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Posted 8/7/2011 1:03 AM (GMT 0)
I spent a fortune and got my teeth done a year and half ago. I got veneers. To those who do nto know what veneers are they are like caps that go on your teeth to enhance your smile..and the worst part is it's permanent.

So i made a huge mistake. I got them to make my smile better. Some people get braces; i got veneers.

I'm 28 years old planning to go to Grad school this September and i'm scared to meet new people.

Why?

I was happy with my teeth originally until I started getting negative comments by strangers and my family.

Strangers would say 'o m g your teeth are so white' 'why are they so white' 'what did you do to your teeth they look like dentures'

mind you, these are young immature people who are still in second year of college telling me.

it really has made me get major panic attacks; thinking about my teeth 24/7, i cant focus on anything else.

i cant re do it, b/c it's gonna cost a fortune. i'm stuck with them.

family has told me not to redo it; it looks fine but i havent gotton one compliment on my teeth i feel like a freak of nature!

i liked them before i started getting the comments. they kinda stick out a little so maybe thats why it looks fake?

or maybe i got them too white?

Help please! anyone else have veneers? :)
Posted 8/7/2011 2:42 AM (GMT 0)
Hi JP and welcome. I am sorry that you are unhappy with your procedure and your new smile. I don't have them myself, but have known some people that have been unsatisfied with their cosmetic 'fixes'.

How do you feel about it? You mentioned other's reactions, but what about you? If you like the new teeth, then I think that you don't have a problem other than deflecting rude comments. I have had people ask me innapropriate questions regarding my physical apperance (I work with children/adolescents) and I have learned to reply with a great big "BECAUSE I'M AWESOME!!!" If my roots have grown out and my hair is two different colors...it's because I'm awesome. If my fingernails/toenails are chipped and a royal mess...you guessed it..it's 'cause I'm awesome:)

This is just my silly response, but it works for me. You will probably want to come up with your own. Maybe "Some of us are just lucky I guess" or "I am just the way I'm meant to be". It pretty much ends the conversation then and there!

If you however are truly unhappy with the way your smile looks, then I would suggest saving up to have a repair/reversal. Your smile is a major source of self-esteem, as it is one of the first things that others will notice about us.

Until you get it figured out, try to remember to put things in perspective. Not to minimalize your situation, but if your are otherwise healthy and happy, then that is something to be grateful for:)

Take care, and post anytime.
Scaredy Cat
Posted 8/7/2011 3:02 AM (GMT 0)
Wow thank you so much! you're so sweet:) Maybe i should just suck it up and say 'because i'm awesome' to everyones negative remarks.

Because I was originally happy with it. i just started to see the flaws when people crticized me. Plus it'll be a while for me to save up again and re do them.

Thanks :) You rock.
Posted 8/7/2011 7:12 AM (GMT 0)
Hey jade, if you are happy with your teeth don't worry about what people say....maybe they are jealous...often people who are jealous of what someone else has will put them down to make themselves feel better...I bet they look fabulous..and in the words of a very clever woman- scaredy cat if anyone says anything negative about them and asks you why you got them tell them " that I got them because I am awesome"....anyway some people are just rude it takes all kinds to make this world...hugs to you and enjoy grad school..shannon
Posted 8/7/2011 1:54 PM (GMT 0)
Jade,

Hello and welcome.............I am sensitive to people who feel they can make comments about my body, appearance etc.  I often get the,  " You got your hair cut !  I really liked it the way it was"  or " Your looking good and I mean that in a nice way"  -  WHAT - and my favorite hate comment, "We can't all have big boobs like you" !

After many years of feeling beat up and speechless, doubting myself and why people felt they could say whatever they pleased I finally learned from my therapist to respond to these rude comments by simply saying, "What do you mean by that?"

I have now seen more then one person turn speechless :-) .  Of course you have to be able to say this in a very calm and not threatening manner. 

