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Posted 7/29/2011 3:38 AM (GMT 0)
I came home early from work because I was having a huge anxiety attack for no apparent reason. When I got in my car to go home I ripped my bumper off. therefore, causing me even more anxiety and when I make it home I find a disconnect notice from our utility company for just 12.00. From that moment on I feel as though the walls are closing in on me, I feel very claustrophobic and hard to breathe, and every sound is making me crazy. I have now worked myself up so bad I can't catch my breath, throwing up, chest hurts, back hurts....list goes on and on. I'm laying down but I can't seem to relax at all...I'm so tense and now I feel I'm bout to have a migraine. cry . I already cried myself to sleep last night for no reason and I feel like I wanna cry again because I'm tired of feeling like this. I tried to at least talk to my boyfriend to try to calm down, but he doesn't seem to really care to listen (that's how I feel). I don't know what to do. I feel like if I talk it would make me feel a little better. thank you for listening.
Posted 7/29/2011 4:01 AM (GMT 0)
Hi ggnl, I am sorry that you are having a hard night. I can really struggle with feeling overwhelmed with just the slightest things happening as well. It is like our minds and bodies are sometimes just a few steps away from anxiety over-load at times!

Have you tried chatting? If you need someone to talk to, there are lots of great members usually talking this time of night:) I have to get my daughter to bed, but I'll check-in in about twenty minutes or so.

TTY soon,
S.C.
Posted 7/29/2011 4:39 AM (GMT 0)
I haven't tried chatting yet....is there a messenger on here that I don't know about or you mean messaging?

so far I'm doing a little better. I'm able to relax (a little) but my head and body are still aching from the attack earlier. I'm doing the breathing exercises to try to get my heart to stop beating so fast. If there is anyone up I would love to talk just to talk. Thank you :)
Posted 7/29/2011 4:50 AM (GMT 0)
I was just in chat...Up at the top of the page you will see the icon in between calendar and search...you just have to log in
Posted 7/29/2011 5:20 AM (GMT 0)
Sorry I missed you in chat...looks like you are logged in, but I didn't get a response...next time!

Okay, got to go to bed. I hope that you have a good night's sleep and that tomorrow is a better day for you:)
S.C.
Posted 7/29/2011 5:20 AM (GMT 0)
I finally made it in it kept shutting down on me so I had to reinstall quicktime.
Posted 7/29/2011 5:21 AM (GMT 0)
Have a good night and thanks for at least trying to chat :) I tried but stupid technology prohibited me at the moment. Have a good night sleep I'm more relaxed now and feel like I could pass out.
Posted 7/29/2011 7:56 AM (GMT 0)
Hi geek, I'm so sorry that you had such a crappy day, Im on a different time zone to you so I think your asleep when I'm awake...I wish I had been awake we could've had a chat....I'm sure your boyfriend does care, men are just sometimes wrapped up in their own stuff and they don't listen to us...it doesn't mean he doesn't care...

And I know it's exhausting being anxious all the time, it takes a lot of energy to keep our nerves so hyped up...I hope you have a good sleep and tommorrow is better.....hugs to you shannon turn
Posted 7/30/2011 1:36 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks shanny....unfortunately I wasn't able to sleep at all until 7:00 this morning and had to get up at 10:30 am for work. Right now my body feels really weak and everything feels like it just wants to go limp...it's really getting bad because I'm scaring myself silly (but I have not googled!) I went for a walk and it was pretty hot, I'm not used to exercising so I'm probably dehydrated. I'm trying not to think too much about it but it's hard. I've just never felt like this before and it scares me a little.
Posted 7/30/2011 1:40 AM (GMT 0)
and I hate how I feel like I need reassurance all the time. It's really annoying me a lot more than it annoys other people. I try to tell my mom...try being in my shoes for just a couple minutes and you'll see that it's more annoying to keep having it play over and over and over again in your head the thoughts you don't want it drives me up the wall unless I can ask someone and get reassurance and that annoys me even more. I've just been more spacy lately. :/
Posted 7/30/2011 4:15 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Geek, no wonder you feel all spacey, you have hardly had any sleep, you've been really anxious and that tires you out believe me, drink plenty of fluids if it's hot you might be a bit dehydrated that can make you feel weak and limp too..

I ask for reassurance a lot too don't worry it's all part of the anxiety, and once we get reassurance it holds us for a little while and then you feel like you need reassurance again....it's damm anxiety....does it all the time.

Please don't be scared you will be ok, try and rest when you get home from work, I know exercise is good for you but maybe do it when it's a bit cooler......I hope your feeling better, remember we are all only a post away your not alone...your friend shannon :-)
Posted 7/30/2011 4:18 AM (GMT 0)
Oh and by the way I'm SO PROUD OF YOU FOR NOT GOOGLING yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah way to go girl scool
Posted 7/30/2011 10:25 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you! :) I got a lot of sleep last night and I felt fine all day at work and though yay it's gone! but then around 3:30 all of a sudden I got that sick feeling my stomach went into knots and couldn't breathe. so I'm saying screw it and going to my doctor and pay what I can because this week has to be the worst I've ever had it. Then I found out that both my parents suffered from panic/anxiety disorder in their 20s. I finally talked to my mom today and broke down crying to her that she made me feel like I was crazy and she felt so bad because she didn't realize I thought that. So she began to tell me about her attacks and how worse they were for her because she didn't have anyone to talk to about it at the time. So it kind of helped to finally know my mom really does know what I'm going through, but I still feel really sick right now. I think I'm gonna go take a little nippy nap before I have to go pick my boyfriend up from work. hopefully I'll feel a little bit better .....hopefully I'll be able to sleep.
Posted 7/30/2011 10:52 PM (GMT 0)
Anxiety has been proved to have both "Nautre and Nurture" roots. It can be genetic, or in the way that we were raised, or totally random. It is interesting to know though that you come by it naturally hugh? All of the women in my family have struggled with A/P at some point in their lives.

It is comforting to have your family understand and support you...this is a bit of a bright spot among your stuggles:)

Take care and keep posting,
S.C.
Posted 7/31/2011 1:01 AM (GMT 0)
Hi SC and geek, just wanted to let you know that my mum, both sisters and my younger brother have all had problems with anxiety, depression and OCD, so I think in some families it definitely seems to have a genetic background .....interesting isn't it....it could also be learned behavior, when I was a little girl my mum was always crying or having a lie down because of her nerves...

I often wonder do I respond the same way as her because that's all I ever saw and knew...

I will contemplate that one I think.....hugs to you both be well..shannon
Posted 7/31/2011 4:52 AM (GMT 0)
I've always wondered that too Shanny because my mother is the same way she has been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress and High Anxiety. She's been that way ever since my teenage years.

I never napped but I do feel better after I ate and was back to feeling somewhat normal. So pray that I sleep well tonight and things will be better in the morning. I'm going to call my dr monday and see if I can get an appt just to calm my nerves and see what he recommends. My job used to offer some kind of Employee Assistance program that I wish we still had now (no longer do because we're closing in Sept) because they would have paid for 5 therapy sessions. At least that would have been something. I didn't know that or I would have gone a long time ago.

and SC It is definitely a comfort to know that both my parents do understand, and that it could possibly be genetic.
Posted 7/31/2011 6:42 AM (GMT 0)
Hi geek, good idea go see you dr and see what he/she can recommend for you....and if you do some relaxation, breathing nice bath before bed you might get a good nights sleep...I'm glad you have understanding parents it helps to have someone who understands what your going thru doesn't it....talk too you soon best wishes shannon
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