oh not again

I hate having anxiety.  It seems to go away for a bit and then comes back.  I'm so sick of worrying about silly things.  I don't feel like I've learned how to properly deal with my anxiety.  I just made got an appt next week to see a therapist.  I'm on Zoloft 100mg and klonopin 1 mg at night but sometimes that doesn't help.  I can't stop the thoughts.  I have made friends with someone recently who also suffers and they told me that instead of distracting myself that I avoid my anxiety.  I'm not sure how I do that or what the difference is.  My main fear right now is going crazy.  It sucks cause I can usually pinpoint where my anxiety comes from.....whether its hormones or no sleep or whatever.  I feel like its been looming over me like a dark cloud.  I know today I took a nap and that usually gets me anxious....not sure why.  I took a shower and put this special conditioner in it.  I got out of the shower and felt like my one eye was irritated.  I didnt pay much attention then after I woke up from my nap I was ok then it starting to creep in.  I started thinking that this new stuff I used on my hair got in my eye and now i'm gonna go blind.  sounds crazy right?  I went and checked the tube and it didn't have any crazy warnings on it like dont get into eyes.  So why do I still have anxiety?  Why can't I fight it?  Do I try to watch tv and hope it goes away or should I let it happen and not avoid it.  I don't know what to do.  After suffering from this for 8yrs.....why can't I get a handle on it.  Why does it keep coming back?  I feel so alone.  My friend who has anxiety keeps making negative comments that don't help me.  Like tonight I told him what I was thinking about my eye and he said oh he's not that bad.  I try to be so positive to him and he's no help.  I need some help.  What do I do?

First of all, I think anxiety is common, and I have worried and thought some MUCH crazier things than you (I know it's not a contest, I just hope it assures you that you aren't crazy, I don't consider myself crazy either). I am on 200 mg zoloft. It took a lot of time and patience because yes, I went through the insomnia with it too and months before it started to work. But after 4 or 5 months, tough months, IT WORKED. Maybe talk to your doctor about if your dosage is therapeutic enough amountwise, etc. My doctor gradually up-ed my dosage. It's hard to fight anxiety, bottom line is don't beat yourself up if you do have anxieties- just take it a day at a time and don't feel like you've already lost the battle if you have an attack each day, in time things will get better or you will adapt and know how to cope with the right meds or whatever. Hope this helps!

thank you for the words of support. Everytime my anxiety strikes back and I start feeling alone....this forum and the members here are always here to help me and give more words of encouragement. I am happy to have made it through the night. Just gotta get through this day. I am gonna try to not let the anxiety take over. I am still having trouble with my eye but I am trying to be realistic.....I'm gonna try to take this anxiety head on. I don't want to constantly live in fear that its gonna come back and what if this and what if that. Thank you all and I am gonna be posting alittle more until I can get this under control.

Hi angel-

You are amongst friends here. we all suffer various forms of anxiety and panic and due to that shared experience, we understand each other. you are not going crazy- none of us are. we just feel that way because we often feel our circumstances are beyond our control. thats when its time to do something like seeing a therapist, journalling your thoughts and feelings- and coming here to share your problems, cos a problem shared is a problem halved.

Here for you,

Maz XX