tired of living in hell!!!!!

Hello Starlight,

I do not think you are crazy or a freak, I think that all of us on this forum are awesome. For we go through a lot with our panics and anxiety and even tho we are scared we face them head on meds or no meds.

CBT's are very helpful, CBT's have helped a lot of us. I hope they may work to help you :).

SHell

I agree with Kitt- you are a normal person going thru a rough time. It is no more than that.
I remember having panic attack after panic attack. I cried a lot because I thought that I would never be a good mom again. I thought I would never enjoy my children again. But I did and YOU WILL TOO. Right now, you are experiencing some turbulence. The flight attendant always says "Put the air mask on yourself FIRST. Then put it on your child." So at this time, you need to worry about your air mask.

Keep this in mind-- your body and mind will only allow panic to continue for just so long. The energy it takes to sustain a panic attack is immense! Eventually your natural defense mechanisms start to kick in. Try to listen to those coping symptoms. If you feel like crying, then cry. If you feel like sleeping, then sleep. You are in crisis right now and it's okay to take care of yourself.

But when you are just sitting and panicking, push through the panic enough to take steps in the right direction. If you haven't tried hypnosis, then you haven't tried everything. I was right where you are and someone suggested a hypnotist. I thought "No way! I'm not going to waste my time with that!" In a moment of desperation I walked in his office unannounced in the middle of a panic attack. I can't find the words to explain how much it helped me!!! Not only did it help me out of that particular attack, it helped me overcome panic long-term. I went to him for about a year -- hypnosis became my new anxiety drug of choice. Like any drug, I felt relief from it so I wanted more.

I'm not saying to rush out and do hypnosis. I'm saying that there is something out there that is right for you... something that you haven't tried; something that will help you with acute attacks and long-term anxiety. To find it, you may need to push thru the panic, keep moving, keep trying.

I will tell you this: medication was a fantastic quick fix for me, but without learning to achieve calm on my own, I kept wondering why the pills didn't work. They were definitely turning into candy, as you say.

Also take a look at "rebound anxiety" with your medication. I'm sure I was experiencing that when my panic was so intense.
Let us know how you do in the days to come. Just nurture yourself.