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Posted 3/26/2009 10:38 PM (GMT 0)

OKAY so i had surgery to correct a deviated septum 5 weeks and 2 days ago. I have never broken a bone or had any kind of surgery before in my life - everyone told me this wasnt a big deal and id be fine. turned out the doctor had to break the upper bone in three places, cut the cartlidge, and break the lower bone too.

I was really scared going in but the day after i felt fine and was just really happy it was over...but then the next day i had this really bad reaction to the pain killers and FREAKED OUT i thought i was being electricuted and was going to die. Luckily my dad knew what to do and calmed me down. after that i was sooo anxious 100% of the time. Every morning i would wake up and feel like i had this horrible nightmare and it wasnt a nightmare. obviously people aren't going to feel 100% after they have their nose broken in like six places and repositioned but i am really not dealing with it well. I am getting better, i cant tell day by day but if i compare this week to 5 weeks ago ive definitely gotten better.

I have gone to the doctor so many times he perscribed clonazepam because i keep having panic attacks and ive also started seeing a psychologist. My psychologist says she doesnt think im depressed but in the last few days i wake up and just feel miserable. the clonazepam is helping but i cant tell if i just feel miserable because all the enegry in my body is trying to heal my busted face or if im actually depressed.

I used to be so happy and carefree. I never used to worry about anything at all and now it's all i do. I thought i had meningitis, i thought i was going blind, i thought i had a sinus infection, i thought i had permanent splitting pain from nevre damage and now im SO SCARED that im depressed and that im going to stay depressed after im healthy and healed. I keep thinking that once im better my mind will go back to normal too but im devastated thinking that ive been so traumatized and ill never be the same. i dont want to go on antidepressants too because ive heard that clonazepam is hard enough to get off of and also that antidepressants make you feel "numb"..like you're never really high or really low...and i really loved my life before all this and when i start to feel better i want to know its because im actually getting better and not because of antidepressants.

is this normal after surgery? do you think ill go back to normal? :( i really really really hope so

i also feel hopeless because i want to heal fast but i dont know what to do to make that happen besides wait....im just so upset.

thanks so much if you can help me

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Posted 3/26/2009 11:53 PM (GMT 0)
Hmm... I'm not really sure what advice I can give you. I've had surgery (to remove a mass and my right ovary)... But how a person deals with surgery probably varies from person to person and surgery to surgery. I think it is normal to feel depressed after surgery because of the pain from the surgical area wearing you down... and having to restrict your activities.

Have you talked to your doctor about feeling depressed? I know you don't want to go on antidepressants, but sometimes, it can really help... I've only taken a couple of different antidepressants in my lifetime (Paxil and prozac)... Neither produced a numb feeling in me... (I got off the Paxil a looooooong time ago because it used to give me really bad headaches)...

It can be hard, after your health has taken a major hit, to get to feeling back to normal emotionally without some form of counseling... But again, this is the sort of thing that varies from person to person...

I think it would help, for starters, if you didn't confine yourself to thinking that you'll never get through this... You'll create a self-fulfilling prophecy that way.

And healing after surgery takes time... You're not going to get out of surgery and automatically feel great... It takes a while. After you heal up, you'll probably feel a lot better physically... :)
Posted 3/27/2009 12:35 AM (GMT 0)
Always Love,

I have a girlfriend whose husband had surgery and had very bad nervous reactions after the fact. His doctor explained to him that surgery can be a real shock to the central nervous system, and people can have any number of unusual reactions. The aftereffects went away several weeks later....if I recall correctly, my friend said it was about 8 weeks. He is definitely back to his normal self now. I hope this is helpful to you in some way. In the meantime, try to allow yourself time to heal....be patient with yourself and your body....and trust your body to heal itself. We are all individuals that have our own reactions and schedules for healing, but I feel very strongly that you WILL be feeling back to normal more and more as the healing progresses. Keep talking to your psychologist about this and ask her for suggestions as to what you can do to help yourself, whether it be certain books or articles you can read, affirmations you can say to yourself, or activities you can engage in that will use your mind in a positive way. I wish you the very best. Please continue to let us know how you are doing, okay? :-)
Posted 3/27/2009 2:48 AM (GMT 0)
Always Love,

I know what your going threw. I myself do the same thing after surgery. I've had 3 c-sections. And the first one I did ok. It took me 8 weeks to recover and go back to work. The second one took me less time. And the 3rd I was begging to go back to work at 4 weeks.

