lasred hours, so scary and so draining! My current fear has been of going mad and losing control of myself......sooooooo scarey. But I am able to rationalise it alot more now.

HW family has been a lifeline for me, reading other ppls posts and also joining in.

Thank you x
Posted 11/4/2008 4:35 AM (GMT 0)
I'm Sam. I'm 19 (almost 20) and from MN. I was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis in 2005 and I'm definitely not new to healingwell. I'm currently a sophomore in college as a cytotechnology major but I am soon transferring after a major anxiety freak out. I've been dealing with anxieties most of my life and it seems to run in my family. I'm on effexor for GAD but I probably having OCD and SAD thrown in there too. I'm the youngest in my family and I have two much older brothers who are now married and having kids. I'll be an auntie again in December! I'm a major biology nerd and I could spend all day reading about it. I absolutely love my two shetland sheepdogs and I love love love the Minnesota Wild!
I don't know what I would do without healingwell. It was a godsend when I started my UC battle and now that I'm heading full force into this anxiety battle I'm so glad to have a place to turn to smile
Posted 11/4/2008 9:50 AM (GMT 0)
Hey sbauer im a major biology too :P
Posted 11/4/2008 3:45 PM (GMT 0)
Hey Sam,

Howdy my MN neighbor............it is a big state. I am glad to hear you are transferring if you had some problems. It is ok to change your mind.

I have been spending a lot of time at the U of MN and feel like a student without any classes, I just walk around the campus. My sister was transferred to the U of MN Hospital on 8/13 and has been up there all this time. When she is not in the hospital she stays at Hope Lodge.

What a great place that is.

Thank you for checking in and know that we are always here.

Kitt
Posted 11/4/2008 4:25 PM (GMT 0)
Gotta love MN! Isn't the weather CRAZY right now!?
Posted 11/4/2008 4:44 PM (GMT 0)

Snowstorm is a blowing this way................got the snow blower ready and enough Diet Coke on store to see me through anything the weather man wants to throw at us.

Kitt  :)

Posted 11/4/2008 4:51 PM (GMT 0)
Hey Everyone

Im Eddie, im 20 yrs old and i was diagnosed with Hypothyroidism about 6 months ago and i have been suffering from A/P disorder pretty much since then.
I am currently attending Chemeketa Community College, hopefully by this time next year i will be attending Oregon State University, i havent really decided yet what i will be majoring in, i plan to go to med school after college so i was thinking about majoring in the sciences, but i was actually told i would be better off majoring in either history, philosophy or english and minoring in biochemistry. This year has definitely been tough for me, ive been trying to stay on top of my school work and at the same time dealing with hypothyroid and A/P Disorder, i have my good weeks bad weeks and really really bad, these past couple of weeks have been really bad :( but i always know i come to HW for help, i always feel loads better by just coming here and reading what others have to say!!! :)
Posted 11/4/2008 8:04 PM (GMT 0)
I am one gigantic pity party today and can't seem to get past it.
Posted 11/5/2008 12:15 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Kitt, what a beautiful and happy family you have! Thank you for sharing them with us... Kayla's picture brings back memories of my own pink prom years ago.
Posted 11/5/2008 12:54 AM (GMT 0)
Kitt I know it! It was 70 degrees where I am today and its supposed to be 39 and snowy Friday! I'm not ready for snow yet!!!
Posted 11/5/2008 5:18 AM (GMT 0)
hi my name is shell I have had a&p for 5 yrs now I have depression to I try to look at the good side but im scared of every thing any more. I haven't taken my effexor in 4 days cause im scared its going to do something to me.
Posted 11/5/2008 10:47 AM (GMT 0)
im struggling. i have a wealth of physical health probs- and my fibromyalgia is agitating me. im in severe, chronic pain that is disrupting/interfering with my abilty to do basic, daily simple chores. its also messing with my sleep big time, which makes me anxious. im emotionally freakin a bit because i have debts that need to be paid off- my college loans, my credit cards (which i have susequently chopped up)- its always about money. if i didnt have so much debt (my fault, i know) then i wouldnt work a full time job. id take it a bit easier and rest up. i just seem to lurch from one medical disaster to another. i need 2 lots of surgery early next yr, and am stressing bout time off work, and the insurance gap i will have to cover. my agoraphobia has crept back in to my life and is entrapping me- i am not house bound or anything, but i avoid alot of situations because of the panic i feel.

its overwhelming sometimes. im doing my best.

Maz XX
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