Telephones

This is really weird, I know, and I am never sure how to mention this sort of thing because... people in my life wouldn't pay attention to how much it bothers me now.

I've never been comfortable using phones, I never liked not being able to see the person on the other side, what they are doing, rolling their eyes? trying not to laugh? just plain bored? I can never guess what people are thinking or feeling too well without seeing them. There were times I'd freeze up and not be able to pick up the phone at all.

But a few months ago, I was talking to a friend, and I was going off on some mad track, and I started talking about space ants, and how they crawl into your brain through telephones. It was all meant to be joking, but since then it's like my mind has decided I believe it. I don't, it's stupid, but whenever I pick up a phone, I start to panic, and I can feel them trying to get at me.

I couldn't explain this to anyone in person. I know it's weird.

H.M

I have a bit of a warped sense of humor too and often people will think I am serious, or perhaps even a bit around the bend.

I sense the anxiety this is causing you and it sounds like a phobia to me. Telephonophobia is considered to be a specific phobia. It is generally accepted that phobias arise from a combination of external events (i.e. your joking comment ) and internal predispositions (i.e. heredity or genetics). Many specific phobias can be traced back to a specific triggering event and I agree talking with a specialist may be the wise choice for you.

Kindly,
Kitt

Hi H.M
Good to meet you. I can relate to you on this one as I have difficulty using the phone, I know that this is a direct symptom of my Aspergers Syndrome. I struggle with body language at the best of times so find that talking over the phone I never know when I am supposed to speak or end a call. I never speak on the phone for long and my friends find that I end conversations very abruptly .
Hibee

Thanks for everyone's replies.

I'm still coming to terms with my mobile phone, I actually screamed when it started ringing. I can't stand carrying it with me, but my parents insist I do just in case. I can convince myself it's a clock though. As long as it doesn't screech at me.


Hibee: I found the trick was to make friends that talk a lot. You don't even need to be with the phone, you just shout at it every now and then "Yeah", "uh-huh", "I'm still here, go on". I took my friend a while to get used to the fact that, mid conversation, I might drop it whilst talking to her, or hang up, or simply leave it for someone else to do it. But she's lucky, because she's one of about three people I can actually bear using a phone for. I almost cried when I found out by e-mail that someone had tried to get in touch with a job opportunity, and I'd lost out because I hadn't answered.

Ah well, it's just another bullet point on my list of things to staple to my doctors forehead so he can read it and he doesn't have to see me pretending my chair is an airplane. (I'm 8 years old at heart)

Thanks.
H.M.

Hi BluAngel

Aspergers Syndrom is basically high functioning autism. The main traits are feeling awkward in social situations and not being able to read body language and the list goes on. Anxiety is a big part of aspergers and I also have ocd and lot of these disorders go together and it is common to have more than disorder. I hope this answers some of your question sorry I have a lot on at the moment so quite a short reply.

Hibee

Hibee: I was always curioius, how can they know if it's AS?? I have a lot of AS traits, and because I was told I was AS from the age of 14, it's been the main focus from then on in my school life. "How to make friends" "How to recognise body languge and facial expressions" "How to feel less anxious in social situations" which I felt went off at a complete tangent to what I needed help with.
I was always bored in my sessions, especially if we talked about anxiety, because I do know a lot about it and the only thing I want to know is what are the triggers and how is it that someone can make themselves that scared of something simply because of a completely random and irrational thought.
It was annoying, I didn't "not recognise" social cues, I out and out ignored them because I found the wall more interesting. On a whole, people bore me, or scare me by being unpredictable and potentially threatening......anyone would be scared of someone who appears threatening.

Hi HB & HM - I was reading your posts n while I dont have AS, Ive a variety of dxs that seem to cause, fuel or are otherwise intwined. I agree that its important 2 have the right dx, meds, therapies...identifying triggers, its all part of it. Then ultimately we come 2 actions - how 2 manage it. Im baffled as 2 how I can become so physically effected by what are thoughts. Some of the people n situations I feared I sort of desensitized myself 2 them I think. Having ptsd I put myself in those situations and then went beyond...wouldnt recommend that 2 everybody. That part I did by working in and eventaully running programs for men who had addictions in a prison system. For me, I can only say 4 me, that took me thru those fears and out the other side. Yet others, seemingly smaller, cont to plague me. Ive found 4 me it took talk therapy, the rite meds, a lot of acceptance of having the disorders period. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy helps greatly. Its about catching the thoughts, interpreting the feelings about them & getting a grip on the irrational thoughts. Sounds daunting but it isnt really. I try 2 use mirrors...ppl I can call & tell them whats going on & trying 2 remember its not me...its the anxiety talking & separate it frm myself. I have such a long way 2 go & prob have more bad days than good, just wanna quit. But Im determined 2 have some peace of mind in this life. So on the journey goes. Tough 2day. Looking 4 2morro 2 be better. HUGGZ