With the first one. I was depressed. I felt useless and helpless. I cried a lot and panick attacks. All around my life felt like it was just totally just there to make my feel like garbage. I was 19, married and I had moved in with my parents after the surgery.
Your body just went through a major trauma. And it takes time for your body to heal. Even longer for you yourself to accept it. Your body goes into over drive trying to heal itself. Sometimes that energy that your body is producing can be overwhelming.
Just remember your body is healing. And it will take resources it needs from other places to make the injured area heal. So allow your body the time it needs to heal. Take a deep breath and remind yourself your body is healing. It will do what it needs to on its own.

When I had my wisdom teeth pulled +2. I slept for 2 weeks straight. I woke up to take my meds and then went right back to sleep. Every couple of days I ate a bowl of ice cream. I did better sleeping it off then trying to fight it. My dentist was right for making sure I slept as much as possible. She also instructed my husband to not allow me to read the warnings on the pills. After I was off the meds I looked them up online. Again she was a smart cookie. I wouldn't of touched them with a 10 foot pole.

Give it time . You will recover when your body is ready.
Posted 3/27/2009 3:39 PM (GMT 0)
Celey, Raniah and Allestaria...thanks so much. Raniah im such a basket case i cried when i read yours because it made me feel so much better. I just keep freaking myself out thinking i'll never be better or that i can't stand waiting anymore and im going to go crazy....
Allestaria did you get back to normal completely?? i feel like it's been so long since i felt normal that i wont ever be able to get there again, i hope im wrong :(.

I feel like ive had a really bad flu for 5+ weeks and its making me crazzzy!! Every morning now i wake up and i feel like im hungover or something...like just miserable and gross and like "whhhy did i drink so much last night" but instead its "whhyyy did i ruin my life by getting this surgery". I dont want to think i ruined my life its just the feeling i have when i wake up it sucks so much! but it sounds like it will go away. i pray and hope and wish it will go away.i just want to be happy again so badly :( and healthy :( :(

is it normal to feel so tired and gross for a while after surgery? i wish i had known all of this before hand so i could have been more prepared.

thanks for being here...

Post Edited (alwayslove) : 3/27/2009 9:47:47 AM (GMT-6)

Posted 3/27/2009 6:28 PM (GMT 0)
First off, it is VERY, VERY normal to feel the way you do! ANYTHING that has to do with our noses affects our mood, and more importantly, our nervous system, and having the type of surgery you had it's absolutely no surprise that you're feeling so off! Just consider how run down and unhappy we feel when we have a cold!

There's a bundle of nerves right behind our nose, and the swelling, etc. has no doubt affected that area. In fact, self defense classes often encourage blows to the nose as a way of scrambling up an attackers senses.

Throw in some pain meds and the healing process and the demands it places on our minds and bodies, and it's easy to see why you are so taxed right now. But you know what? You WILL get past this, and you will feel better, I PROMISE! =)

We're here for you, and for each other... please let us know how things are going so we can share in your success.