I would love veneers and have had my teeth whitened so remember if you feel good about yourself then your did the right thing for you.

Gentle Hugs,

Kitt

Posted 8/9/2011 10:11 PM (GMT 0)
Jade, your in Grad school! Your a smart individual and on your way in life! It sounds lime you were happy with your teeth until others gave you their unwanted negative input, or criticism is more like it. I can so relate to you. When I was 28 I decided to get braces. I had a bad crossbite and was having terrible jaw pain and grinding my teeth down on one side. I also thought my smile looked "crooked". Working in a dental office I got a considerable discount and that made it even more enticing. So I got them and oh boy let me tell you I heard it all the time. "Why did you get braces, arent you a little old?" "You look so funny!" "when you smile you look weird!" "Your lips look so big!" "What was wrong with your teeth before, I never noticed it!" I became so annoyed and luckily my panic disorder was not a problem for me during that time or else I would have worried about it day and night. Listen, dont worry about what they say! I bet your teeth look great, I bet you look like a movie star! Ignore them, and stick up for yourself! If they make a remark simply say, oh...well I really like them, I'm glad I got them, I think I look great. Sometimes when people realize that you are confident or think you are confident, they bug off : ) best of luck to you, it sounds like you have a bright future ahead and you will be the one with the movie star smile, laughing all the way to the bank!!!!
Posted 8/10/2011 11:12 PM (GMT 0)
I am sure that your teeth are absolutely gorgeous and if I could afford to do veneers I would but thats not going to happen. It sounds like you were happy with your teeth until you started to get some negative comments about them and that made you more self conscious. You said they were people who were immature so chalk their rude comments up to that and move forward and keep smiling and flashing people with those beautiful pearly whites of yours. 8 )
Posted 8/13/2011 11:22 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks everyone for your replies. I guess i'm a little intimidated because I have never gotton people saying anything positive about me. Nobody would say anything about my looks before the veneers as I was just a plane Jane. Now, I just get negative comments more than anything and I'm scared to open my mouth. When I am talking; i feel like people just stare at my teeth and are usually turned off. Thanks for your help everyone - i guess i need to smile when I go to Grad school whether people think I look crazy or not! lol
Posted 8/13/2011 11:23 PM (GMT 0)
On another note, I have had social anxiety since chidhood. Now I am scared I am forming a Body Dysmorphic disorder? I dont know if I should see a Shrink or not - I need this anxiety to go away!
Posted 8/13/2011 11:24 PM (GMT 0)
Also - my problem is I care too much what people think! Ugh!
Posted 8/14/2011 12:21 AM (GMT 0)
Hi JP, the good news is that a lot of the insecurities and issues revolving around our physical appearance usually improves with age. I used to be very self-conscious about certain things...everybody has something that they don't like about their looks. If however, this is causing you too much stress and anxiety, then you will want to seek some help, so that you are not miserable!

If you are interested, there are a couple of free on-line CBT therapy sites that are very good, and can help with issues of anxiety and self-perception. They are called Moodgym and Ecouch and the links are in our Anxiety Resource Guide (main page 3rd post) Maybe give them a try, and see how you feel...it can't hurt.

In the meantime, remember...you look like you do because...you're AWESOME!!!

Take care, and embrace who and how you are:)
S.C.
Posted 8/14/2011 2:30 AM (GMT 0)
Jadedprincess,

Welcome to The Healingwell Site. This is a Wonderful Site with Awesome members. I can totally relate to what your saying. I know some people can handle being put down and others take it so very personal. I am a female and have been bald for about 18 years. I have Alopecia and my hair falls out, so I shave it so I don't have to watch it fall out. I have had the nastiest comments said to me & the worst comments comes from adults. It is hurtful when people say unthoughtful things.

But you are an amazing person, you have a big heart & just keep smiling.
Your Healingwell Friend,
Serenitee

Bipolar 2, Borderline, Anxiety/Panic Disorder, Ptsd
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