Ross
Posted 3/27/2009 7:07 PM (GMT 0)
ross, thanks so much thats really comforting!!! in the last few days i think i've been feeling better but it does make me nervous when i read things like "it can take up to a year for all the swelling to go down"...everytime i try to google stuff about broken noses it comes up with a lot of rhinoplasty cases where people are worried because they dont like how their nose looks and people write back to them "it can take up to a year..." and i start to panic because i dont know what i'd do if its going to take a year!!!! i got mine done completel for medical reasons.. hopefully the swelling in the nerves behind my nose will get better before my actual nose unswells...i dont even care what i look like at all anymore im completely cured of any vanity i might have had before......
surgery sucks :( but i heard people start feeling back to normal after "several weeks" and im almost at 6 so any time now i pray!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks ross you're so nice<3!
Posted 3/27/2009 7:51 PM (GMT 0)

Always-Love,

i have had the exact same surgery 18months ago. At the time they fixed my deviated septum, they also went up through my nose with a chisel and a surgical drill, and drilled bigger sinus passages behind my cheekbones due to my acute sinusitus. i lost a lot of blood on the table and had to be transfused.

My nose and cheekbones were both broken in several places. The pain was phenomenal. I have had 9 surgeries previous to this and am not afraid of hospitals or procedures, im used to it.

But the pain from the sinus/septum surgery was awful and it took a long time to heal. I was on IV Fentanyl & Pethadine but still felt like my face had been bashed in. Although i do not personally get depressed after surgery, i can totally understand why people might. the pain alone is a big factor. i think once you heal you will feel better mentally.

I used to be a nurse and had many patients who would be depressed after surgery- i think for some people, its traumatic. For me, its a way of life and having a general anaesthetic is the best sleep ever! rolleyes   but please hang in there, it WILL improve.

My doc and i are trying to schedule my next lot of surgery for ovarian cyst removal- i choose not to focus on the pain, and focus on the long term result.

Take care and feel better,

Maz XX

Posted 3/27/2009 8:40 PM (GMT 0)
mazfire...how long until you felt better? your post makes me kind of nervous :S i dont know how much longer i can wait im hoping itll be soon......more than 2 months? please dont tell me more than 2 months! thanks for the encouragement that it will get better, and i think your attitude is great im very jealous! im thankful that i didnt have my cheekbones broken i can imagine how painful that would be..good luck with your upcoming surgery as well!
Posted 3/27/2009 8:44 PM (GMT 0)

6-8 weeks for actual nose to heal. longer for the sinus passages. you have done the hard yards already, the worst is over. hang in there, you should start to feel better soon. its a frustrating process i know.

Maz XX

Posted 3/27/2009 8:48 PM (GMT 0)
thanks maz <3
Posted 3/27/2009 9:06 PM (GMT 0)
You are very welcome, and I'm happy that the information helped you! =)

I know it's easy to say, but please don't worry. We can ALWAYS find things to frighten ourselves with on the net, but reality almost always turns out to be not nearly as bad as we imagine it to be, especially where the future is concerned. The fact that you are starting to feel better is a good sign... I doubt seriously that you will be a long-term nosificarian (I just made that up! HAHA!).

Just think of how wonderful it will be when you're all healed up and you don't have the problems you used to have! Won't that be wonderful? Think of how much more you will be able to enjoy things...

You're are doing great and things will get better every day. Just remember that you can only deal with right now, and thinking about how much more you have to go through is kind of like trying to eat every meal you'd ever eat in the next few weeks. You just can't do it! You can only eat the meal that's in front of you now. I hope this makes sense to you... I often have to remind myself of this whenever I'm feeling overwhelmed, and it helps me.

Ross
Posted 3/27/2009 10:47 PM (GMT 0)
thanks ross that's so true about the meals lol....right now mine tastes like stale bread and lukewarm water haha...at least its not like rotten meat like last month!! and if there was a chance that i could develop the imaginary long-term nosificarian disease im sure id think i had it! hahaha...maybe next week will be my week!hope sooooooo.....
i have a completely new outlook on life, a headache that wont go away for 5 weeks and 3 days and counting really puts things into perspective.
i was going through school to be a teacher but now im pretty sure im going to switch majors and try to cure cancer or something lol..i can't believe how strong some people are, anybody with a chronic illness or chronic pain has ALLLL my sympathy!!! you people are amazing
Posted 3/27/2009 11:16 PM (GMT 0)
sometimes i start to think about how i got my face cut away at and i start to feel really hot and get so scared and cant believe it actually happened and im so afraid right now that im not going to get better. i know im going to so its irrational but in my head i just cant convice myself that i will ever recover...i have moments when i feel normal and then my headache comes back and i just want to cry and cry and crrry and crying makes it worse so then i start to panic because theres nothing i can do i just want to pull my hair out and scream until its all over!!!!!!!!
Posted 3/27/2009 11:38 PM (GMT 0)
Hey Always, it's Raniah again. I hate to see you suffering in this way. Is there anything at all that will give you some enjoyment at this time? I hope you don't mind me saying so, but when I get into a tailspin like that.....when I just can't seem to stop thinking about what's bothering me....I finally have to force myself to take up some sort of distraction, preferably one that gives me some pleasure and some peace. I know...easier said than done, right? However, you really need to be kind to yourself right now. Do something that will calm you, and take your mind off all of this physical trauma. Read something that is not related to medicine or health (or noses!). Take a relaxing bath, with some bath salts or bath oil if you like. Play some soft music while you're in there! And light a pretty candle or two. Think of the most beautiful place you have ever been, and close your eyes, and imagine you are there. If it is a field, try to remember how the grass feels under your feet, and how the breeze feels against your skin. Think of a person you would like to have with you, and imagine what they would say to you. Allow yourself to get lost in happy thoughts for a little bit. I think you know what I mean. It's all going to be okay, my friend. Sometimes we just need to help ourselves along the way. :-)
Posted 3/28/2009 3:02 AM (GMT 0)

The surgery is in the past. the pain and discomfort is temporary. the benefits are long term.

 Keep telling yourself that.

Maz XX

Posted 3/28/2009 3:11 AM (GMT 0)
hi :) thanks raniah i will try that next time i start to freak out.....i just took a clonazepam and im feeling pretty good right noww :) maybe tomorrow when i think im going to die i'll read this and remember that there are moments when it doesnt feel like my heads going to explode and soon most moments will be like that! you guys are all so nice im happy i found you :)
sweet dreams from ontario!xoxox
Posted 3/28/2009 1:59 PM (GMT 0)
does anybody know if clonazepam can cause you to have bad dreams? I keep having these really vivid dreams that my boyfriend is cheating on me or my mom is dead or my sister is dating my ex or just unsetteling things like that........i was only taking half a clonaz every night and then the doc upped my dose to a whole one...ever since i started taking the whole one i wake up and feel hung over, so last night i only took half and had a dream that my boyfriend was cheating on me and i woke up feeling ANXIOUS! i just cant find a balance :( i either wake up depressed and had no dreams or i wake up after having a bad dream and feel anxious :( maybe the dreams are just from spending the whole day on edge.............i dont even like having normal dreams
Posted 3/28/2009 3:22 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Always,

I don't have any knowledge of the side effects of Clonazepam, but I do know that when I'm struggling with anxiety, I often have very upsetting dreams and wake up in a panic. Perhaps you should check in with your doc and ask about this issue. And talk to your psychologist about it, too. And most of all, try to find something you can turn to when you wake up that will put your mind on something positive. I keep my little stock of feel-good books and movies nearby for these occasions, and I also use relaxing music and breathing techniques to help me to calm down. I know it's tough to keep yourself from all these thoughts when you're not able to do the full range of activities because you're recovering from surgery, but try to get creative and think of ways to redirect your thoughts as best you can. What kinds of things do you find enjoyable that you could do upon waking? Keep us posted, because it does help to talk things out. We're here for you!
Posted 3/28/2009 7:20 PM (GMT 0)
I've taken clonazepam... and I'm usually pretty sensitive to what goes on in my dreams when I'm taking different medicine (I think taking Darvocet has got to have had the most interesting and disturbing effects on my dreams ever). I have to say that clonazepam hasn't caused me any problems in that front. I think it is probably your anxiety. When anxiety is high, and you're able to enter REM mode, then you're going to have bad dreams. I know this because I was a very anxious kid growing up, and I used to have extremely bad nightmares and night terrors (used to wake up crying and/or screaming in the middle of the night, which would wake other people in the house up)...
Posted 3/28/2009 7:30 PM (GMT 0)
thanks guys. i just can't wait to be better again but i know i just have to......
maz did you have the bones at the top of your nose broken too? ifeel like im in a nightmarrrrre...but i know i'll wake up soon and it'll all be over. i know it i know it i know it.
Celey, thank you im happy to hear that. i don't want to stop taking the clonazepam...maybe once im on it for a little longer and it helps more with the anxiety the dreams will get better....

today i decided that i hate dreams lol. any kind! good or bad! i just want to go to sleep and wake up and feel rested and refreshed!!! man i miss that!
5 weeks and 4 days since surg and counttttinng..
Posted 3/29/2009 10:17 PM (GMT 0)
Alwayslove I feel your pain. I have major Health anxiety and agoraphobia, but a year ago I slipt on some ice and broke my leg. I was laying outside for about 15 min in -30 degree weather. I had to pull myself to the street for help. I ended up getting a steel rod implanted in my leg. To this day I get flashbacks and get scared about walking in the winter. The good thing is it is something that can and was fixed the hard part is the post traumatic stuff. Give it time it sounds like you are going thru the normal recovery process.
Posted 3/30/2009 12:10 AM (GMT 0)
im having this problem....andi dont know if it's just a part of the healing process.,..but it seems like i keep trading one bad thing for another......last week i was getting stabbing pains behind my eyes and now they're a lot duller and can attack the sides of my head or right where my nose was broken and i feel SOOOOOOO light headed...i feel like im going to pass out at any moment or like my brain is just going to spasm and ill fall over dead.


crazy right???? Ross i loved when you said it can scramble up your senses when you have something happen to your nose could this lightheaded-ness just be that? or am i losing my mind? maybe its sinus pressure i know my sinuses are swollen....im horrified to look stuff up about potential brain damage from nose surgery.........im not gona do it i not gona do it.

joe - that is scary! i definitely feel like ive been traumatized too!

i suck!!!!!!!!!!!!!
but you guys are awesome i love this site.
5weeksand5dayssincesurg<3

Posted 3/30/2009 12:59 AM (GMT 0)
did you take your clo****pan when the pain started, and did it help. I know for me when I am anxious I tend to focus so much on what hurts which just intensifies any pain i may have. Also if you are stressed you can put a lot of tension on the muscles which can give you a whopper of a headache that can persist as long as you remain stressed. When you anxious mornings are always the worst, its when all the scary thoughts come rushing back, but this to shall pass.

By all means avoid the internet. Nothing good has ever come from my symptom checking. Besides you had surgery and presumably by a good doctor who has done this before. He or she has probably seen and heard everything. I know with my leg my doc was great with all my questions and concerns.

I also found out I was allergic to vicoden when I broke out in a full body rash a couple days after surgery. It happens, that's why there are multiple pain medications not every medication works for every person.

As for the people that said surgery isn't a big deal ask them if they would want to do it. I bet the answer is no. You are a lot stronger than I think you are giving yourself credit for.

Hang in there
Posted 3/30/2009 3:23 AM (GMT 0)
Never heard of negative feelings after sinus surgery. My daughter is having this surgery done soon, to correct her deviated septum and polyp(s) too. I hope everything goes smoothly, but she knows how important it is to keep in touch with the surgeon.

When someone has any kind of surgery, you never know the side effects until you come home. I can't take very strong painkillers for more than a few days without some kind of bad reaction.
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